Spouses of Bipolar in Active Relationships

Thanks for the love and support Married.

I know I am so needy latly, I really do wish to give as much back to the group as I get, sometimes I just feel like you all do so much for me and I just dont have it right now to give back.

Thank you all so much for helping me through this.

How did your day go today? I worried about your hubby causing some problems.

And please, Enough! Every time I ask for thoughts and prayers, you have been there. Not one of us knows where we will be next week (I remember the way the world spun out from under me when I was diagnosed with breast cancer three years and 6 months ago and I really really wish I had had all of you around then!!!!!), so let us just support you when you need it and we all understand that we will need it some day too and you will be there for us.

Thanks married

We ending up having dinner at my sisters, I think it was to much for both of us this year with mom being gone. We bought almost everything already cooked and just did what ever.she did a eater egg hunt for her kids and my youngest, he had a great time playing with them. I was happy to see that after he was so upset last night.

My day was fine till the end, my youngest wanted to call his dad. He did not answer but called back 30 min later. I answered. He was asking me about our oldest and if he could take him out of school for a day next week. I was being polite and offered some ideas to him to help him get back on track with him and he says" I don't need parenting advice from you" in a snotty tone, so I snapped back and said "don't talk to me like that, he hung up without even talking to our youngest. He is maintaining his bad attitude. His dad has always been a sore spot for us. He does not hold marriage very high, thinks relationships come and go, so every time hubby gets around him we have issues.

On a good note I had a nice long talk with his mother, she at least acknowledges hubbys issues and says what a jerk he is being. She said she is going to talk to him about doing stuff like that to our son. She is really mad at him. At the same time wont confront the illness and thinks it's ok that he is hiding from it. She seems to hold the idea that, that is just how he is and we have to accept him that way.

Well I don't, I am done with this, done trying, moving on. Time for me to get a life that does not revolve around him.

I agree with you Enough. Sometimes losing someone very close to us, that was good and loving toward us, makes us really examine others who have an opportunity to have a relationship with us--but are squandering that opportunity. So, losing your sweet mother probably makes you see your husband in a different light, now. His lack of compassion and understanding toward you and the kids is really magnified, at this time. I wish you blessings at this difficult time in your life. Things can only get better. Take care, and know we are here for you.

We're all needy or we wouldn't be in a support group! But we are all here to lean on each other. Being part of such a great group means that no individual must bear it all by themselves. We're all here for you!

I completely understand your feelings of being done, being tired of trying, and being ready for a new life that doesn't revolve around him. I'm new here and am not familiar with your specifics, but I have been with a BP husband for 11 years now and know the situation can wear you down. It wears down your nerves, your patience, your energy, and your emotions. It's exhausting. Hang in there. Tomorrow is another day for things to get better for you.

Enough, Im glad you had a good Easter and I am sure it was comforting to be with your sister and family. The only one that knows your loss is your sister and you both have that common bond.

Im sorry he is still being nasty towards you, you don't deserve that and I am glad you are moving on without him for now. You deserve to be happy, we all do, and him having this disorder is beyond your control unfortunately. I understand they project their unhappiness on the ones they love most because it is safe, but it is so destructive.....Jeesh!

I don't know, I know our God has a plan for us, but sometimes he makes us take too many detours to get there.

( ( ( ( (Enough) ) ) ) )

We're always here for you, enough. Now is your time for support receiving, not giving. (Although, even in your situation, I have seen you offer support many times) Come here and tell us what's on your mind. We'll all help you think things through and you will be fine. I can tell you are so strong, everything is going to be alright.

Feeling stronger today, thank god. The weekend was really rough many more days like that and I will be the one checking into the hospital.

He is home from NY and today called to pick up our youngest. He is such a daddys boy, even though he was so heart broken he was quick to forgive and eager to hang out with him.

He was polite to me when he picked him up. I had a feeling he might have been waiting for me to strik up a conversation about things, but I did not. I dont know if he called any lawyers like he said he was going to, I have no doubt he left NY with money from his dad to do it, so I guess only time will tell. It is so hard to not ask or talk with him about it but I just cant do it. He has taken so much from me and I cant believe he did this to me. I just bureid my mom, not even two weeks and he wants to take my kids away and leave me alone on Easter, then the very day I go through my moms things, he pulls complete melt down raging at me and threating divorce for no reason. It was all to much.

Hang in there Enough, you are doing fine! Be good to yourself

Enough, I really think you are on the right track in not striking up a conversation with him and questioning him about whether he meant what he said, etc. I think the less attention you give him for his horrendous behavior, the better. He is obviously completely insensitive and possesses no compassion towards your situation. I really don't think he deserves any consideration for what he thought was you snubbing him by not answering the phone. It really is too much. He is over the top and you don't have to take it. If he was thinking clearly at all, he would be so gentle with you right now. You are hurting from all directions and his behavior is causing your hurt to multiply. I think during this time of grieving, it would do you good to avoid him if at all possible. You really don't need his bs. Just my opinion. Hate to see you hurting. Hugs and take care of you!