hissong
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I too suffered a double assault, one at the young age of 13 and then again at 43. While the first assault was my first sexual experience it caused me more emotional and mental problems so to speak and the second one seems to be worse with physical and internal injuries, on top of the mental, emotionaland spiritual damage caused from senseless acts by a complete stranger. That was 7 years ago and two surgeries later, several attempts at physical therapy I'm still suffering many symptoms, mostly physical pain in my sacral lower lumbar areas that radiates out into my hips and thighs and walking is pretty tough most all the time now. I was recovering from a serious fall that required surgery and if that wasn't enough was rear ended by a drunk driver and left very injured in my back 3 weeks before the assault. I have become a total hermit except for Dr apps, church when I can, grocery store, pay bills and that's it. I have no family support whatsoever. My parents both passed away both within a year after my assault as well as my baby brother to a heroin overdose. I am a very talented and gifted musician but not active with it anymore, therein lies the depression. Wow! I've gotten myself alot of counseling and getting ready to start at it again with a new better one! I am here if anyone needs to talk. I am caring and kind by nature but the pain is vicious. I am going to have to increase my pain patch back up to 75 from 50mg..Fentynal...when pain levels are too high it's as if I go into this zone and I'm sure medical marijuana has a little to do with that, but it mostly anesthetizes my body and really helps my headspace. I would like to say that I do have a prescription for it and my personal physician is ok with it. You are all special, just realize that you have a higher calling on this earth and maybe you're too good to be out in the world so just pray and keep praying and reaching out! Can't do it alone... hissong   Post edited by: hissong, at: 04/04/2008 00:41 Post edited by: hissong, at: 04/04/2008 01:51 |
Sorry for what you have been through. You sound like a very strong positive person from what you've written.
