Miscarriage Support Group

I'm new to MDJunction and am amazed at how many support groups there are. I have been pregnant three times before. I am a teenage girl, and have miscarried all three pregnancies.

The first time I had sex at will, and became pregnant. I had used a condom and it had broken. The pregnancy lasted about 6 weeks and I was devistated. Of course I had never hoped to become a teen mother, but I had loved my baby from the moment I had found out about his/her existance.

The second time I was date raped and became pregnant. I hated the man who had done this to me and was so conflicted about what to do once I had found out. I quickly came to terms with my situation and had decided that I would raise my child alone and be strong. I was just at the close of my first trimester when it had happened again. I was thrown into deep depression and self hate. It was my fault. Something was wrong with me that this was happening.

Time went on, but I was never fully healed. There wasn't a day that went by that I didn't think about my babies. I still continued to live my life though, and tried to move on from all that had happened to me. I met the love of my life, and opened up to him about what had happened. We grew closer and deeper into love. I wanted to live my normal happy life again. I got back on the pill, and made sure all precautions would be taken before becoming sexually active once more. It wasn't until the third time we had made love that I became pregnant with our child. My pregnacy lasted only 8 short weeks and I had misscarried.

I'm still not over it. This last miscarriage was only 3 short months ago. I'm so afraid that something is wrong with my body though.

Three miscarriages? Is my body just not fully developed? I'm so afraid.

I want to have children. I'm a very maternal person, I'm just afraid that I'll never be able to give my fiance children when we're married.

Does anyone have any advice or a similar story they can share for support?

Chloe

First off welcome to the group, I am sorry you had to find us this way. I understand how you are feeling and the questions you have, I was 14 when I was pregnant with my first child who I had full term and then after birth she passed away then I had my second child who came out weighing 3 pds, After her I was again pregnant and our son who was also full termed died after birth, I was so devisitated they said I would never be able to have children again well 6 wks later I was pregnant with my 4th child a boy me and my husband were so happy he was early but okay. After I had him I had 11 miscarriages back to back lost 4 sets of twins. I know all the questions you ask the why me, will I ever be able to have children, will this happen again, all I can tell you is there is no answer why some of us lose our children for me the only thing I could do was stop blaming myself as hard as that was and to relax. Im here if you ever want to talk I been through so much in my life and love to help others so feel free to im me anytime.

mary

My advice would be to see a gynecologist, especially one that specializes in infertility. There are some tests that can be done to see what might be causing you to miscarry. You are young, and I am guessing otherwise healthy, so it may be a hormone imbalance, or it may be something that can be surgically repaired. If you don't like your first gynecologist, keep looking. Nearly all of these specialists went into this field because they want to help women have healthy babies. My doctor tried every test and medication to try and help me have a baby, and he cried with me when I lost my last pregnancy. He is still my gynecologist over 20 years later.

I inherited several birth defects from my father's family that I did not know about until I tried to have a baby; no one knew then that one defect might be related to being unable to carry a pregnancy. Unfortunately, I could not have a child of my own. Fortunately, my sister did not have the same birth defects, and she has a BEAUTIFUL, healthy 15 year old daughter that I am allowed to spoil to my heart's content.

Keep talking to the group. I know it is hard right now, and we are here to support you.

Hugs, Cat