Spouses of Bipolar in Active Relationships

Johnyboy, it did not end well. I am now divorced. She is still seeing the guy she cheated on me with. They are now in an open relationship, instead of hiding it. As far as I can tell, neither one is medical compliant. My ex wife did send an email just before the divorce saying she was taking 1/10 of her medications (I am not sure how you can take just 1/10). I think she is taking just enough of her Seroquel to sleep, and not taking anything else. She was complaining of only getting two hours of drunken sleep a night before that.

It seems that they feed off each other. Both of their mania keeps the other's mania going. They are like batteries keeping each other charged. They drink constantly, hang out till late at night at the bars. I dont know how either one can keep a regular life going (though he is a bartender so his hours can fit his lifestyle, and he lives with his mother, so he has no responsibility). She came close to losing her job, but is holding it together for now.

Oh, and on your wife isolating herself from friends. My ex wife isolated herself from friends that were concerned, kept friendships with people that did not care as long as there was a party, and has made a whole bunch of new friends from the bars she hangs out at. It seems she wants to avoid any "downers".

Post edited by: Silverlock, at: 07/13/2012 04:51 AM

sorry to hear that, i dunno what will happen with mine. when i saw her like i said she looked very pale and unwell like how an addict would look.

im not really too bothered by it all now it just makes me angry mostly. i just took the offer of a new house for me and my kids, i handed in my 4 weeks notice on this property today, it couldnt have hapened at a beter time tbh as i can concenrate on the house now and basically forget about her, the only trouble is, it may be around the time of 2 mania triggers for her as it should be around the start of august we move and that is the same time as my birthday followed by the aniversary of her mother's death 2 days later,

add finding out me and the kids have moved away to that mix and god knows what will happen, i am expecting all hell to break loose, but that is her problem not mine. she wont be told where we have moved to, due to her threat of violence, as that was the main reason i told her where to go in the first place,after she attacked me and my daughter in a fight over money for canabis,

Johnnyboy, that all sounds good. Keeping busy and having other things to concentrate on really help.

The violence sucks. My wife did not get violent with me, but she did attack her brother earlier in the night I found out she was cheating. In texts she has also raged quiet easily when things were not going her way. I am pretty sure if I was standing in front of her she would have done something she should not have. I guess I am lucky. I spoke with her first husband and he told me about her actually cutting him on the arm with a kitchen knife when she raged in their marriage. He showed me the scar.

Silverlock I totally agree with you, u have been lucky its just in text, mine cant do that to me cause she thinks i changed my number and i put an app on my phone to block her just incase.

the violence was not a one off, but funny enough it happend just before and just after she was on lithium, but the year she was on it was her most stable for many years, i think as a result of the stability she thought she was ok now and asked to be taken off(she did have some side effects), i remember we talked about it when she started to wean off it and she was confident she could cope because she had some therapy, i objected to it not being replaced with something else and said this would happen,

now look, gone 2 months, drink, drugs and god knows what else, why do pdocs not listen to family