newbie who is happy to find this group

I can't tell you how pleased I am to have found your community - I have been reading through some of your posts and articles, and I am really impressed with how much you care about one another and how frank and open the discussions are.

A little bit about me: I am 31 years old, single, and I teach middle school. I have both chronic migraines (past 13 years) and fibromyalgia (past 2-3 years). Because of my extreme sensitivity to medication, I have had a great deal of difficulty finding a long-term treatment plan that will work for me (and I know I may be searching for many years yet to come).

As a result of my long-standing relationship with pain, I often struggle with depression, lonliness, and suicidal thoughts (yes, I see a therapist). Right now, I am confused as to how to deal with my family (parents and siblings). If I tell them how truly awful my world is, it's too much for them; but if I put up a good front (which is usually what happens) they get offended by my inability to join in their activities (shopping, vacation, etc). I'm tired, I hurt, and I'm frustrated. Any thoughts or suggestions are welcome.

Thank you again for providing this place of support -- just reading about those with similar struggles has already given me a measure of comfort.

I know how it is to try to put up a front so that your family do not know how you feel. But believe me it is worse on your fibro then telling them how you feel. Maybe you can get members of your family to come here and even just read what you and all of us go through maybe they will understand. But please do not try to hide it stress is a big sparkplug to fibro. I have had fibro for 17 yrs. and I have tried to keep it from my family because alot of them did not believe me, along with some friends. But I got to the point that I did not care anymore what others think. My health & body is what matters. Once they know what is going on then maybe you can get them to do a smaller shopping trip or where you can sit down and rest along the way. See there are ways that you can still go with them or not go and they will not feel offended if they know how you are feeling.

I* hope at least some of this is helpful to you. Again, I want to welcome you to our family.

{{Soft & Gentle Hugs}} my dear new friend.

Rita

AngelBooze

I also have so many sensitivities that I do not now take any medications for my FM and other problems. I am now seeing a chiropractor/naturopath/therapist, etc. I am taking natural supplements along with some other things that have helped me. I have tried so many things and this seems to be working for now. We are always re evaluating my progress and trying new things. Glad you are seeing a therapist for the depression. I am too. It really does help a lot. If I'm having a really bad day....I try to come on here and even if I don't feel like posting, just reading others comments seems to make me feel better.

I agree that sharing how you feel with your family is probably best. It has been hard for me with family too. I am married and have two children. They have been sooo understanding. It's other family memebers that seem to have a harder time understanding this. I have printed off a list of symptoms for them to read that helped them see some of the things I struggle with. It hasn't been too much for them. It just takes some time to get used to the idea that I'm not able to do what I used to. I think they get frustrated with the fact that I can't go with them much because they just really wish I could be better....I don't think they are upset with me, it's just hard for them to see me so affected by this crazy FM. However, it would be too stressful for me to act like nothing is wrong....and stress definitely doesn't like me. I have also had those that just don't seem to believe that there could be anything wrong because I look so normal. I just don't worry about those people. I have told them about FM and then I just let it go. I guess it will just take more public knowledge of this condition before all people will believe it.

I hope you are having a good day today!!

Again, welcome to the group!

Red

Let me just start by saying,that no matter what, your medical condition is gonna be an adjustment to everyone you tell.I had a hard time telling my family too,but now my 2 sisters know,and don't believe in Fibro...my mom is the only one I get support from as far as "my" family goes.However,my husband has a hard time understanding Fibro even with all the info I've given him...but he's supportive.I think by holding back the truth,it's not giving your family the opportunity to understand truely of what your going thru.Put yourself in their shoes...wouldn't you want to know if your mom or sibling had something dibilitating as Fibro?

This is however,your choice on what to do.But alot of us have already been thru this stage and its much healthier for you, to just educate people on your condition.

Good luck to you my dear,and again welcome to the family.Feel free to pm me anytime.

~~warm gentle huggs~~JL

Post edited by: JLCarter, at: 04/27/2008 15:04

I can't say how important it is that people around you know that you are not just being difficult that it is an illness that does not make you look sick. Tell them about it and show them some information. Hopefully, they will understand and be there to help you but I also prepared myself for friends and some family not understanding, I guess you could call it weeding out the users. If you don't tell them I can understand that part also, but this is really not something you want to go through by yourself. You have us to vent and help anyway we can but you still need people that are there in person. Just a few thoughts, Welcome Jean

Thank you again -- it helps to have an additional sounding board

Ohhh, invite him to join us here.....if you'd be okay with that. There are several others who are here in a supportive capacity, an attempt to learn more and be more effective at supporting their family member who has fibro.

I agree with others who have posted, you will love it here Please just jump right in and make yourself at home!!