Miscarriage Support Group

Hi ladies - my baby would have been due on the 3rd of October and I have been in tears for the last few weeks over it. My husband doesnt know what to say and I dont talk to my mother about it cos she thinks I should just get on with it! I was doing quite well - I felt sad naturally enough but nothing like the heart break I'm feeling now! I dont know why its taken me so long to feel this way. I miscarried last February! I guess I had hoped to be pregnant by now but in all honesty I have not been eating healthily and I've started smoking again over the last few months. I cant seem to pull myself together enough to overhaul my diet to give me the best chance to conceive! Any ideas or tips would be most welcome!

Ava,

I am so sorry you are going through this I know how it feels when the deaths of my children come up I have a tradition of writing them a letter and attaching it to a ballon and let it go on the day. For me this helps its like im sending my baby a message to heaven and it is comforting. Just know what you are feeling is normal people who say just get over it never felt the loss and devistation we feel. Im here if you ever want to talk.

hugs mary

Hi Mary thanks for your reply. I hope you're doing well. I've made an apt to get a tattoo done next week - its a baby sleeping with wings around it. I will post a pic when I get it done if you'd like to see it. I really feel it will give me some closure. Thats a lovely idea of writing a letter and attaching it to a balloon - I might try that too. (((HUGS)))

Ava,

I love the idea of the tattoo also I have my kids name tattooed on my and it is so special to me. I also release ballons on my moms bday and the day she died it just makes me feel better. I cant wait to see the tattoo im getting my moms name with angel wings on me next week in rememberence of her.

Hugs mary

Hi Mary - I'm feeling so upset again today. Does the sadness ever go away? Its over whelming and I'm scared it will drag me down again.

Did you get your new tattoo yet? I'm getting mine on Friday.

Ava,

I am so sorry you are feeling so overwhelmed. It does get better that I, It just takes a while. Im here if you want to talk okay just pm me anytime.

No I didnt get the tattoo yet my pain level for the past has been so bad I just couldnt get myself to leave my house. I had a long weekend a two weekends ago and it took a toll on me so I a set up my tattoo for this week if I can get the pain under control. My brother wants a tat to so we gonna go together so that will be nice.

Hugs Mary

I'm sorry to hear you have been in pain sweetie. Are you using your wheel chair a lot? It certainly puts my worries in perspective. I have reduced my antidepressant in the last month and I'm wondering if it was a bad idea. I would really love it if I didnt need them as the side effects really are bothersome!

I suppose I thought that the MC would not be so upsetting 7 months later! Hopefully once his due date has come and gone I wont feel so bad. Thanks for replying to me - it means a lot to have somebody to talk to. X

Im always here for you if you ever want to talk I know how hard it is. Ya im using my chair but a couple weekends ago they had a bbq at my bio mothers house to get the family together. First I dont talk to my bio mother and dont go over there and one of the family members I dont talk to his lifestyle i dont really like to be around. Well with my bio family they invite me to do the cooking so I ended up making 3 turkey trays full of food. One macaroni salad, one potato salad and one chinese rice so I was already wore out from all the cooking then when I got there I was told what to do by my bio mother so I just left but it was just to much on me. I only went at the request of my little brother who im so close to and he is the only one in the family that is really there for me and cares about me and there is 11 kids in my bio family 10 left. He is the only one that will take me places and always makes sure im okay so when he asked me I couldnt turn him down.

hugs mary

Im always here for you if you ever want to talk I know how hard it is. Ya im using my chair but a couple weekends ago they had a bbq at my bio mothers house to get the family together. First I dont talk to my bio mother and dont go over there and one of the family members I dont talk to his lifestyle i dont really like to be around. Well with my bio family they invite me to do the cooking so I ended up making 3 turkey trays full of food. One macaroni salad, one potato salad and one chinese rice so I was already wore out from all the cooking then when I got there I was told what to do by my bio mother so I just left but it was just to much on me. I only went at the request of my little brother who im so close to and he is the only one in the family that is really there for me and cares about me and there is 11 kids in my bio family 10 left. He is the only one that will take me places and always makes sure im okay so when he asked me I couldnt turn him down.

hugs mary

Families can be such hard work Mary and it sounds as if yours dont appreciate you too much.At least you have your little brother onside. Perhaps you can just explain to him the next time that although you'd like to be able to do anything for him, visiting your family takes its toll on your health. He sounds like a lovely guy so I'm sure he will understand. I hope you are feeling better today pet. XXX