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04/17/2012 05:25 PM

Hi

Hailyn85
 
Posts: 5
New Member

Hello I have not really talked to anyone about this and didn't know what to do so I thought I would start here. It's been almost a year since it happened. I was raped by someone I trusted someone who was suppose to be my friend. It didn't happen just once, it happened about 3 times. Some of it still foggy and I don't really want to go into details right now. This has been very difficult for me and I just don't think I can deal with this on my own. I haven't even told my parents. I'm scared they won't believe me.
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04/17/2012 07:11 PM
hiall
hiall  
Posts: 1881
VIP Member

Hello Hailyn85 and welcome to the group. I am sorry about what happened to you. Are you safe now? Away from the person(s) that hurt you? Have you talked to a counselor about this? One thing you can do is call RAINN. When you call you will be routed to an advocate in your area. These advocates are trained and can help you over the phone with advice and also let you know of resources in your area.

You dont have to tell any details here. You say only what you feel like saying. Take your time.

You said you haven't told your parents, do you want to? Maybe you want support from your family? Some survivors write a letter and leave it somewhere so the friend or family member will find it. If you think your parents wont believe you maybe telling an uncle or an aunt or maybe a friend and they can tell your parents. Or if you dont want them to know but still need support, maybe tell a friend or another relative that you trust.

You have lots of support here. Please use the forum to heal , vent and make new friends. Private message me anytime you want to talk. Your not alone.

Hiall

Post edited by: hiall, at: 04/17/2012 07:15 PM


04/17/2012 07:57 PM
Hailyn85
 
Posts: 5
New Member

Yes I'm safe now. Sometimes I see him around since it's a small town but I just keep my distance. He sometimes calls me but I just never pick up. I haven't talked to a counselor. I am scared to tell people so I don't know how to reach out for help. I have thought about telling my closest friend about it but every time I try to I just can't seem to form the words to tell her. I don't know why I'm so scared to tell people. I guess I'm just afraid of people not believing me.

04/17/2012 09:23 PM
Izzy87
Izzy87  
Posts: 2731
VIP Member

Welcome...I'm very sorry. I was assaulted twice by my boyfriend; even after I knew it was rape (I didn't know right away) I was very concerned that I wouldn't be believed. I found that my family was more supportive than I gave them credit for. Reaching out is definitively scary! Do you have any reason to think your parents won't believe you? Are they usually supportive and loving to you?

I get the impression you are young. You of course don't have to divulge any details, share as much and as little as you are comfortable with. But, if you are in school, you should be able to access the counselors there and they can keep your information confidential. Or, there is the RAINN hotline. They will believe you. We believe you too.


04/18/2012 06:03 AM
clemaire
clemaire  
Posts: 889
Senior Member

Welcome Hailn85. I'm so sorry for what happened. It's okay to take your time with all this. You will get a lot of support here. Can I ask when this last happened to you? You don't have to answer. I just want to make sure your okay physically. We are here for you and your not alone. I was raped by someone I trusted too. Feel free to PM me anytime.

clemaire


04/18/2012 11:46 AM
Hailyn85
 
Posts: 5
New Member

It's been about a year. Last happened last June. It happened a couple times before that too.

04/18/2012 01:39 PM
clemaire
clemaire  
Posts: 889
Senior Member

I'm so sorry hailyn85. It happened recently and it happened other times before that too. I really feel for you because I've been there too. It's even worse when it's someone you trusted. I was hurt by someone I trusted too. It's awful to think that someone you trust would treat you like that. I was almost in denial when I found out. I kept making excuses for him or I would blame myself. You have made a huge step by coming here and sharing. You don't even have to share. You can just as easily browse to see what others are facing and conquering.

You said you were in school. Do you mind if I ask you if your in high school or at a university? I'm just trying to understand where your at is all. High school can be very tough on a survivor. Remember that we're here for you and your safe here.

clemaire


04/18/2012 06:25 PM
Hailyn85
 
Posts: 5
New Member

I was in denial at first too. I didn't even realize it was rape at first. I think I was just in shock and I felt it was my fault. I am in high shool. I'm a senior this year but it happened last year when I wa a senior.

04/18/2012 08:21 PM
hiall
hiall  
Posts: 1881
VIP Member

What do you feel like doing Hailyn? I know my daughter felt way better after telling. Actually a friend of hers told us. Its like this huge weight was lifted off her shoulders. We were devastated when we found out but relieved at the same time.

04/18/2012 08:31 PM
Hailyn85
 
Posts: 5
New Member

I don't really want to tell my parents yet. I don't know why but I just don't want to. I do want to tell me friend tho but I don't know how to bring it up to her.
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