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Lupus Community Lupus Support Forums Introductions & Personal Stories Would Like to Spread the Word.
 

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05/06/2008 01:48
tameka1980
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 My name is Tameka and I am a mother of 3 sweet girls. I found this web site while doing research on Lupus. My mom died of this on March 23,2006. She told my that she had this in May of 2000. I did not know what it was, and I wish that I could have found out more about it before she died. I miss her so much and I want to learn more about this to teach people about it. Espically my girls. I have so many questions, I hope that you guys can help. THANKS!!!
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05/06/2008 02:37
TLClose
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 Hi Tameka

I am so very sorry for your loss.

I wish more people would want to learn about this disease.

Every day all of us are fighting this disease. You will find on this support site someone will always be available to help you with questions and be there for you in all aspects. There is alot of emotion that you can feel just from reading the post. I have cried and laughed with other members on this site. Each time I have asked for help someone was there to answer me and give me advice.

My thoughts are with you and welcome to the support site.

Trudy
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05/08/2008 10:59
mumeva
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 Hi Tameka,

My prayers are with you and your family. This disease is a very difficult disease to diagnose-treat and to deal with not just for those of us that have it but for the entire family and friends. I've read alot of books on this illness and I take it one day at a time. This is a great site to learn and to discuss the illness with alot of wonderful people.

Eva
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05/08/2008 21:10
tameka1980
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 Thank You. I feel so bad because my mom use to to say how her feet and ankles were always swolen and how she was always tired. Her skin was dark,she could not go out in the sun. I wish I would have been more sensitive. Now that I think back,the last week that she was alive she had wanted to come and see me. But she could not walk and then she got really sick but would not go to the hospital. The last time I talked to her could not breathe,but she told me that she would be ok. She went to the hospital and my dad called me and said one of her lungs collasped,then he liver shut down and she died. On March 23,2006 my mom died. I miss her so much,I wish I could have done more to make her feel better,but I did not understand how serious it was.Thats why I see that people need to be made aware of Lupus, it is very serious.
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05/08/2008 23:19
Amber102907
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 I feel your pain. I lost my father At age 18 in 1998. I still cry sometimes. 1 year after he told us he was sick he passed away at age 49. I am now 29 and have just been diagnosed with Lupus in april 2008. I have 3 kids and I am a single mom. I am more scared for them then for myself. My lupus is specific to my Kidneys. Reading your story makes me soo sad for you. Please don't ever blame yourself for not going to see her she knows you love her!!! and of coarse you couldn't have known how bad she really was. Just remember all those things you love about her some will make you laugh some will make you cry either way its good. Take care i'll keep you in my prayers.

Amber
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05/09/2008 10:38
tameka1980
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 Thank you.Im sure you will be just fine. I got"tested" for it. But then I found out their is no certain test for it. I was told that I did not have it,but im not really sure. My mom wanted me to get tested before she died,but I waited untill my second child to get tested. My mom told me that my great-grandmother on my grandfathers side could have had it. She died in a mental hospital,she also had the same skin problems that my mom had. She was a very light skin woman,then her skin turned dark and began to scar,but during that time,it was not known about,they thought she was crazy. Thanks a lot.
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05/09/2008 14:19
mumeva
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 Tameka,

I don't always let my daughter know that I'm in a flare because I don't want to worry her and I'm sure thats what your mom was doing. Its very difficult when you lose someone you love very much. I lost my father going on l7 years but you know it seems like yesterday. I think of him every single day and I'm sure glad he didn't know about my lupus it would have broken his heart. Just knowing that your mom loved you so much and you loved her is priceless. I'm still praying for you.

Take Care,

Eva
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05/09/2008 23:38
tameka1980
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 I think you are right,but dog, I just wish I would have been their for her more. I was 25 when she passed. My brother was 20. I think that this whole thing has taught me to pay more attention to my family and to love them even more. Her and my dad were married almost 30 years, and sometimes he tells me that he misses her. My babies are to young to understand. My 7 year old has been with my parents her whole life, and she took it pretty hard and still has her days to. I understand because that was her mom to. She saw it all,she would rub my moms legs and bring her things. But I thank you for the prayers and really just for reading my post.
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05/10/2008 14:04
mumeva
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 You know if you want to learn more about lupus search on the internet sometimes I do that even though I've read quite abit on the subject. For me, because I have this illness I wanted to know as much as possible. Just continue talking about your mom to your kids as much as possible and they will never forget all the wonderful things your mom did. When I lost my father my daughter was so very close to him and she was going on 6 and she still remembers every little detail about him and their time together and thats what love is all about.

Eva
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05/10/2008 20:13
tameka1980
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 My oldest girl still talks alot about my mom. She says that she has a lot of dreams about her and says that she misses her alot. My middle girl was 4 months when my mom died and the last time that we saw her,she sat at the dinning room table and held and rocked my baby why they were listing to the radio. It was like my mom knew that would be the last time that she would hold her grandbaby. I have a lot of stories to tell the kids about my mom. She was in the Army and helped to deliver babies. She was a kind woman who was a neat nick and was always on me about everything. And now I see why.

Tameka
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