I'm new to this group. (well, duh.) I've come looking for a little support. My partner of 2 1/2 years was diagnosed with late stage Lyme disease a little over a year ago. He thinks he's had it for 20 years now. Perhaps it's selfish of me, but I've been having a tough time dealing with it, especially after he got put on the IV meds (he now has a PassPort). I'm alternately angry, resentful, sad, and feeling a little left out. He forgets things a lot, and it's so hard to separate what he didn't hear or ignored from what LD makes him forget. It's hard to be the person who provides a lot of support without being able to understand exactly what he's going through myself. I've been having a really hard time with the "I redid my will" and "I doubt I will ever have kids" comments as well. So, I came to see if there was anyone else in the same boat, or if there was any great advice to be had in coping with this.

-AR

I think it's great that you are so honest VEtnurse.

It must be really tough to watch someone you love so much suffer. It can also be very hard to understand the depth of the pain and suffering unless you are a sufferer yourself. However, our uninfected partners go through their own kind of suffering, too. They have to pick up the slack. Life isn't always easy....the hard times bring a new appreciation for the good times.

I want you to know that people can and do get better from Lyme. My husband stood by me and supported me like a real champ. It was worth it. I'm better. It wasn't easy, but he knew I was still 'in there somewhere.'

So, hang in there. You can get your partner back.

To all those who stand by your sick one: A BIG THANK YOU!!!

Peace,

Connie

The one good thing about forgetting everything. This may be the ONLY time in our relationship I get to be right. He forgets what he's said or done, so when I remember, and he argues with me, I get to tell him that he's gone off the deep end. The gallows humor of chronic LD.

Thank you for helping me see things from my husband's point of view. He's said hurtful things like "I'm going to die and your not even going to remember who I was and you're all I have." The all I have part wasn't hurtful, but he's right. The scary thing for me is that all along I thought I had worsening fibromyalgia only to find out that I have late stage lyme disease which explains ALOT. It's tough on both of us. I can't imagine what he must go through, and I think he'd admit that he can't imagine what I go through. Hang tough and DO keep a positive attitude. I've been doing alot of reading on this since recently diagnosed and read MANY, MANY horror stories and that there is no cure. I don't believe it. Read my post under general about "Is there actually a cure?" because I got some positive feedback from that that gave me hope and should for you too since the ones we love affect us the most.

Thanks for joining the group. Keep posting!

Wolfpack

*♥´¨)
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(¸.•´ ; (¸ ;.♥•Wolfpack♥



COMMITMENT: "True commitment begins when we reach the point of not knowing how we can possibly go on, and decide to do it anyway."

The gray ribbon is to honor my husband's fight with a brain tumor and his ongoing courage to keep his hope and faith so brilliant!

UNDER OUR SKIN VIDEO TRAILER ABOUT LYME DISEASE
WARNING: May contain disturbing content to some
www.youtube.com/watch?v=sxWgS0XLVqw

I have read all sorts of theory's and stories but I have to focus on the positive once. We have not seen much or any improvment and he has been on meds since end of Feb 08 but we have HOPE!!! Doctor say's they just need to find the right combo of meds that works best for him. So good luck and keep thinking positive.

Feeling really positive this morning- it's my Friday, J seems to be in a good mood/spot, we're seeing improvement, so I'm sending light and positive energy to you all!

AR

I really appreciate your post. It's really hard for me to see it from the other side. I'm still trying to get an accurate diagnosis, but I believe I have Lyme. I've been diagnosed with fibro/CFS, but my worsening symptoms suggest Lyme. It's very difficult for those of us who suffer to bow to our partners and ask for help, for fear of being treated as weak. It's hard to be the cause of financial hardship as well. We want to be loved, but not pitied.

So it's hard to see the hardship that we cause for you, on the other side, too. We want to be strong so that you don't have to pull all the load on the relationship, and it's even harder when we come into the relationship relatively healthy.

There are days when I think both my husband and I go to bed and cry, but we hide it.

My point is really that none of us are alone, you aren't alone as a partner to someone who's ill, and those of us who are ill aren't alone, either. We all need to learn how to reach out more and try to work together, because it's only together that we can be a full partnership. A parnership works off of give and take, and it's only by giving and taking that we can be a full partnership, right?

I think that you have opened my eyes to what my husband deals with with me on a daily basis, tho. So thank you for that. I must be a royal PITA! I really need to remember your post and keep it in mind when I start to get frustrated about the fact that I can't remember a word or a phrase, or when I am hurting or I can't feel my fingers...just reaching out to him would probably be the smartest thing I can do, huh?

Thanks,

Jen