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02/03/2011 05:14 AM

Liver failure and heroin. Symptoms?

Pen125
Pen125Posts: 177
Member

Some input please! My brother told my father that his back is full of dark spots, like stains. Could they be related to hepatitis?

Not being lazy here, I'm looking on the net as well and I'll call the family doctor after work.

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02/03/2011 07:21 AM
themmerle
themmerlePosts: 383
Member

Penn: if it is a yellowish (jaundice) appearance, it could be hepatitis. Whatever it is I'd encourage him to get it checked out. Blood disorders can cause bruising etc. as well. Maybe this will scare him enough to get him infront of an MD. You are in my thoughts. I just hate the "guessing" that you do when you have an addict in the family. Tracy

02/04/2011 01:44 AM
Pen125
Pen125Posts: 177
Member

Thanks for they reply! We don't even get to see him so I don't know the exact colour of the spots. My father told him to go to the doctor and he was all "I'm OK, it happens, I'm fine". He is spaced out.

I read about Jared yesterday and my heart sunk. I am so, so sorry...


02/04/2011 05:24 AM
themmerle
themmerlePosts: 383
Member

The pain of losing "one of our own on here" runs so deep. We can all relate and each of us have that nagging worry in the back of our minds....even when they appear to be doing well. I always tell myself that this is my son's personal journey with addiction and only he gets to determine the outcome. All I can do is hold on, find a way to offer support for clean/sober living, and love him (even inspite of himself at times). If the worst ever were to happen i would know that HE KNEW that he was loved and he knew that I always did everything possible to help him....even when it meant telling him NO...or standing up to his nasty behavior."

Hang in there Penn and keep posting. Tracy


02/04/2011 01:38 PM
Sunsign73
Sunsign73  
Posts: 614
Member
I'm an Advocate

It is really important that he see a doc and get it checked out. One of my husband's cousins has Hep from sharing needles. Even if it isn't Hep, he should still know if it's serious and if something can be done about it.

02/07/2011 05:01 AM
Pen125
Pen125Posts: 177
Member

Nope, he refuses to go to the doctor.

It took almost 8 months for him to meet up with our father. It finally happened a couple of days ago. Same old, same old. "Everything is fine" and "I am thinking of you", "I am dreaming of you", "I miss you", "I want us all to be together" and in the end "can you give me some money".

He asked at one point "don't you love me dad?"

When my father told me I almost broke into tears. God, it hurts. I want to go find him, hold him, make him feel protected and safe, loved and appreciated. I want to go over at that rathole where he's living with that woman and even if I have to drag him out, take him to the doctor.

He said that when the baby gets angry it looks like me. That hit a nerve. It feels as if my arms have a life of their own, wanting, no, craving to hold that baby.

Helpless and confused, that's how I feel right now, but this shall pass too.


02/08/2011 06:43 AM
Sunsign73
Sunsign73  
Posts: 614
Member
I'm an Advocate

I know it's hard. You KNOW what needs to be done, but they won't listen. They can't see clearly. They live in a fog and honestly think nothing is wrong...they don't realize the true gravity of the situation.

The only way to minimize the affect his addiction has on your life is to minimize your contact with him. Don't let his addiction take over your life. You need to live your life. It was hard to get to that point with my husband, but I finally did. When I moved out I had turned a corner I never thought I would. I kept saying "I can't take this anymore", yet I would let another day go by in the same situation. Finally I said "I can't take this anymore" and meant it. I moved out and a HUGE burdon was off my chest. I caved in to the "I'm done" of it all. I was mentally, physically and emotionally exhausted. I wasn't taking care of myself, and my son deserved to have his mother focus on him instead of his addict father all the time.

It's hard, but everyone gets to a turning point somewhere in their life. Hang in there.


02/09/2011 01:15 AM
Pen125
Pen125Posts: 177
Member

Oh dear... I witnessed one of the notorious phone calls. 45 minutes of back and forth, of hanging up and calling back. I had to take the mobile phone away from my father even if it met to grab it out from his hands, which I did.

Unfortunately, my brother is not doing well at all. He sounds so very lost.He keeps talking about "his family" and how he'll go nuts if the Social Services take the baby away. I sympathize with him, but...

Well, the Social Services did show up, unexpectedly thank God, and from what my brother said, they found the house unsuitable for a baby. They also said to the mother that if she doesn't get clean, they'll take the baby away. They'll come back in 3 months. ??!!

In January, my brother spent 3.400 euros. That is a lot of money to spend only on him, right? She must be using..

He is begging my father for money, threatening him, cursing him, what have you… My poor dad, he thinks he is talking to smb who listens. I made my mother promise that she won't let my father pick up the phone next time he calls. If they want to listen to his voice, she could be the one who'll do the listening.

One good thing: we fianlly got the name of the case worker.

One bad thing: they are trying to move from that flat with the help of the church. Maybe that way the Social Services lose track of them.. I don't know.. Just a thought.

My father gets dizzy when talking with him. Literally. He looses his balance and sees colours everywhere..

He's turning 72 and he has already suffered 3 strokes. He's blaming himself big time. I sat next to him and put my arms around him. He was like “not hug me, you make me feel weak”. Tears rolling down… I told him that I don't pity him, I just love him… Strong, proud dad, you need support too…

Thank you all for being here, you're helping so, so much!

Have a blessed day.

Pen


02/09/2011 09:08 AM
islandcat
islandcat  
Posts: 2672
Senior Member

Oh Pen I wish there was a way you could block his number so he cant call your parents anymore. I know they probably want to continue hearing from him but its hurting them health and mind wise. I am sure you could get a new address from the church if and when they move and make sure social services knows where they are. Losing the child might be the light at the end of the tunnel for them. We're staying with you on this.

02/17/2011 10:53 AM
pattB
 
Posts: 6624
VIP Member

This is not the way you dad needs to spend his last days on earth, Can you block his number like Cat said? Are they in need of a holiday? I think a recheck for Dad at the Dr might be in order. Oh so sorry. i have been following your story.
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