Why wear a ribbon?

"Because I wish to make others aware that although I look ok on the outside, insi..." (oroman)

MDJunction to me

"MDJ has changed my life in soo many ways. I don't know where I'd be today without it! :)" (sweetheartsuzee)
We comply with the HONcode standard for trustworthy health information:
verify here.
Fibromyalgia Online Support Group
Fibromyalgia Support Group
A community of patients, family members and friends dedicated to dealing with Fibromyalgia, together.
Join This Group
Group Home   Forums   Articles   Members (1756)   Diaries   Leaders   Guidelines
FMS Community FMS Support Forums General & Support Sex Life With Fibromyalgia II
Sex Life With Fibromyalgia II
Related discussions:
<< Start < Prev 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Next > End >>
03/05/2008 22:18
cappymuir
Green Ribbon
Posts: 88
Member

Send a PM
Give a Hug
 yes- Ihave problems with theoral issue and my husband seems to want that the most too. I startede this experience when we first started dating, due his lack of sexual experience. I told him that I did not enjoy it then because of being abused. I should have never done it in the first place and then he would not ask me for it all the time. I tell you it makes me feel less of a female and not sexually appealing to have my other half always wanting that. On the other hand , my jaw tightens up- throat and into my shoulders. I not only end up with severe jaw pain but a major ear ache too with spasms down into my shoulders. Not very fun. I do try to figure out a way to compromise and still make him happy. It is not full blown oral but it makes him happy. I know that I feel like the most not sexual person here, when i look at all my personal issues that affect my sex life. So you are not alone.
--- The discussion has been locked ---



03/06/2008 06:22
Sandradee
Lavender Ribbon
Posts: 24
New Member

Send a PM
Give a Hug
 I sympathize with your abuse. I was also abused from 3-10 by my father and sometimes have a problem with disassociation during intimacies.

As far as the jaw problem. Yep, it is a problem for me also. I only do that when it has been a few days but I am in too much pain to have sex. When I do it I do the "combo". Sorry if TMI but....it is a combination of hand/mouth. He's happy and I am not overly exerting my jaw.

--- The discussion has been locked ---



03/06/2008 07:22
ALCSS2008
Purple Ribbon
Posts: 820
Member

Send a PM
Give a Hug
 Since I've been sick my husband seems to have lost interest in sex. I thought it was because of my weight gain, but he denies this. I asked him what the problem is and he said he is just not interested in sex at all. He is 46 years old. We have only been married for seven years and had a very active sex life prior to the car accident. We have not had sex for over 3 weeks. At first he blamed me saying he didn't want to hurt me and that I said I didn't feel good and then I told him that I was not going to take that blame for our sex life. I told him I was ready anytime and that if we didn't have sex it was because he didn't make the attempt. HE gets really defensive when I bring the subject up. I asked him if he was having an affair and he acted offended and said no. What do you think? Midlife crisis?----girlfriend?------not attracted to me???

I can take the truth

Sandi

ccc

Popular posts by Sandi
    Muscle spasms
    pain meds
--- The discussion has been locked ---



03/06/2008 07:26
Sandradee
Lavender Ribbon
Posts: 24
New Member

Send a PM
Give a Hug
 I think get counseling. Don't stress yourself thinking affair or something like that without completely researching the situation. You will just make yourself feel crappier and he will feel your negative feelings toward him. Is he depressed??? could be.
--- The discussion has been locked ---



03/06/2008 07:32
coolmamma
Pink Ribbon
Posts: 559
Member

Send a PM
Give a Hug
 I think he's denying how he really feels about your pain. It sounds like maybe he's afraid of hurting you more. I think it's hard for our spouses...they see that we are in pain & that we take meds...they don't want to treat us differently because of the pain, but the reality is that they need to. This means that they aren't sure what they can/can't do during intimacy that won't cause more pain. It's a hard topic to discuss...my hubby and I went thru a time when he didn't know how to touch me anymore cuz I was always saying how much I hurt. We went to counseling, which opened the doors of communication. Now I am able to guide his hands where I need them to be and it's more pleasurable for both of us.

Question for you: Have you tried initiating with him? Maybe he's waiting for you to make the first move?
--- The discussion has been locked ---



03/06/2008 07:43
Windy
Pearl Ribbon
Posts: 11
New Member

Send a PM
Give a Hug
 What's "sex"? I seem to have a vague recollection of this word...perhaps back in my 40's and 50's.
“I guess you live in your head more than anyplace else. If your head is in a good place, it doesn’t matter quite as much if the rest of you isn’t.” Patterson/DeJonge; “Beach Road”
--- The discussion has been locked ---



03/09/2008 21:40
Willy
Purple Ribbon
Posts: 49
Member

Send a PM
Give a Hug
 Thank you for this discussion. I really appreciated reading everyone's posts on this and I really appreciated the candidness and the humor. Not quite ready to participate in this, but I can't thank you all enough,

Sincerely,

Willy
--- The discussion has been locked ---



03/21/2008 09:25
thomasann
Purple Ribbon
Posts: 661
Member

Send a PM
Give a Hug
 I too have the cramping after sex. That's when I even have it. I have lost the desire for it.
--- The discussion has been locked ---



03/21/2008 09:46
PDW
Purple Ribbon
Posts: 223
Member

Send a PM
Give a Hug
 Sandi,

Have you stopped to think, maybe he is affraid to make you hurt. Honey he realizes that you hurt and don't want you to feel any worse. This disease makes you feel bad enough don't think negative thoughts. He don't know how to deal with this disease any more than you do. Have him read this sight some, to realize everyone involved with this disease has the same problems. My Husband and I have been married about the same amount of time. But after 2 hystorectomies, I have lost the urge and he had to read some to realize I'ts not him it's my mind.

I was rasied Cathlic I was taught sexual intercourse was just for making children. After my first hystorectomy I lost all urges for sex. I felt broken, because I couldn't have children, I couldn't before the surgery I lost 3 babies. Miscarriges?

I had Fibrods. But we have found that sex is not that important just beng together is. tAKING BATHES TOGETHER AND CUDDLING TO WATCH MOVIES TOGETHER has really kept our love strong. Stay possitve. Stay strong. Pray God to help you deal with this situation.

Laughter is the best medicine.


Popular posts by PDW
    New here
    Soooo Angry
    SSD
--- The discussion has been locked ---



03/21/2008 09:48
PDW
Purple Ribbon
Posts: 223
Member

Send a PM
Give a Hug
 Willy,

Jump on in nothing makes you feel better than expressing you thoughts as well. We are all friends here don't be shy.


Popular posts by PDW
    New here
    Soooo Angry
    SSD
--- The discussion has been locked ---



<< Start < Prev 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Next > End >>


Disclaimer: The information provided in MDJunction is not a replacement for medical diagnosis, treatment, or professional medical advice. Read more.
Contact Us | Bookmark Us | Add a Doctor | For Doctors | FAQ | Awareness Ribbons
About Us | Terms & Conditions | Privacy | Spread the Word | Advertise
Copyright (c) 2008 MDJunction.com All Rights Reserved