Shyness Support Group

What techniques or medications do you use to cope with your shyness that work for you?

Are there things you've tried that do not work for you? What are they? (Perhaps they will work for someone else.)

Have you been shy all your life? Have you made any progress?

I have not found medications to be very helpful. Yes, they can reduce some of the anxiety. However, I have not found them to do much to actually increase my self-confidence. I have found a three-pronged approach of visualization, graduated desensitization, and self acceptance to work the best for me.

Post edited by: TimArends, at: 10/08/2009 12:20 PM

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i am seroquil, which helps with anxiety some, so i have found i am a little more aoutgoing when i am not so anxious. i have had therapy too that has boosted my self-confidence, but i am still really shy

When I overcame my shyness I tackled it hardcore from every possible angle... but the things that helped the most was a combination of 2 methods.

One building my confidence by challenging myself to face bigger and bigger fears all the time.

and 2 reprogramming my mind by removing all my limiting beliefs, reprogramming my thoughts to be more outgoing, and getting rid of everything that was in my way.

Now I'm confident enough to dance on the stage at a bar or play and sing guitar in front of crowds of people. before these things would have been impossible for me.

Like ender i try to build my confidence by challenging myself. If i feel afraid in a social environment I just push myself to be more social and after a while the anxiety goes away on its own and i feel more confortable in front of those people next time I see them. I always try to think to myself wif i say something stupid or embarrass myself that's ok because i'd rather feel embarrased than have regret.

One thing I've found that has helped me is the strategy of, over a very long period of time, getting myself to be that slightest bit more confident than I'm comfortable with. Things like telling a joke instead of giving a straight response to a question, or asking a stranger for the time, should be considered major victories (depending on the severity of the shyness). Over time, things that seemed difficult became easier, and I found my once crippling shyness far less of a force in my life. Hopefully some of you will benefit from this advice, but I have only my own experience to support its effectiveness.

I have not been able to overcome shyness; it has evolved overtime but it's still there. The main issue is self-confidence.

I just think taking drugs for shyness is a no no.

I remember once I built up the courage to ask my doctor for a drug for social anxiety. I took a dose of this drug right before a get together. The doctor never told me that one should not take this drug with alcohol. At the get together I drank a couple of glasses of wine. Then the drug really kicked in and social anxiety went down the toilet. But unfortunately with that, went my self-respect and I started talking total nonsense. So unfortunately there is no quick fix.

I agree very much with Mat above, shyness alone is not really the sort of thing that can be medicated. You could take pills to make you feel temporarily less inhibited (or you could drink - not that I recommend that as a treatment), but niether of those help the core of shyness, the lack of self-confidence and self-esteem that drives us to act shy.

I tried Paxil and it did take away my shyness but I felt like I was no longer me. I have been shy my whole life and to suddenly turn into an outgoing person didn't feel right. Not to mention I am embarassed when I look back on it. I have gotten much better around people since I just let myself be shy. I just go with it now and I don't talk much but at least I feel true to myself.

Post edited by: Clara76, at: 07/31/2012 10:41 PM