Separation & Divorce Online Support Group

I am just in the early stages of seperating from my husband. I am the one who wanted the seperation. But it still doesnt change the fact that it is difficult and emotional for me as well as him. He thinks I am doing this because I dont love him anymore and that is the furtest thing from the truth. I am doing it because I do love him. About a year and a half ago I was diagnosed with spinal stenosis, disc herniation, arthritis in the spine, and most recently depression. It is hard enough to live with all of these things without the person you are married to adding even more of a strain on you. I stay in constant pain and some days I cant even leave the couch. i do not have to work, but I am a stay at home mom of 2 and I am a full time student getting my degree in Criminal Justice. I should finish up in about 8 months. being married to Jesse before wasnt such an issue because I didnt have all these issues to deal with and I could take care of everything for him from cleaning the house to paying the bills and washing his clothes, doing everything with the kids, running all the errands, all the cooking, and keep him up to date on what he needed to do everyday because if I didnt then it wouldnt get done. So, now that I have all these other medical problems I have to deal with I can not handle being with someone who seems to equivilate to having another child. And I definetely can not hand will not deal with that. I love him more than anything, other than my children. But if he cant change his ways then we can not be together. He just doesnt seem to understand that!

I totally understand where you are. My stbx also was dx'd with Spinal Stenosis & Disc Herniation. He also sounds a bit like your stbx. Less of a partner and more of another child. Spinal Stenosis is a horrible painful disease. Have you thought about surgery? The recovery time is long but it works. My stbx is recovering now from it.

Sending you lots of hugs and support!!!!

Welcome to the group.

I've never heard the term 'stbx' before!

Yeah sometimes the spouse just doesn't 'get it' and that in itself is stressful.

LOL yes I am an acronym junkie.... Soon to be ex(stbx). I left a site previously because the members were less than supportive. I'll have to get together a common acronym key.

I like that acronym I had a stbx for over a year but now thank goodness he's just an x LOL!!