Marijuana Addiction Support Group

But he's been a smoker for 15 years- it's all he's ever done. I don't think he even knows who the sober, adult him is. He may never have even met that person. Maybe I never met him either.

I never smoked until we hooked up. I started smoking out of curiosity but quickly realized that he always chose to spend time with his weed rather than with me. So I smoked to be with him.

He never missed sex once he had weed. So I started bringing the smoking into the bedroom.

We've made a series of bad career and financial decisions in the past two years- mainly due to marijuana-induced laziness. In the last two years of our marriage, we spent every cent that we saved in the first three years. All on Marijuana.

We no longer have dreams and the resulting depression just makes the marijuana more appealing.

I'm doing terribly in school and every attempt I make at bettering our lives fails because Marijuana makes me unambitious, lazy, a poor planner and a horrible executor of plans.

Is this how it will always be?

I don't want to bring children into this.

But I so want children.

So much.

I love my husband and I know he's a good man and he treats me well (in an immediate day-to-day sense, not in the providing for me like a responsible man sense) And I know I'll never find someone more perfect for me. I'll never be happier with anyone else. No one will ever know me as much as he does.

If I leave, my heart will never be as happy.

If I stay I'll never have any worldly comforts...

...and I'll always know that I'm the #2 thing in the life of the person who's the #1 thing in my life.

I wish I had the strength to do more than just threaten leaving. But my aim isn't to hurt him or to end this. it's just to get us to stop the weed.

I wish i had the strength to end the weed, but it helps calm both my worrying mind and my hurting heart.

I know you guys don't have the answers. But is there anything you can tell me? Anything to give me strength?

Lilly