Hello everybody.

I have lost everything, family and job included, to this disease. It's not even a disease yet.

There's so much to say, and I am tempted to give you a long version of my life's story and how I got here. But I'm afraid I'll just bore you to death and I just want to get to the issue that interests me the most.

At first, I was open to everybody about my disease. This resulted in: 1. getting fired; and 2. not getting hired ever again by anybody.

So, of course, in order to make a living, I had to start lying about my health condition. From forging medical reports to nonchalantly denying evidence when confronted.

I know I am obliged by law to declare this, and the employers are obliged by law not to refuse employment on HIV grounds. However, they fail to do that.

I am a nursery nurse (yes, I am male). The parents don't know that their children are handled by a human biohazard.

Being a healthcare professional, I know for a fact I am not exposing these babies to any danger. I took extra precaution, I am extra careful, and at all times no bodily fluid of mine comes in contact with any of my babies. But the prejudice and irrational fear would make my employers and the parents fire me on the spot, just for carying this virus. I need to make a living. I am supporting myself alone. I have nobody by my side.

I am an honest person, and this starts to feel too much. It's a burden.

I am very well regarded at my current workplace (a private hospital) and they appreciate me. I would like to come forward. I can't do this anymore. But I'm afraid. I'd like to hear of opinions from you, normal people, how would you react if you found out that the nurse attending your newborn is HIV positive (on cocktail therapy), and in good health otherwise? Would you be terribly shocked? Would you want him fired? Would you want him off your baby for ever? Would you recommend his dismissal?

Was it so terrible of me to lie about this for more than two years?

I feel like a rotten person, when, deep down, I know I'm not.

Hey there Croc;

I empathize with your story and stand in hurrah of your survival skills and the challenges you are facing with other peoples ignorances to H.I.V

There fears, and the plain stupidity of the lack of knowledge is why I bow to your courage and reaching out with your story!

If you were my nurse and I was in need of care your H.I.V statis would not concern me in the slightest. Knowing me I would be asking a lot of questions as to how you are feeling and doing and get more educated on how to be a better human on such subject matter. Maybe, because I have worked on the front lines of many who have H.I.V and have also sadly burried souls that the A.I.D.S finally had taken. But not without a fight mind you!

You deserve, respect, dignity, to be heard, supported and because this is a disease sometimes (ME)days.

I appologize for the ignorances of other beings. Your story will help to educate. The fact that even the infected blood of an H.I.V carrier does not even last a second if air bourne should help some. My goodness you being a trained nurse....I would feel honored haveing you around if I were sick or had a baby that needed caring for. Rather than someone who did not have the care empathy and education.

Namaste my friend!

Chia

Thanks so much for your warm words. I feel understood, and I'm glad I met (even "on paper") somebody bias-free, that has a sound idea about all this, not driven by prejudice and irrational fear. It's been long since I actually felt completely understood.

Again, thank you. This did me good.

People need to wake up and learn about AIDS and stop acting like its not there.You are no danger to anybody if anything we r to you. You can catch things that could harm you frrom us.

I would let you take care of me or my kids in a heart beat.I had a brother that died of AIDS in 1993 and he fought so hard but didnt have the meds like they do today.

I am not a member of this group but I am looking into it.Croc just know there are people that do care and have a heart,dont let these fools drag you down you need possitive things around you and happy thing like funny movies,laughter helps us to live a better life.

Croc you take care,big hugsssss Lisa