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07/19/2010 01:01 PM

Children of gay parents in school

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Okay, so we have the discussion of gay teens in school. Now, how about children with gay parents in school.

My daughter, now 12, was 3 when my first wife left me for another woman. She never looked back. In that respect, my daughter was a bit lucky, because by the time she started school, her mother was in a relationship with another woman.

Through the intervening years, and having been around it so long, she accepts it as normal. However, what about school?

For the most part she was okay until about age 9 or 10, when her mom talked to her about it. I thought this was too long to wait, considering my daughter was getting picked on a bit at school about having a lesbian mother. She didn't understand what was going on.

My and my almost-ex actually told her about what it meant because of the abuse at school. The ex wasn't too happy about it, but I thought it was important to know.

As it turns out, I was right. After the initial shock and subsequent denial and acceptance, she was able to rise above the people at school who were picking on her.

Since then, she has had it a little easier, and has a good core group of friends. Her best friend's mom is straight, but is good friends with the ex, so there's no stigma or trauma there, either.

How about others? What's the best way to approach it and how did you do it/how would you handle it with your own kids (present or future)?


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