Fibromyalgia Support Group

As some of you already know I work for Dept of Corrections. Well I volunteer to participate in events for father's and their children at the prisons. Things such as back to school events where we raise money for school supplies and clothes for children with incarcerated parents and collect/donate books and all sorts of stuff. Well there are obviously more events during the holidays. For example coming up we have a father/child gift exchange and of course I was asked to volunteer. So i will go and help the kids wrap presents for their dads and check the dads presents to the kids. Then I will get everyone christmas caroling and stuffed full of yummy food. I also talk about any and all charity work I do with my kids so that they understand the importance of helping others and understand that their are other children that have things allot worse then they do. Well anything that I can volunteer or help with I do and it is a wonderful feeling and makes me feel so good. But this year being my first holiday season with fibro and this pain and fatigue I don't know how much I can do. So I am trying to figure out exactly how much I can handle. If you say yes to an event you are commited, they are counting on you. So I am scared to say yes to anything for fear that I more then likely will be in pain and not up to it after a work week. I think that giving back to others or to charity is completely worth the time and effort but trying to figure out how much I can give back this year without taking away from my family since I have limited energy to work with. Does that make sense? If I use up all of my energy on these volunteer activities maybe I won't have enough energy or will be to sore to back Xmas cookies with the boys. I don't know what to do. I will feel so guilty if I don't put in as much time as prior years but don't want to take away from my own family because I know already that I won't be able to do everything I have done in years past. I need some advice

Cori, I know how you feel. Those are all such wonderful things you do! Sometimes you do have to say no though. I volunteer at the SPCA. I help run the mobile adoption unit, however the past 2 years since I have gotten worse with my Fibro, I have had to cut back. I don't want to take away from my boys either. I do take them with me to volunteer most times, but I still can't do it like I used to. Don't feel guilty for not being able to help as much. At least you are trying to do it at all, and you are making such a difference in their lives! Keep it up girlie!

Okay, I want you to learn two new things tonight. The first one, Tabby already mentioned. I want you to lear how to say the word "NO". Go ahead, try it. See how it sounds. Feel the word softly rool off your tongue and through your lips. Go on, try it. Okay?

Now, the next thing I want you to learn is a phrase. Take it slowly and absorb the true meaning of the words. Are you ready? Here it is:

If I can make it, I will.

Now it's your turn. Try saying it. Then repeat it until it feels natural to you.

Hi Starr I didn't see you there You know what's so funny about you saying that is when I promoted into the position before this one it was my first position with any authority and the Lt made me sit down and repeat the words No No over and over again. You sound just like him! Well I will admit I learned then and I will learn now. Actually i think I have made progress because I have not commited to anything at this point and am thinking about things and gathering some helpful advice. See getting better already. I think that I will try to find some things to do for charity during the holiday season that require less travel and energy. I can still be helpful, just in different ways. I don't have to organize the entire event, maybe I can sit and check people in instead! Wow I had my own idea holy cow! I must be getting deleriously tired or something. Hmmm hope I can remember it until tomorrow to write it down!

You are to be admired for all of the wonderful things you do...at work, at home, for your kids, your bf, your boss....and that's year round. That doesn't even touch on how much you give of yourself during the holidays. You are a saint. But I want you to think about something.

Nearly every day, you make a post about how you have over-done it. And boy,, do you over-do it! But please remember to take care of you. You have to work time for yourself into the equation. Imagine (God forbid) how your boys would feel if you were not there for them because you had exhausted yourself to the point of requiring hospitalization. Imagine what it would do to your family and your household if you lost the income you would have earned during that hospital stay.

Now I am not trying to be the Grinch here. I'm just trying to point out why, and how important it is, that you take care of yourself. You have to take care of you before you can be there for anyone else. So, please, as my friend, try to remeber that during your busy holiday season. And remember to take time to enjoy those you love. {{{hugs}}}

LOL....while I was typing, you came up with your own brilliant ideas!

I have never heard of someone exhausting themselves to the point that they would go into the hospital. i don't think i could do that because I sleep every night and I don't do any strenous activity, just runnin around allot. I do post about overdoing it allot. Maybe it is just the stress or the fact that I don't get acknowledgement for the things I do. now that I think about it I really don't do that much... I wonder why I feel the need to complain about it all of the time. I will think about this tonight and try to figure it out. Thanks for your replies, it's very much appreciated. Sleep tight

You are doing alot Cori, and total exhaustion can lead someone to the hospital, so don't let that happen to you! We all care about ya to much for that to happen. Just because you take time to sleep doesn't keep you from getting exhausted. Try to get some rest and sleep tonight, and try to have an easier day tomorrow!

Bless your heart Cori! You have such a big heart!!

giving back can make you feel good, but it can also wear you out.

choose your priorities, and stick with those.

one of the best feelings ever was when i raised over 2,500 dollars for the arthritis foundation (they do research on fybro too). it know how you feel!