Spouses of Bipolar in Active Relationships

I was at Wal-mart and noticed Catherine Zeta-Jones on the cover of the People magazine. I don't ever buy this magazine, but I did today. I really wanted to read the article about her recent disclosure that she has BPII.

I love the title on the cover: I'm Not Ashamed-battling bipolar disorder. In the article, it says, "In going public with her diagnosis, Zeta-Jones hopes to destigmatize the illness and help others who are undergoing similar struggles. 'This is a disorder that affects millions of people and I am one of them', she tells People in a statement. 'If my revelation of having bipolar II has encourged one person to seek help, then it is worth it. There is no need to suffer silently and there is no shame in seeking help.' She also says, 'If I had diabetes, I would say I had diabetes and I would get treatment for it.' She didn't ask for this disorder. (Seeking help can only happen when you have insurance, not an issue for "stars"--sorry, just had to say it)

They didn't speak of any hypomania, just some anxiety and not wanting to go to restaurants, etc. I think it was a very basic description of the illness. They quoted Dr. David Miklowitz of UcLA School of Medicine saying, (about hypomania) "people notice that they're really charged up or moving a mile a minute, but it's not bad enough that it causes a real disruption in their lives."

That could be disputed. Hypomania can cause a lot of disruption.

They also said that "there may be some fine-tuning down the road" (ya think?) but the actress herself is thrilled with how far she's come. "I feel like I can breathe now, I can exhale and just breathe and that is huge."

I don't know, they kind of depicted that you go for treatment for 5 days, get on the right meds and you might need a little "fine tuning down the road". Maybe that's the way it is for her, or they just don't want to tell about the ugly side of it, but for people reading this article who don't know anything about bp might think that it is cureable instead of manageable.

If any of you read it, let me know what you think. I think it's great that a major "star" is wanting to destigmatize the illness. That is what we've been hoping for. This can only be a good thing. I hope she does more in the future to help with the cause.

If you see the magazine, check out the little article about Nicholas Cage. Does his behavior look like bp to anyone? OMG!

I was at Wal-Mart today, also, and saw the magazine. I didn't purchase one, but I showed it to my husband and he seemed interested that someone more high profile would stand up and say, more or less, this is who I am. And she isn't ashamed. But, he didn't want to buy it. He did look at her face on there for a minute and I knew he was impressed. I hope he will stop looking at his illness as an anchor around his neck, stop being so embarrassed to be diagnosed with bp and learn more about it. Maybe then he will be more apt to get on with life. At least I hope that for him.

That's why I bought it, I wanted to show my husband. I think, especially for guys, when they see a beautiful face on the front of a magazine saying "I have bipolar", and "I am not ashamed", that is the message I want my husband to embrace.

With my analytical mind, WifeBPX, what you posted seems like they are STARTING to get more vocal, but I wonder how much of the stigma is that the sufferer is ashamed of their deeds, and then we only hear about the high profile cases (those ending in murder, for instance).

I feel shame when I yell at my children, or act out. I don't necessarily want to broadcast that everywhere, knowing I love them and they love me. It's hard for someone to say, "Well, not everyone with this disorder kills others," but then other "wrongs" are listed, and the sufferer trying to defend the disorder clams up, knowing that they have done one or two of the things on the list?

I think more honesty is needed, and it's extremely hard to face what bipolar disorder really does. Saying, "Oh, I have agoraphobia and a little shakiness, plus I feel like I can't breathe," is innocent enough. But knowing the things that happen on this forum? What if Catherine physically fought with her husband? What if she lashed out at coworkers? Can she admit that in public and retain her shining star? It's a gamble. I feel for her.

Still, I support her efforts. Doing what she's done is very brave. Very. I hope others will come out and say that they hate this disorder, what it's done to them and their families, and they know they need help to deal with it. This way, maybe the stigma will lessen as the importance of medications takes the lead, instead of the deeds.

Society needs to be ready to forgive the deeds and stand by the sufferers who are getting treated.

Amen, Stolenheart.

Stolen, I was thinking about what you said about the stigma being about being ashamed of their deeds during an episode. I guess if I hadn't done anything public (as a high profile star) I wouldn't be ashamed of my bp either. Or maybe she has revealed her symptoms, as you mentioned, but has kept that all quiet. I guess that's what the stigma is all about, people don't understand that behaviors are symptoms of the disorder. They see someone acting out and call it "crazy".

Anyway, I wonder what she will be doing to help destigmatize the disorder besides just being who she is and having bipolar. It would be great if she could do something to educate others. She probably needs to get educated herself since she is newly diagnosed.

Maybe we should write an open letter to Miss Zeta-Jones, offering our support and recommendations.

Maybe we should, we could ask Michael Douglas to join our group. I think he'd fit in! Seriously! I wonder how one would go about doing that?

I know that you are 100% serious, Wife!!!! Just be careful around a celebrity who probably has stalkers.

I think there are 2 best ways to do it:

1. Just put it out here, on the web somewhere, or on youtube.

2. Approach the press. Maybe write in to People, with a reply, or submit an editorial to a a national newspaper.