What do you do to make your relationships work? And do you know of any creative and fun dates that are cheap and fibro firendly? I plan to write more and explain my situation tomorrow but I thought I would get this started tonight because the sooner I get some advice the better!

Thank you all for your love and support and input. I really appreciate it and need it!

Much love, soopergirl

First, please do write more so we can get a little better understanding of what's going on so maybe we could come up with more or better suggestions!

But for now, well...it's hard to have a relationship with this icky stuff! But it can be done and it can be fun! For me...it's all about being sure that he understands just how I might be feeling. If my pain is bad...he needs to know that THAT is what the matter is! If I'm fatigued, he needs to know that...so he can learn to 'adjust' his day around what I may not be able to do with him. Or, better...what I CAN do! So, say my pain is bad, but I'm not so tired, I'll be laying down (usually in bed) and we'll watch a movie together or even get out the old fashioned pad and paper and play hang-man or something. I know...joy, joy...but it's time spent together...even if it's just doing that! And, unless I'm in a BAD flare, I try to stay pretty positive and 'cheery'...even if I don't particularly feel like it. So, spending an afternoon laying on the bed, playing hang-man and laughing together, with each other is just fine for the both of us.

You may or may not know that my hubby and I have only been married going on 6 months and have only known each other for going on ONE year. So, we're still new at this and newlyweds! Sometimes...no...A LOT of times, it's hard to keep that fire burnin or at least see the spark...but if your bf at all understands Fibro and still wants to be with you...you two can make it work...and like I said, make it fun. I've said this before, but in case you didn't get to read it, I'll say it again. I ALWAYS make sure that when I'm complaining (in my head)...I DON'T COMPLAIN! I SHARE! And, I tell him, "I'm sharing." I know that many bf's, spouses, S/O's, other halfs, etc., get tired of hearing us complain. So, instead of every day, over and over saying I'm tired or I HURT...I'll put it a different way. Something like, "Ohhhhhhhhh hunee, I think I feel a 'Fibro' day comin on...maybe we should stick close to home today...ya know, watch a movie or I know...you can rub me from head to toe!" Share with him how you're feeling, yet try not to 'nag' about it. Shoot, as you just read...I even try to make a joke out of it sometimes and...in return, he has started to himself! If I'm having a bad day, I might also let him know and then tell him that if there is something that he wants to do...to go ahead. That I'm a big girl and I can stay home alone for a day. He won't...but at least I've offered that he can go without me and that it's okay! I do that because not only do they struggle with the fact that we're 'sick'...but they also might feel guilty for feeling good. Which I know sounds totally not even right...but my husband has mentioned that to me...so I make sure he knows not to feel that way!

As far as cheap...shoot...it's hard. We go cheap too! We just have to these days and we're not quite used to it either, so that makes it double hard. And, there aren't many things cheap anymore, not to mention GAS to get there! I guess I'm lucky that I've been having several 'better' days. We enjoy each other...neither one of us are 'material' people, so just being together and happy is what's important to us. So, we go for a lot of walks. One day by the water and the next time in the woods. We like to watch birds fly and bugs crawl. Not that we sit in the woods and watch for birds. BORING!!!! I mean, just nature I guess. It's beautiful out there and if we can't feel good inside of our bodies...then I try to see some good 'out there'! So, nature, puffy clouds, even big LEAVES are pretty if you try to see life that way. I mean, after all...WE don't have much to look forward to sometimes, so I try to find 'fun and beauty' in even the smallest things. Obviously, I mean shoot...when you have to find fun in a leaf...you gotta get a life, right? But, yes...that's just it...I don't have much of a life, so the smallest things CAN put a smile on my face! I've just had to change the way I look at things and listen to the hubby when he makes suggestions as well. He comes up with some pretty good stuff and is always thinking about my Fibro. Like for instance...if we go for a walk...he ALWAYS reminds me..."Remember, we have to go back too, so have we gone far enough yet?" Bless his heart!! He's in awesome shape, so what seems like a "HIKE" to me is like walking to the kitchen for him! But, we make it work and so can you! Be creative, shoot...google "fun stuff to do" and see what you get! You never know!

I always remind myself that when I DO have a good day...I give him MY ALL...because he deserves it!! He keeps himself busy day after day with his computer, guitar, housework and then there's the computer and guitar! LOL...so when I'm feeling good...I need to be sure that he knows it and that he knows that he has my full attention.

So now that I babbled and wrote a stupid little book about myself...let us know more about yourself, maybe what the two of you WANT to do and things you like...maybe others will have a some better suggestions for ya~

I guess I'll sum this all up by saying this...

When you DO get to see each other, try to make it the BEST that you can...no matter what you find to do!!!

As long as you and your beau have love that's all you need. It's like

sweetheartsuzee said. Me and my husband will lay in bed together and watch a movie. He says as long as we are together that's all tht matters. We have been together it will be 8 years in August and there's been at least one surgery a year for one of us since 2003. Our love could be no stonger we have helped each other. But I also realize it helped him more to read the 50 symptoms that was posted on the sight. It has helped him understand more. Try and be patient with him, men have trouble dealing with health issues more than women. Keep your love for each other strong.

God will take care of you both. With love and understanding. smile.