Stuttering Support Group

How do you guys deal with stuttering in the real world? I've a high school guy whose learned to cope, but there are times--when reciting something in front of the class or getting into a heated debate--when my stutter becomes very obvious, debilitatint, and often humiliating. What defense mechnanisms, good or bad, have you put in place to deal with your stutter?

Hi Milez, I understand your dilema. I stuttered worse as a younger person but rarily stutter now. I hated to read aloud in class when called on or answer questions in front of the class. I was too embarrassed to tell the teacher I stuttered, so I had to stop and pretend not to be able to read a word in order to "pass the hump", as they say, lol. Now as an adult, if I am in a situation where I need to read aloud, I just say "Pass". Just to save the embarrassment. My boys stutter also .

Hi Milez, my tactic is usually to find another word that I can get out that means the same thing and do some quick thinking to keep my brain guessing that way I seem to get less blocks. This works for fast impromptu speech but not really for more thought out things, like questions.

Hello Milez,

I usually substitute synonymous words as well. This is an unhealthy defense mechanism, but it is helpful in really stressful situations. I think it's unhealthy because avoiding words leads to being fearful of them, but in a sticky situation substitution it is most definitely effective.

A more healthy coping mechanism for me is repeating this mantra: re - lax. I breathe in "re" and exhale "lax." It allows me to calm down and to focus on something aside from my speech. By not focusing on what I'm saying and by focusing on my breath and the word relax, I am able to speak fluently without all the speech tension, without all the tightening in my vocal chords and without all the mental strain that goes into forcing fluent speech.

I hope this helps MIlez. Can you tell me about some of your coping/defense mechanisms?

Dave

Hello Milez. There are no real defense mechanisms for controlling how you will feel when your stutter is noticed. I will tell you this though... confidence is the key to getting over anything. Also once you have put it out there and gained that confidence so that you dont care what people have to say about your stutter, the better off you will be. Be true to yourself and hold you head high. If you stutter, so be it.

I feel that exact same way! Mostly all the people in my life know i stutter and there okay with it! Also I have never felt ashamed of my stuttering because that's who I am and that's what I'm used to but I never let my stutter control me or become me because I am who I am but stuttering doesn't make me its just something that is a part of me.

i hate it when I stutter in front of people, but a way I deal with is I laugh it off. Then I try again, remembering that no one has perfect fluency. Everybody fumbles on words, its just we just fumble more often for some reason.

I have met people with very severe stutters, they can fix it in therapy but they choose to stutter because it is a lot of work to try and not stutter. The people I meet who have the most confidence are often the people with the worst stutters! And the ones I meet who lack confidence may be very mild. Looking at your good points and seeing your stutter as a neutral characteristic helps. Make a list of what you like about yourself and see how special and unique each of you are!

Janna

I agree with the point made about confidence. I've been through several years of speech therapy and even purchased the pricey speecheasy. Without a doubt, the number one thing that has helped me manage my stutter the best is confidence. Without it I revert right back to having a severe stutter. It's taken me many years to finally discover this, but I'm glad I did. How you develop your own self-confidence is different for everyone. The fastest way the works on everyone is to improve their physical appearance. Of course their are other ways, this is one of the most basic and effective ways.

I have a stutter which I mostly manage to hide, but feel anxious 100% of the time that I will stutter. My son, aged 15 has a stutter (2 other family members do too so think it’s hereditary). He has attended The Starfish Project Course in England, UK (cheaper version of The McGuire Programme, founded and run by a former associate of the McGuire Programme) but he does not want to put in the effort to attain more fluid speech with the Starfish Project method (he's thankfully not as bothered by it as I was at his age). It is a terrible affliction which I have to deal with every day of my life. I want to spread the word that I have been helped by listening to Duncan McColl hypnosis CD's while I sleep at night (on repeat). Firstly, I bought the Public speaking CD, Stop Stuttering CD and now the Self Confidence CD which has made a big difference (all @ about £19 and bought online). Duncan’s CD’s are the best ones, his voice is excellent and you get deep relaxation from then when you wake too. They have helped me a lot and my speech has improved, please give these CD’s a try, they may help you too.