Parental Alienation Syndrome Support Group

Dear PAS supporters,

How do you overcome the pain and sadness during the holidays?

I've been to my friends' during the holidays and feel a dagger in my heart when I see families getting together and I know my son refuses any contact with me. I've already tried getting involved in charities.

Welcome to the PAS group. I am glad you are here. Well I don't know if it is right or wrong but this is how I live through the pain of knowing my son does not want anything to do with me. my son has been alienated against me by his older brother ,my oldest son,and also from what I did in the past. So I take full responsibility for this. However ,I still understand the pain of having a child not wanting anything to do with you. He started talking to me and having me in his life and then his brother started filling his head with crap and gave him an ultimatum,him or me.So I missed his high school graduation and his wedding. I am suppose to understand,I don't.

When I go to my friends houses and see them all together ,I try to enjoy their moments together,like I am stealing them. Sad but true. I try and live in the present and not in the past. I don't think about what I am missing,but what I have and then I appreciate my life and the love around me. I cry sometimes cause I wish my youngest son would let me be apart of his life but I just HOPE and trust in God and so far God has never let me down ,so I get excited with that hope. I am happy for the friends that have their kids in their lives and the love and happiness they are suppose to have. I get sad for what my son is missing out on with me and that he doesn't realize it,but I trust in God that in my life time I will be back in my son's life one day. So now I have to life life to the fullest,that is what God wants me to do. I do noone any good to stay in sadness and depression all the time. my son wouldn't want to come to a mother like that. At my friends or watching a show and i started getting the tears in my eyes ,I talk to myself and remind my self of why I am grateful. I do alot of self-talking during the holidays,but it is ok I get thru them. This year I cried alot the week before them ,and prayed a whole bunch and you know what ,Christmas eve I laughed and wore reindeer antlers and was with friends,and listened to music and then Christmas day I cooked and was with a friend and and a very nice day. God is good . Life is good. I received a picture and a Christmas card from my son in the mail. There is HOPE after all!!!!! I got the best Christmas gift of all. God heard my prayers.

May God relieve your pain this new year and surround you with love. You are not alone. We are here for you!!!!!!

Kris

Hi Antonio's mom. The Holidays just suck. (sorry). I loved Christmas until I got married. Last year, I took some sleep aids and slept throug the day, pretended it didn't exist. I wouldn't recommend that but I couldn't stand it. This year was a little better in one way, worse in another. It's the 3rd year my 15 year old son won't have contact with me. I don't know if you are Christian or not, but focusing on the true meaning and not what man has made it into may help. At least it's Dec. 26th now. I will work to establish contact with my son for another year. Kay. targetmom

Thanks Kris, Thanks for your kind words and support,

Carmen