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Hi everyone, I'm not sure if this is where I should be, but I don't know who else to vent to...I have been with my boyfriend for 8 months now and I've recently become consumed with thinking about his pot usage. He has been smoking a few times a week (that he admits) for almost 10 years now. I am a very once-in-a-while smoker, as in a few times a year. I never had a problem with him smoking until a few months ago when he mentioned he really wants to stop. I was so proud and ignorantly believed it was that easy. It worries me that he can't seem to stop something that he says he wants to. He says he still smokes weekly, but is happy that more days pass in between smoking than ever before. I am trying to be supportive and don't want to hound him on this for fear that it will make things worse. I want him to quit for him, not for me. And I'm afraid if he knows how much it's bothering me, he will just start lying to me. He doesn't necessarily think he's "addicted", but agrees that it is a habit. He says that he smokes to calm his thoughts. He is a very deep and analytical thinker and feels that it is the only escape. This sounds like a dependency to me... He never smokes around me and it is not directly affecting our relationship right now. However, lately I can't seem to stop thinking about how I am worried that he may never be able to stop smoking. He wants to be married and have children in the next few years and I just can't imagine myself marrying and raising kids with someone who smokes. He has gone from "I'm quitting" to "As long as it's only once a week" to "As long as it's slightly less than what I did before". Our relationship is amazing besides this one thing and I just can't decide if I should end things now before I end up married to an addict, or if I should stick it out and support him and see what happens. Sorry this is so long. Thank you for reading  |
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