Parents of Bipolar Children Support Group

Does any one else have the problem of needing to have a job but cant get one because of your bp child? I used o work all the time but when I left their dad I was pregnant and made it to 8 months before I had to go on bed rest, then the baby was born with developmental delays (she si 100% better now) but after that I found that it is really difficult to get a job where it doesn't affect her. I have tried a few times in the last couple of years and it just blows up in my face. My daughter just gets worse while I am gone, sseems to cycle more and more. Plus then the anxiety really kicks up a bunch of notches. I need a job but I don'tt know what to do with her to make where I can get one. Any suggestions? Thanks Becky

I have the same problem yes...everytime i would start a new job or try to go to school she would end up getting herself suspended from school or "sick" and couldnt go...yes, its really tough...i got lucky because my mom retired and can handle her for a few hours (so far). do you have any family or support system that can help you out.

No I don't really have anyone that can help. My husband works and I try to work around his schedule but he swings every 2 months which makes i almost impossible. I figured out I have to work straight days which is hard in my area, everything is on seniority here. Plus I would have to make enough to pay for my kids to go somewhere including the bp one who is 13 but still cant stay alone. My parents are both retired but they like their life the way it is, they arent those kind of grandparents. They can handle her but not for long periods of time and they just plain dont want to. Which I understand. We have a boys and girls club where they could all go butt it costs money and it is only in the daytime. So most jobs here start out at $8-$10 an hour and you have to go through a manpower type company at first. Manpower likes to give you a job that lasts for maybe 2 days then nothing then another couple of days before they give you a steady one. And with only 8 or 10 it isnt enough to pay for my kids to go and make any money at all, I would just make enough to pay someone else to watch my kids.So it sucks but I am gong to keep working at it. I am glad your mother is able to help you. I am sure it is a huge relief! Becky

Its hard with such an unpredictable illness.My daughter just turned 19 she cant keep a job because shes so unstable she is on meds sees all her Drs and therapist and in and out hospital.She had little apt and a job lost both because her problems.She couldnt keep job when she was younger either same issues.We dont know from hour to the next how she will be.Stress from work also triggered her so badly and made things worse for the most.Shes back home now and she has tried zillion places shes had several interviews I think her past record jobs stops her but with no expierence no interview she tried to explain to a few and even the burger joints now have Mental evaluation pages to fill out on anger,stress,mental health ec...I cant believe some things on min. wage job applications now.

xceldanes, has she tried to get disibility? My daughter gets death benefits from her dad passing but they have already told me how to get her disabilty when she is older. Were you able to work when she was younger? Not to be nosy lol but to know if you did how did you do it? Becky

frustatedb We are fighting for disability on her now shes all stressed out because she has to see one their pdrs Monday if shes out of hospital by then.

I was blessed my husband and I both ran my dads business and live on the farm as well my dad passed away few years ago Id opened a store in town but because daughter when lease was up I closed store and just went to deliveries only so its on my own schedule it sucks because not much money but we live.My husband almost died 2 years ago and hes disabled now so with him and her things are tight.

Disability turned her down said he has all these conditions and they are under their list BUT shes young and can function IF they only knew they havent a clue we filed for a reconcideration I sent past 2 hospitalizations in and her outburst in town thats gotten her in trouble and all new meds etc....I got letter Sat she has appt with one of their Drs Monday so shes all worreid and upset about that.

Can you message me some tips??

I started disability when she was 16 then she wanted to try to work so when she was turned down we didnt pursue it BUt when all that made matters worse trying to work after year of hell and 2 lost jobs and evicted from her apartment and all hospitals etc...I refiled last Oct they turned down in April now the the reconsider Ive been told by most that will probably be turned down too Ill have to get lawyer and wait up to 2 years on a hearing with judge not sure never done this before ANY HELP tips appreciated

I applied for disabilty for my daughter when she was 5, they sent her to one of their pdocs who saw us for 5 min (yes I did say 5 min!!!!) He was supposed to do an evaluation to determine if she needed it. He sid she was fine. So we were turned down. I was going to appeal but her father died in the mean time and we got death benefits for herr and her brother. So I dropped it at the time, I recently went back in to ask if she would even qualify with getting death benefits and they said no. But I spoke with a women years ago who said when she is about 17 I needed to go through the process again and by the time she is 18 we should be able to continue gettng her benefits just under the disablity instead of death benefit. Sorry thsi was so long and I hope something of it helps you. I have been told multiple times that they alwasy turn down first time but on the second or third you can get it. I hope things starting gong better for you! I imagine it is tight. I am lucky in that my husband works, he gets about 14 and hour and most weeks we can manage to get a little ot and I have he check which is the same as a part time job but it isnt enough either. Becky

My grandson got approved in approximately six months. We did not go through an attorney. I got the basic info from a book I bought whicn helped me break down the different parts of his diagnosis which was BP 1 with psychotic features. During the examination my grandson cited examples of his actual symptoms which were in line with his diagnosis. He stated exactly what he did when his OCD kicked in. He discussed exactly what happened when he was anxious. He described specific examples regarding his depression-what suicidal thoughts went on and what went on with his paranoia and the psychotic thoughts he had along with having rage attacks and what he did-kicking things, swearing and yelling for hours. He was initially asked if he knew why he was seeing an examining psychiatrist and he started in with his symptoms.

I suggest you perhaps see if you can find a book describing methods of obtaining SSI and read carefully the descriptions of Bipolar and perhaps ask you daughter to see what examples fit her. The book I bought was very simple. Mainly stating how long depression lasted and was the person not able to function-this kind of thing Unfortunately I do not have the book I bought or remember the title. It might have been one of those Dummy books-like Computer Operations for Dummies.

The examples your daughter gives must clearly state an inability to work if this fits. Tell her NOT to state she has been looking for work ,but has not been hired. They can look at it as she should keep trying. I think their view is that if you want to work and try to find work they will disqualify.

I spoke to my grandson's investigator as I had been his legal guardian as his mother also has BP. The investigator told me about the strange answers on the mental status exam like answering -How are oranges and apples alike and saying they both have seeds. This and his relating how his symptoms effected an inability to work with a bipolar diagnosis is what convinced the examiner to rule in his favor.

I hope this is not too much info.

I am so sorry you are going through this. Do not give up on this. My prayers are with you.

Post edited by: Marlynn, at: 06/05/2012 10:30 PM

This is very helpful, thank you. I applied last year for him but never accomplished anything yet

I think the other book I was referring to is *SSI for Dummies*. the BP book is great. My grandson is really into computers and thoroughly researched his diagnosis. This really helped with the med compliance.