Sex Addiction Support Group

I am a 22 year old man and I am very worried about where my life is headed. I seem to live 2 completely separate lives.. Everyone sees me as a well adjusted young man in a committed relationship (I have been dating my high school sweetheart whom I love more than anything). But when I get home all I can do is go onto anonymous chat sites looking for cyber-sex. It started out with an hour or two here and there but it has gotten to the point where I am staying up until 5 in the morning and then waking up at 8 just to get back onto the sites. And when I am on these sites I am not the person I want to be. The longer I have been on them the more I want to push the envelope..I know I shouldn't and I'm ashamed of what I'm doing but younger girls become more appealing to me when I am anonymous. I'm not even attracted to them but the thrill of doing something so wrong arouses me. It's disgusting. I need to stop because I have made the mistake of giving out more personal information like email or skype to younger girls and I don't want to end up in jail. I don't want to lose my girlfriend and I don't want to be like this anymore. As soon as I log off I feel such remorse and disgust towards myself. Please I need help I don't want to go down this road anymore.

Hello Gatorguy, and welcome. It sounds like you are taking your first steps toward a new life - gongratulations for that. I know right now it feels scary and overwelming but with work and trust life can get better.

Since you state you have a problem and you want to change it's time to start looking at ways to help your change. Coming on here is a great first step. We have many members who share our support and tools for recovery with each other. What other methods might you want to look into? 12 step group? Therapy? Books? Prayer? There are many paths to take, what is important is that you find the one that feels to be calling to you.

Follow JonesFalls advice. I do share your struggle with the irony of your life. Ditto on all your emotions about your girlfriend and your two personalities. I am learning that is not uncommon amoung us addicts. Anyway you sound like a great person who has gone astray, a diamond in the mud. Read my trigger discussion. You may find some of the triggers are similiar. Write yours down and then plan an attack to divert them. Its working for me. Like JonesFalls says..step by step moment by moment