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05/10/2012 08:40 PM

***Warning! VENT!***

jeanetter44
jeanetter44  
Posts: 150
Member

Hey everyone!

I usually try to keep out some people's ignorant responses to my condition. Like many here I have horrible chronic pain that takes the form of many different types of pain, constant and traveling.

Today my neighbor who is the same age as me, (43) told me that I'm just hurting because of "old age". I've been sick for three years and she JUST moved in last year. She says she has pain everyday too. I try to tell her it's different and go into the ways it differs.

She caught me totally off guard and I'm sick of her innuendos, that I am not sick! I don't know how to shut her up without being vindictive! I really don't want to be, however if she keeps it up, something is eventually going to come out of my mouth.

She has NO CLUE on HOW MUCH I've Struggled over the passed three years! I've tried to educate her. She is just so contemptuous!

Anyone have any advice? She's the type of person who is a know-it-all, yet knows nothing at all.

Arrrgghh!! I just know it building up. She's going to get it! (lol) I have to laugh at myself after saying that! But it's serious.

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05/10/2012 08:59 PM
mabri
mabri  
Posts: 4769
VIP Member

Jeanetter,

I'm sorry that you were treated that way. I hate it when someone who knows nothing runs their mouth like they know it all. I guess you could handle this one of 2 ways...Either just completely avoid her and don't give her the opportunity to talk to you anymore about this...OR you could just tell her off. Either way, I guess your friendship (if there is one) will basically be over. I don't know..that is just what I would do, doesn't mean that is what you want to do. I just couldn't hold my tongue, and would tell her that if she can't support me and treat me with respect that I didn't need her. Let me know what happens if anything does. HUGS


05/10/2012 09:16 PM
VH72
VH72  
Posts: 235
Member

I heare you I had dr.say that too but you can see they will be the first to come running when something happing how do you deal with it. hang in there HUGS comming your way

05/10/2012 10:33 PM
bfly
bfly  
Posts: 4078
VIP Member

My new favorite quote I heard recently... "What you think of me is none of my business"... Not everyone is going to understand- and she probably is one of those humans that has to be the focus... sometimes can't even fool with it. I'm doing the AA gig of late... and they suggest to pray for that person... not sure what you believe- so by all means ignore me if you so choose!! I'm sorry you have to experience the frustration- just remember you can't control others. I had trouble verbalizing what it was until I started educating myself (still learning!)- gave me more of a dialogue to express the difference between fibro and "everyday pain" BS. We are here to support you - vent the hell away! Lord knows I do my share!

05/11/2012 01:44 AM
Bananers
 
Posts: 302
Member

I would just remind myself how stupid she is every time she says dumb things.

I had a co-worker say to me once..."I should ask you to help more...that is if you are physically capable"...keeping in mind that this was in a nasty condescending voice. I should have told him what was really on my mind, but opted not to.


05/11/2012 05:17 AM
hatbox121
hatbox121  
Posts: 11022
Group Leader

Yep, I've got some advice. Ignore her. Don't talk to her, don't meet her, etc. If you see her in the hall, be polite and say "hello." but stop there. Ever heard that old saying about casting pearls before the swine? It applies here. If you've tried to explain it to her and she refuses to listen or learn then why are you wasting your time and energy on repeating the same things? Another old quote... "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again but expecting different results."

05/11/2012 05:27 AM
Adewyn
Adewyn  
Posts: 5733
Group Leader

lol.. and these are the people that are no longer in my life.... and will ever be accepted into my life... just walk away and avoid she is not worth the anger or the stress... hugs and love

05/11/2012 05:39 AM
jeanetter44
jeanetter44  
Posts: 150
Member

Well since I can't avoid her, she's just going to GET IT! Then I'll pray for her. My driveway faces hers so she's always calling my name to talk to me. I'm just going to be very assertive and tell her if she can't support me, I really don't need to hear her opinion on what she thinks is wrong with me.

THANK YOU everyone for your responses!

She is ignorant and once I pull rank on her I really believe she'll shut up about it. It's so nice to sleep on things. You can awake with a much clearer mind.


05/11/2012 06:35 AM
Raoul
RaoulPosts: 4014
VIP Member

deleted

Post edited by: Raoul, at: 05/11/2012 07:13 AM


05/11/2012 09:19 AM
mem1318

Sometimes you have to walk away from self center, dis-respectful, ignorance, people. I could have a few other choice words. My grandma always said feed them out of a long handle spoon. That mean in my book to stay the hell away from me. You don't have to say anything but hello and goodbye if that's what you want. By the time that person see the expression on your face he/she should NO. Go on about your business he/she is not worth you wasting your time with. People will take your kindness for you weakness.

Why did you delete Raoul? Was it that bad? Whatever reason it was, I would think that is how you felt. Hope you are feeling better.

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