Heroin Addiction Support Group

Hello, my heart is pretty much broken like the rest of

you. My son has stolen things,lied,and promised to get better as long as I will help him. I'm DONE. Tina

I'm sorry Tina. It is very hard to believe someone we love so much would do such a thing. Just remember, your son is somewhere in there still. We're here for you!

Thank You Kelly. He called my mom 19 times today. I guess that he forgot that she works every day.My mom is going to accept 1 more collect call from him and she'e going to tell him to stop.He tried to call out to me during court yesterday and the police told him to shut it. But I know what he was yelling at me-PUT MONEY ON MY BOOKS AND GET ME A CALLING CARD. i looked at him and shook my head no.my mom was at work when he made the 19 calls to her home.I truly believe that he has made promises to the other prisoners that his mom (me) will put money on his books and buy him calling cards.I truly believe that he is doing heroin in jail. He's 20 and I cant make him go to a help house. I just don't know if I should pick him up from jail in 30 days or let them drop him off in a bad part of town. I do not want him at my house.I'm sort of stuck between my brain and my heart. Thanks for letting me vent. Tina

Tina, those are tough questions. You are right though, you can't make him go to a help house or even get help. When he wants it, he will seek it out. I would make sure you do not enable him in any way. If he knows you will get him out of a pinch each time it happens, he has no reason to stop and look at his situation.

I moved out of my house after two years of denying my husband was using. He spiraled downward for 6 months when I moved out, but he did realize he wanted a change and he did what was needed. When he first asked me for help, I told him no. He wanted to come to my place and detox on my couch...he said none of his buddies would let them stay on their couch b/c they didn't their kids to see that. I told him I don't blame them and that I didn't want to expose our son to that. Since he knew I wasn't going to take him in, he found somewhere else to go. He moved out of the city, moved in with a great influence, started going to a new clinic, changed his cell phone number and cut all ties with the those that were using. He's been clean for over 1 1/2 years now.

Things can get better....it gets harder before it gets easier. Make sure you take care of yourself. It's very important to deal with the feelings and emotions that go with the addiction. Seek out a group or see a counselor. I finally decided to see a counselor, and I'm so glad I did b/c I'm dealing with everything from that painful past now. We're here for you anytime you need us!

Thank you Kelly, On top of all of this, My father went into a nursing home

on Feb.23rd. I'm now trying to take care of all of his needs, and I've just

HAD IT WITH MY SON!!! He sent me the most beautiful letter that I have ever read!

He's still in jail and all he talked about was how he was beat up, and the letter

was just dripping with all of the positive things in his life.PLEASE!!! I'm not

Stupid,Everything I would Love to hear he said! He want's to come home and I

told him NO! I told him you will continue with treatment and he said Oh yes Mom

I want it. He did get a hold of me through a third party and all he yelled at

me was to buy him commissary.

Post edited by: kitten1506, at: 04/14/2011 05:53 PM

Addicts are extremely selfish people. They can't see passed their own wants and needs, and if you don't get it for them or help them get it....then they unleash their wrath of fury. We are stronger than we give ourselves credit for. Hang in there.

You are doing all the right things Tina. I gave my son a roll of quarters he left detox and used the $$ to get heroin. I gave him the calling card (on my home phone) and I got stuck with the $300. bill which is on auto pay (have to pay). I bought him a Mcdonalds food card but he sold it on Craigs list and got $$ for heroin. And, on and on.

It really doesn't pay to help them, it just makes it worse. Everything I did to "help him" just ENABLED him to use more...... Now I don't give him anything. The last time he stole my debit card and wrote bad checks on my account was IT for me....I kicked him out the door and he is not allowed here anymore.

Have to get firm, because they manipulate, steal, play on our Mommy emotions, try to hold us hostage by our love, all so they can get more DRUGS.

Just say no to Enabling. It just makes them worse. You are doing all the right things, keep it up, and he will hopefully wake up soon, and get serious about recovery!

Hugs, Shari

Tina he can go to a sober house. If he is "in treatment" and they have no where to go, they can go to a sober house.....he has to talk to his counselors though. I would be "cautious" about picking him up. If your son is anything like mine, they are actually quite resourceful when they want to be....