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06/25/2011 09:39 AM

Tattoos, Body piercing, and Tanning

owutatangledweb
owutatangledwebPosts: 2771
Senior Member

So what is it with these things and BP disorder? I wanted to add "hair coloring" but I think I already have that one figured out with my daughter. She died it black when she was on the depressive side, highlighted or colored it blonde when she was on the manic side, and now that she's even.... has a combination of both.

But, I can't figure out the tats, piercings, and tanning. She did tan more when she was both depressive and manic and doesn't seem too overboard with that right now.

However, every time she has some money in her pocket (which she shouldn't if she's saving money for her tuition; which she is NOT), she wants to get a tattoo or body piercing. We argued about it on the phone yesterday. She just got her paycheck, came home last night after I was asleep, and I'm afraid to go upstairs and see if there is a hole in her lip! And, her dad gets home tonight after being gone for over ten days. He'll flip. I think I need another rap song.

Put a hole in yur lip

Yur daddy will flip

Money all gone

Mama say bye-bye to the college "trip"

Hanging with the dude with the snakebite lips

A deja vu of the Stormpisser morphing "trips".

Mama say what happened to yur beautiful swan?

Can't wait to see when your Daddy rips...

I think maybe I'll arrange to not be here when daddy gets home... I've had enough this week.

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06/25/2011 11:04 AM
clearthinker
clearthinker  
Posts: 998
Senior Member

Owutagangledweb , Your post makes me smile and sad at the same time. We must be talking about the same daughter. There are some people that can wear tattoos and on others they look bad. Some people look ok with their nose pierced and others do it but it does not go with their personalities. One of the girls that my daughter went through elementary and high school with had tattooed 85% of her body and pierced anything and everything that could be pierced. Her mother was a very strict Baptist woman and this grieved her to death, meaning she really did die. She could not get a grip with this destructive self mutilation and body graffiti and she died from a broken heart. So when my daughter pierced her belly button and nose and did all kinds of funky stuff with her hair it grieved me but I had to put things into perspective. I'm grateful that my daughter did not have a bunch of tattoos, only because she hates needles so much. My daughter spent $400 to get her hair real straight and then the chemical burned her hair, she then got a perm and colored it blonde and and a bunch of other colors each week until it almost fell out. She had to get it cut real short and still would not leave it alone. My words to her are 'Please make peace with your hair'. Then she started pulling it out and had bald spots. My daughter has the most beautiful color and texture of hair and it makes me so sad to see her destroy it. For the past couple of years she has become better about this. She still puts color in it and it ruins her beautiful natural hair and gives it that old dried out look and I think it ages her. I have to believe this is part of the bipolar, my daughter's aunt, my husbands sister is the same way about her hair. She has beautiful natural hair but constantly does things that destroy it. I think it's part that they want to change and thinking if they change their hair it will change them. As hard as it is to watch a person mutilate themselves we have to realize it's their body. It is so hard to watch your own child do these things. I thank God I finally talked my daughter out of the tanning booths. She went for years.

06/25/2011 11:54 AM
gardengirl
gardengirl  
Posts: 1727
Senior Member

I teach high school kids -- the tats and piercings are becoming more and more a part of their culture. I don't see it as exclusive to BP, but maybe they are quicker to try it sometimes...

That being said: I hate it with a passion!! Both of my daughters (with and without BP) have tattoos and some (fortunately minor) piercing. I see students of mine with it, and I literally shudder which is probably what they want to see, but I can't help it. They'll ask me what I think, and I'll tell them: "I think the same thing that I think when my own daughters asked me that about their tattoos or piercings -- sure would not do it and I think they'll regret it some day." (Truly sad, though, are the kids who get that done and their own parents don't notice it! Seems to defeat the purpose of it...)

What I really and truly cannot stand to see is when kids "gauge" their ears. -- Why have huge holes in your earlobes?! donotgetitdonotgetitdonotgetit

Of course, neither one of my kids tried to do anything more than double ear piercing until after they turned 18 and could then do so without my permission. I'm just glad that they both have listened to me enough to realize that some "older" people will never understand it, so they have them in places that would not show during a job interview!

They have both done the hair color thing too. My younger daughter worked on a cosmetology license in high school (along with academic courses) so at least she knows what she is doing. Both of them have decided to go back to their natural color now -- although the most outlandish that it ever got was my BP daughter having purple highlights in black hair.

Then again, my parents hated the fact that I prefered blue jeans to anything else (and still do!)... so maybe it's a generational thing?

*climbing off soapbox now*


06/25/2011 08:34 PM
owutatangledweb
owutatangledwebPosts: 2771
Senior Member

I just don't know. I sometimes think "It's a different day and age and maybe I'm too much of a prude". But then, my younger daughter despises all of these things...won't even highlight her hair! The girls she hangs out with are so different. None of them are interested in these things. I see plenty of other young people that don't do all of these things. I get what you're saying about high school GG, but I just don't know. I've been to the borderline personality sites and they all talk about tats and piercings...like a self-harm type thing. Just bothers me.....

As an update, no pierced lip. BUT, I'm wondering what's under her clothes. According to a social network site, "Snakebites" pierced his (I hate to say it here) nipples. OUCH! I j-u-s-t d-o-n-t get it. ***still shaking head***


06/25/2011 08:56 PM
jbsmom
jbsmom  
Posts: 1291
Senior Member

Love the rap, Owut...CT-love the "make peace with your hair" comment. Both hilarious!

My son has assured me he is getting a tattoo as soon as he turns 18. If the permission thing is a matter of a signature-he's got my signature down pat. Maybe he's got a few already. In reality, my son hates pain at any extreme. He likes to point out every bruise or cut on his body - like I'm going to panic about that. I have taken him to the ER for what turned out to be a sore muscle before. UGH! I thought he was going to die! He is the boy who cried wolf--it will probably burn me one day!


06/27/2011 07:10 AM
gardengirl
gardengirl  
Posts: 1727
Senior Member

Most kids don't have tattoos -- many are fascinated by them. Like you, I don't wanna know about the piercings that I cannot see!

I do have a friend whose niece had her belly button pierced -- it did all kinds of weird things when she got pregnant... I tell the kids that one and they all go "EWWWWW!"


06/28/2011 01:55 PM
cigarinface
cigarinface  
Posts: 86
Member

I asked my BP daughter why she pierces (and yes, she has one tattoo). She said the pain makes the pain in her heart go away. She can concentrate on the physical pain. She said it's like cutting, but with decorations. She has guages in her ears (she did them herself), she has had two lip pierces, a tongue piercing, and she has pierced her own belly button six times. All the piercings are gone now. She just has the guages and tattoo, but she says she still craves the pain. I don't know how she can handle that much pain. Makes me want to faint just thinking about it.

06/28/2011 02:30 PM
owutatangledweb
owutatangledwebPosts: 2771
Senior Member

I think I'm just gonna ask my daughter straight up whether she does it because of the pain. Thanks cigarinface!

07/01/2011 01:05 PM
Love4addy
Posts: 17
New Member

I am not bipolar, but i do have a bipolar daughter...But i do have a tattoo, a small butterfly no bigger than a quarter on my foot. (its on the foot, i thought as i grow old and wrinkly that the tat would not sag so bad!!!...lol), anyways, lol...while getting the tattoo...it was a total rush for me...i felt no pain, it was almost like every tiny needle was pure adrenaline for me, i automatically thought give me another one!...needless to say i have not had another one, but i have spoke to other people and they have xperienced the drug adrenaline effect as well!

And yes my daughter (with BP) has a small tat around her so called bikini line!

Did it one nite while on a rush, i did not find out about it until we had to check her in a treatment center and they did a body search!

They are sneaky and very persistent!


07/04/2011 10:23 AM
owutatangledweb
owutatangledwebPosts: 2771
Senior Member

We're up to three tats already (all in places that aren't visible until she wears a bikini! Body piercing, we were at two in addition to ear piercings. I don't believe she got one this week (unless it's hidden). She had wanted to do her lip and didn't, so I'm just praying she did nothing else..........

I still need to ask her about the pain.

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