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Rape Forums › General & Support › I dont like the group header
01/31/2011 01:14 PM
Justanothergirl08
I dont agree with the group header that we are "victims" of rape...I am a SURVIVOR and plan to stay that way! If I think of myself as a "victim" I am going to be vulnerable again and I WONT let myself go there again...Ive come too far.

Theres my rant...I dont think anybody who has endured a rape is a victim they have survived and need to start seeing themselves that way!
Reply

01/31/2011 02:22 PM  Top
Frenchie
Frenchie
 
Posts: 1872
VIP Member
I am a survivor to...but only because I am alive. I was bleeding out for the 4 days I spent during my abduction.

I have been under care for three yrs. now...but still not coping that well. There are too many triggers that make me relive and very angry at the world...you see it on TV shows, News, and more pple are coming forward with their stories. Yes...I just did physically survive but I am still a victim....see...They took my ability to be intimate....I will never get that part back ..as far as a sexual relationship/ but I am trying to live.

I wish you continued success and the positive thinking is your healer.

{{{{{{ hugz to all}}}}}

Life is a mystery. It is a gift.
Don't dare miss even a moment of it.
Yesterday was a lesson, today is a prayer,
Tomorrow would mean nothing,
If I can't find you there !
**********************************************
I AM NOT CERTIFIED TO GIVE ADVICE ON PERSCRIPTION MEDICATION OR TO TELL A PATIENT WHAT TO DO FOR THEIR AILMENTS. HOWEVER AS A CAREGIVER AND YOUR FRIEND...I MAY TELL YOU WHAT MEDS I TAKE AND/OR WHAT I DO FOR THIS OR THAT AILMENT. IT'S ALWAYS BEST TO ASK YOUR DOCTOR, OR PHARMACIST FOR THE BEST AND SAFEST ADVICE!~be well~ and know that somebody cares! (( and in alot of cases: "been there-done that" )) My love, Frenchie

MEDICATIONS I TAKE FOR FIBROMYALGIA, BIPOLAR, ANXIETY, GERD, ADD, NARCOLEPSY and HIGH BP

LYRICA / 3 A DAY
GEODONE/ 2 A DAY
SEROQUEL XR / 1 AT BEDTIME
NUVIGIL / 2 A DAY
NEXIUM 1 A DAY
BUSPAR 15 MG / 4 A DAY
ZOLOFT / 1 A DAY
VERAPAMIL ( Calan ) / 240 / 1 A DAY

( by the way...for those dragging their wagon and beat on their feet...lost in a Fibro-Fog....
TRY " FOG-LIFTER" coffee by Millstone! *grin*)

01/31/2011 04:12 PM  Top
lovespeonies
lovespeonies
 
Posts: 4042
VIP Member
Justanothergirl I agree with you completely. I don't care for the way it is worded. We are survivors and we are strong. To me saying that I'm a victim means I am stuck there in that time and that I'm unable to move on. I am not trying to be insensitive, I know many people are stuck with their trauma. I wish we all could see ourselves as SURVIVORS.

01/31/2011 07:23 PM  Top
hiall
hiall
 
Posts: 1836
VIP Member
Some people dont like to be called anything. When i went to sexual abuse advocates class they teach not to label anyone victim or survivor. Most people dont like to be labeled. Personally, i think a person can be called a victim right after it happens. But shortly after that i would call them a survivor. I like to use survivor because i think its inspirational. If a person comes to the forum talking about there loved one and keeps calling them a victim, then i would suggest that they stop and start calling them a survivor. I think its a more positive way to think. I think you acually heal faster thinking your a survivor instead of a victim.
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02/02/2011 01:10 PM  Top
sarahnicole7
I don't even like the word, "Rape".. i can barely say it sometimes. Yes, i'm a survivor in some ways.. but I feel like a victim in other ways.. either way, it sucks and we're all getting through it piece by piece. Thanks for your input, and i'm glad you have such a great outlook on being a survivor!

02/02/2011 02:48 PM  Top
kcchiefette
kcchiefette
 
Posts: 184
Member
I don't believe to be a 'victim' either, but I don't think the title is there to offend anybody at all..

We have all survived.. let's be blessed that we have this place to vent and ask advice from others Smile

02/03/2011 12:00 AM  Top
Frenchie
Frenchie
 
Posts: 1872
VIP Member
ALL of you are right in your own way. thanks
{{{{{{ hugz to all}}}}}

Life is a mystery. It is a gift.
Don't dare miss even a moment of it.
Yesterday was a lesson, today is a prayer,
Tomorrow would mean nothing,
If I can't find you there !
**********************************************
I AM NOT CERTIFIED TO GIVE ADVICE ON PERSCRIPTION MEDICATION OR TO TELL A PATIENT WHAT TO DO FOR THEIR AILMENTS. HOWEVER AS A CAREGIVER AND YOUR FRIEND...I MAY TELL YOU WHAT MEDS I TAKE AND/OR WHAT I DO FOR THIS OR THAT AILMENT. IT'S ALWAYS BEST TO ASK YOUR DOCTOR, OR PHARMACIST FOR THE BEST AND SAFEST ADVICE!~be well~ and know that somebody cares! (( and in alot of cases: "been there-done that" )) My love, Frenchie

MEDICATIONS I TAKE FOR FIBROMYALGIA, BIPOLAR, ANXIETY, GERD, ADD, NARCOLEPSY and HIGH BP

LYRICA / 3 A DAY
GEODONE/ 2 A DAY
SEROQUEL XR / 1 AT BEDTIME
NUVIGIL / 2 A DAY
NEXIUM 1 A DAY
BUSPAR 15 MG / 4 A DAY
ZOLOFT / 1 A DAY
VERAPAMIL ( Calan ) / 240 / 1 A DAY

( by the way...for those dragging their wagon and beat on their feet...lost in a Fibro-Fog....
TRY " FOG-LIFTER" coffee by Millstone! *grin*)

03/08/2011 03:25 AM  Top
SomewhereInCalifornia
SomewhereInCalifornia
 
Posts: 356
Member
I'm an Advocate
I agree..... Although, it was not meant to make any of us feel trapped.........I wonder if we could get them to change the header from victim to survivor?
Reply

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