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12/02/2009 04:35 PM

just so down

jaime1978
jaime1978  
Posts: 2399
VIP Member
I'm an Advocate

I know many of you think of me as little miss positve attitude, always a word of encouragment, but truth is, I have my very dark and low times too.

The past few months have been increadibly stressfull in many ways, and it's caught up to me. I've been a sea of tears all day.... hub usually works from home...well, I made homemade spagetti and as you would all know, that's a real take on when you feel like crud. So 4pm comes and he gets called into work to fix a computer server...because HE"S THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN DO ANYTHING THERE! He won't be home until I'm guessing midnight, and this was just the icing on the cake..I was down all day, crying on his shoulder half the day, Just things like "i can't do this anymore, why won't God just heal me, I'm so stressed I don't know which way is up anymore"

So I have half the mind of calling his boss and demanding he give my husband a raise, and threaten him with legal action while I'm at it. My hub is salary, BUT he is legally entitled to time and a half, unless you are a manager that doesn't hold true...so legally he should at least be making time and a half. And I'd love to know why there are so many computer programers there earning what he is when THEY CAN"T DO ANYTHING...why is it him always getting called, heck they even call about their home pc's , think he gets extra pay for that? nope. I just talked to him twice, it's 7:30 here, I'm not expecting home anytime before midnight...what crap.

trying to get the kids in bed on my own is insaine,we have a routine, and it's totally messed up..

tomorrow will be so much better, he's going to a concert with his best friend....

so I'm gonna allow myself to wallow in my lousy mood, and listen to depressing music...maybe get out my guitar...

thanks for reading

xoxo

j

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12/02/2009 05:31 PM
lydian
lydian  
Posts: 538
Member

Smile Glad you are venting. It is so important for you to do that. Yes, I have been told that I am too positive, too. Whistling

But, we all have our moments and we need to get those dark, horrible thoughts out too. It always makes me feel better, like a burden has been lifted.

I hope you feel better tomorrow. All my best.

LydiaWink


12/02/2009 05:43 PM
Julie4848

Jamie: Hang in there kido..I know the stress you are under..

Regarding OT, I know the feeling, Jim works 12 hour shifts and with OT its 16 (like tonight) since he is a 911 supervisor, and during hard times like the world is in, its even worse, I have not seen Jim in over a week..Sad And when on Salary its even worse, they don't have to pay OT, at least not in the state of illinois. My last job I was salary and at times I would work a 50 hour week for the same pay, I said NEVER AGAIN...

Try and be thankful he has a job at the moment, even tho you need him. You have MD as your second family...

Crying is good for the soul, cry all you want, in the end it will make you feel better..Smile

You know me, try and look at the bright side, you will have dinner for tomorrow and won't have to cook...Smile

Put the kids to bed, get a nice tall glass of wine and take a nice long hot bubble bath and put all the worries behind you, even if its only for 1/2 hour.

Many hugs

J


12/02/2009 05:45 PM
debra28
debra28  
Posts: 201
Member

Jaime,

You are always there for everyone -- you are so entitled to vent. I was crying today to -- I feel my lyme has gotten to my heart. This round of abx doesn't seem to be working and I'm lost -- I know how you feel when you keep thinking you are going to feel good today and you JUST FREAKIN' DON'T!

Thank you Jaime -- for all your help on this miserable journey!


12/02/2009 06:08 PM
Kyri
KyriPosts: 121
Member

Hang in there Jaime!! My heart goes out to you.

12/02/2009 06:17 PM
lishjolene
lishjolene  
Posts: 145
Member

hugs! sometimes once you vent you just feel better! hope this is the case! everyone has down days, weeks or even months but we all here for you!

12/02/2009 06:30 PM
waxby
waxbyPosts: 4811
VIP Member

~~~I hear you Jaime,out here in Sugar Plum Grove howlin at the moon.Come~~~Howl~~~AOUUUUUUUUUU~~~AOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~M~~~~~~~~~

12/02/2009 06:31 PM
TaraT
TaraT  
Posts: 4164
VIP Member

We sure do appreciate you girl. *HUGS*

12/02/2009 07:15 PM
happymom3
 
Posts: 428
Member

hang in there sweet girl-things will turn but sometimes have to muddle through. we are here anytime for you. love and hugs to you

12/02/2009 10:17 PM
learning721
learning721  
Posts: 369
Member

oh jaime!! I hope it gets a little brighter for you girl. You are such a strong person and I am praying GOd will finally give you that healing you need. He holds those tears Jaime Smile Tomarrow is a new day. And i bet that spaghetti was wonderful!! You put me in the mood for some! I know i already told you this, but please take some time for you. As soon as the kiddos are in bed take that warm bath. light some candles. and put that music on. BIG HUGS- and thanks for all the help you've given everyone!!
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