HUMOR FOR LEXOPHILES, LOVERS OF WORDS;

>

> HUMOR FOR LEXOPHILES, LOVERS OF WORDS;

>

> I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

>

> Police were called to a day care where a 3-yr-old was resisting

> a rest.

>

> Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?

> He's

> all right now.

>

> The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir

> Cumference.

>

> To write with a broken pencil is pointless.

>

> When fish are in schools, they sometimes take debate.

>

> The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was a small

> medium at large.

>

> A thief who stole a calendar got 12 months.

>

> A thief fell & broke his leg in wet cement. He became a hardened

> criminal.

>

> When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A.

>

> The dead batteries were given out free of charge.

>

> A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.

>

> A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.

>

> A will is a dead giveaway.

>

> Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.

>

> A backward poet writes inverse.

>

> In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's

> your Count that votes.

>

> A chicken crossing the road--- poultry in motion.

>

> If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.

>

> Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft & I'll show you

> A-flat miner..

>

> The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully

> recovered.

>

> A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France , resulted in

> Linoleum Blownapart.

>

> You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

>

> A calendar's days are numbered.

>

> A lot of money is tainted: 'Taint yours, and 'taint mine.

> ('Taint none of it mine lately!!)

>

> A boiled egg is hard to beat.

>

> He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

>

> Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the

> end.

>

> When you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.

>

> When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd

> dye.

>

> Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.

>

> Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.

>

> Acupuncture: a jab well done.

6/9/06 - biopsy positive for cancer
6/23/06 - DIAGNOSIS: stage IV (T4d N2 M1) invasive ductile carcinoma NOS with bone and liver mets; 17 cm mass (primary tumors), inflammatory breast cancer(IBC); HER2/neu+, HR-
6/26/06-12/11/06 - Chemo FEC/Taxol w/Herceptin & Aredia
12/20/06 - right modified radical mastectomy, 7 of 13 removed nodes showed evidence of prior disease
12/21/06 - No Evidence of Disease (stage IV/NED); complete remission
2/6/07-3/22/07-Radiation 28+5 boost, 6040cGy.
CURRENT: Still NED, taking Herceptin and Zometa without end. Heart and kidney function remains normal.

hugs

jessi

6/9/06 - biopsy positive for cancer
6/23/06 - DIAGNOSIS: stage IV (T4d N2 M1) invasive ductile carcinoma NOS with bone and liver mets; 17 cm mass (primary tumors), inflammatory breast cancer(IBC); HER2/neu+, HR-
6/26/06-12/11/06 - Chemo FEC/Taxol w/Herceptin & Aredia
12/20/06 - right modified radical mastectomy, 7 of 13 removed nodes showed evidence of prior disease
12/21/06 - No Evidence of Disease (stage IV/NED); complete remission
2/6/07-3/22/07-Radiation 28+5 boost, 6040cGy.
CURRENT: Still NED, taking Herceptin and Zometa without end. Heart and kidney function remains normal.

Post edited by: Suz, at: 07/11/2008 17:48

Like I said; sometimes I feel really guilty for being on it since I'm not bedridden or immoblie. But my treatment side effects and damage to my body/brain just doesn't make it feasible for me to hold down a

"normal" job. My hubby was teasing me the other day that I couldn't even sort the laundry without needing a day in bed and lots of pain meds. Then on the flip side I have days where I go swimming with the kids all day! I'm just glad and very blessed to have the "good days".

Hugs

Jessi

6/9/06 - biopsy positive for cancer
6/23/06 - DIAGNOSIS: stage IV (T4d N2 M1) invasive ductile carcinoma NOS with bone and liver mets; 17 cm mass (primary tumors), inflammatory breast cancer(IBC); HER2/neu+, HR-
6/26/06-12/11/06 - Chemo FEC/Taxol w/Herceptin & Aredia
12/20/06 - right modified radical mastectomy, 7 of 13 removed nodes showed evidence of prior disease
12/21/06 - No Evidence of Disease (stage IV/NED); complete remission
2/6/07-3/22/07-Radiation 28+5 boost, 6040cGy.
CURRENT: Still NED, taking Herceptin and Zometa without end. Heart and kidney function remains normal.

It amazes me that non-disabled people will show compassion and charity to others around the world, but can be so mean to the disabled right here in our own neighborhoods with invisible disabilies (and sometimes visable disabilities)--they haven't learned that disabilities can be visible and invisible, but both are just as disabling.

I have both visable and invisable disabilities and I have to use an electric scooter, but even I had an elderly man in the grocery store a while back that lacked tolerance for me because I wasn't getting my stuff out of the frozen foods section fast enough for him (its in the Disabled Articles, I wrote about it there). But a deceased disabled person wrote that eventually people either become disabled or die, so there's a 50 percent chance that some of these intolerant people may end up with our ailments and our struggles.

FOR SOME REASON, THE SOFTWARE IS TAKING THE LETTERS SSD AND PUTTING THEM IN BLUE AND UNDERLINING THEM AND LINKING THEM TO SOME CREME. I ALERTED ROY AND ASKED IF HE COULD DO ANYTHING.

Post edited by: Suz, at: 07/14/2008 10:59

Post edited by: Suz, at: 07/14/2008 11:07

I've had a lot of people question why I was on SSD (I think they see it for people who are immobile; but then when they see the long periods I go through of extreme pain they start to get it (or the chemo brain, good thing I generally have a good sense of humor about it; except with hubby; I'm really touchy with him about it for some reason...). Thankfully I have a wonderful support group, that helps me out so much!

hugs

jessi

Post edited by: jessicaharris9, at: 07/14/2008 14:39

6/9/06 - biopsy positive for cancer
6/23/06 - DIAGNOSIS: stage IV (T4d N2 M1) invasive ductile carcinoma NOS with bone and liver mets; 17 cm mass (primary tumors), inflammatory breast cancer(IBC); HER2/neu+, HR-
6/26/06-12/11/06 - Chemo FEC/Taxol w/Herceptin & Aredia
12/20/06 - right modified radical mastectomy, 7 of 13 removed nodes showed evidence of prior disease
12/21/06 - No Evidence of Disease (stage IV/NED); complete remission
2/6/07-3/22/07-Radiation 28+5 boost, 6040cGy.
CURRENT: Still NED, taking Herceptin and Zometa without end. Heart and kidney function remains normal.

Jessi, I've often talked to my male cat and said that when me and my two cats eventally rule the world, things will be different. We'll tackle SSD, ADA, carpeted cat furniture for all cats, and more.

Post edited by: Suz, at: 07/14/2008 18:36

Kevin wants to get another cat to be a "mouser" since we had rodent problems last year. The only problem was neither of our cats (both front declawed) were getting the mice; the dog was getting the mice (and birds, squirrels and working on rabbits).

Chemo has made me allergic to my furry friends; so while I won't get rid of my little baby; once she is gone we won't be getting any more. Its a shame; I love animals so much - but everyone in my family has them so we will go visit those!

Hugs

Jessi

OH, surgeons office called today; the lump in my left breast (we already knew not cancer) is fibrocystic disease. So sounds like it's not going away; put the put a marker in there so I'm guessing as long as no changes they won't need to do andditional biospies!

6/9/06 - biopsy positive for cancer
6/23/06 - DIAGNOSIS: stage IV (T4d N2 M1) invasive ductile carcinoma NOS with bone and liver mets; 17 cm mass (primary tumors), inflammatory breast cancer(IBC); HER2/neu+, HR-
6/26/06-12/11/06 - Chemo FEC/Taxol w/Herceptin & Aredia
12/20/06 - right modified radical mastectomy, 7 of 13 removed nodes showed evidence of prior disease
12/21/06 - No Evidence of Disease (stage IV/NED); complete remission
2/6/07-3/22/07-Radiation 28+5 boost, 6040cGy.
CURRENT: Still NED, taking Herceptin and Zometa without end. Heart and kidney function remains normal.