Retinitis Pigmentosa Support Group

So my wife and I are off to the first spring BBQ of 2011 and it occurred to me that the first thing I thought of was not good food, cold beer, or pleasant conversation. No, the first thing that came to mind was being in a crowd of people, looking at a table of food, and being a little uncertain as to what everything was, or where the handle of the spoon was, or any number of such questions.

I have in the past been completely mistaken about what I put on my plate and ended up with some bizarre meals as a result - like a plate full of condiments and no entree. Now I always follow my wife through the line so that I can get anonymous help if needed. It only occurred to me today that this happens enough to cause just a little bit of anxiety. Not a lot, not enough to change my behavior, but it crossed my mind.

Has anyone else recently crossed this threshold?

Yes I can relate. On our recent cruise I requested during the planning stages that we be seated near the entrance so I didn't have to negotiate thru the maze of tables and kids. Also I requested that my famly be seated alone. I figured that I didn't care if they saw me make a mess but I didn't want strangers to see me that way.

Then just yesterday we went out to eat and I found the garnish on my plate to be rather bland when I mistakened it for my vegies lol

I guess that I am in the same boat as you. If I have to go through a line with a plate in my hand I either drop some of the food off my plate or run into the back of the person in front of me. Like you said who knows what some of the food is that you placed on your plate. My wife mostly tells me to stay were I am and she will get me a plate. I sometimes feel like I am two years old and my mommy is taking care of me. I wonder what people are thinking of me by having my wife get my plate.

Hey Andy maybe when I get on the cruise this summer, people will think that I have not gotten my sea legs yet or been too long at the bar.

See you or not,

Buffets are murder in my opinion. Dodging people with full plates, trying to figure out what foods I'm looking at. So Frustrating! One time I got some meat and what I thought was mashed potatoes. Took a bite and it was cool whip. eck

I passed this threshold a looong time ago. I cannot do buffets and anxiety in social situations is killer. My husband has to help me get my plate and carries it for me so that I don't spill it on everyone. Of course, I've always had a severe case of public anxiety unless I was drinking alcohol and boy then I was little miss social all of a sudden. Quite a scene I'm sure. LOL

My wife and I developed a pretty good system. I hold the plates, napkins and silverware, and she loads up the plates. It's actually a good system even when you're not compensating for low vision. We put this into practice last night and it worked like a charm.

The only issue was that in shaking hands with someone, I missed completely. Not only did I feel silly, but his fingernail went up the back of my hand, leaving a nasty three inch scratch. That was a low-vision hazard that I had not anticipated.

In the situation of shaking hands, I've learned to make sure I'm the first one to extend a hand so that I don't miss theirs. There are still a few occasions where I miss it, but for the most part it works. I've always been referred to as a snob in social settings because I don't see a lot of what's going on around me and in most cases where I am, people aren't aware that I have a visual problem. Just think that I'm a snob. I'm slowly coming around in letting people know though.

Yeah, the goal would be to stick out a hand and let them find it, but my reflexes aren't that fast, and I'm not used to planning that far ahead. I'm sure I'll have plenty of practice in the years to come.

Yep, that happen to me amny time. I got to the point to ask for help like go with your friend and ask what is what in buffet and at picnic, I would ask them if they would just make me a plate of food(most of time they don't mind doing it for you because they know you can't see to well and don't want to bang into anything. It can be frustrating, that is for sure but not a whole lot you can do but make the best of it.

I generally avoid buffets. I and my wife attains buffets only when our kids are with us.

ssb.