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05/10/2012 12:00 PM

does anyone get envious of healthy people?

christa33
 
Posts: 148
Member

does that make me bad for being jealous of healthy people? i try not to be but it is hard. do u think this is a normal thing people with illnesses go through? or does it make me bad or something? like i often wonder why these things happen to good people who deserve good things, others get that all the time, and others end up with lupus or cancer or MS, etc....

do you know what i mean? i think a lot of times also i feel ALONE in my illness , even when i feel better, like no one gets it . i find it sooo hard to talk to healthy people cuz they could never imagine what it is like. so i feel like an alien half the time in this other world. alone and isolated. like no one can relate.

i wish i didnt feel like that but it is so hard when everyone around me is soooooooooo healthy, glowing, energetic, vibrant, can run and walk and such, and i just wonder why others, not just me, get the short end of the stick. ive been thinking on this quesiton for a year now, and i have thought of some things but wondering if others had any insights. since ive always been into phlisophy, lol i was just curious into the WHYS of ilness and WHY some get it and some dont, etc...i know this might sound dumb, lol but

it has been on my mind for so long.

thanks!

Love

Maureen

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05/10/2012 02:12 PM
Adewyn
Adewyn  
Posts: 5730
Group Leader

on occassion....when i was at my worst i would wonder things like that.... now that i have fought my way back.. there are still things i cant do just yet... but i am not giving up hope...i put the energy into what can i do today... and if i do look at person and think they are lucky they can do that.. i find out how i can make myself stronger to do that.... I Will Not ever let me self EVER get back to where i can barely move. NEVER... i will sit in the ER till they do something for me but i will never ever ever go back to where I was 4 years ago . I woud have be in a coma or shoot down before i end up barely walking.. i thank the gods and the goddess for helping me fight my way back and i am here to stay.... So.. yeah i did once... i wont again.. i will only strive for better Smile hugs and love. let me know if there is anything i can do for you ...

05/10/2012 02:12 PM
LilyRose4
LilyRose4  
Posts: 261
Member

You are not alone in feeling this way. I have a hard time being around "normal" healthy people as well, especially listing to them complain about "regular" problems. I think, what I wouldn't give just to go back to dealing with regular life issues without having to do it in constant physical pain all the time and with the emotional aspects as well. It has made me a lot more aware of how insensitive I was in the past. I am working through this with too and trying to have more patience with people and be grateful/adjust...it's not easy.Wink

05/10/2012 02:16 PM
livewithhope
livewithhope  
Posts: 739
Member

Wow! Have you been peeking inside my brain? That's spooky, b/c I feel that way so much of the time. I don't know what the answer is, though, but you're not alone.

05/10/2012 02:25 PM
christa33
 
Posts: 148
Member

thanks guys, lol ahhahahahahaha

adewyn, yeah, i know how u feel, i couldnt walk just a couple months ago, now i can, i feel the same way , im going to fight n not lost hope, i know,i know i can, i have before!!! ok my walking is weak but i need help with it. and with cfs it is awful. we have to be our own docs, docs dont knwo crap!!!!! that is what i beleive. so be ur won doc and trial and error see what works!!!!! i mean , it takes time to get better but i , i have hope now. im so much better then before, like u , i couldnt move n i did it myself! still have the bad days but hey.

thanks lily rose, u r so pretty,

yes i agree, i totally agree. it is so hard i know! i do try though. to be grateful for what i do have. but hard to relate though.

live with hope, apparently , i HAVE been peeking into ur brain!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ahahahahahhaa see? i guess im not alone i felt so bad fror this.


05/10/2012 05:54 PM
Raoul
RaoulPosts: 4012
VIP Member

deleted

Post edited by: Raoul, at: 05/11/2012 07:15 AM


05/10/2012 06:03 PM
MoiraWolf
MoiraWolf  
Posts: 3416
Senior Member

I think having fibro is, for me anyway, sort of a "course correction." I wasn't doing with my life what I was supposed to, or the Universe had another plan for me. I've been fighting Fibro my whole adult life. I barely remember what it was to be "normal." I was only diagnosed this year, but I believe I've had it a lot longer. It's the fatigue that gets me the most. My pain isn't as bad as some of you (well, doesn't seem like it unless I forget my meds, THEN I notice it!) but like today. I slept for the sleep study last night. I got about 6 hours of sleep. I came home, went to bed, and slept another 2 or 3 hours. I got up, fiddled around on the computer for a bit, but was still sleepy, so went back to bed and slept another 2 hours. Here I am now, it's just 7pm and I'm STILL sleepy!

I haven't done anything all day except drive home, fiddle on the forums and Facebook, and sleep. But I'm as tired as if I've run a race. And yes, sometimes, I look at others and think "it's not fair, I'm sick and they aren't."

Everything happens for a reason.


05/10/2012 06:08 PM
hatbox121
hatbox121  
Posts: 11022
Group Leader

Nope, I'm not. First it does me no good. It takes more energy that is already in short supply. Second I've never felt good so I wouldn't know what to do with it if I did. And third, for whatever reason, I'm meant to be this way. Perhaps I'm strong enough to handle it when others aren't or whatever but there's some reason and I'm ok with it.

05/10/2012 10:18 PM
bfly
bfly  
Posts: 4078
VIP Member

@Raoul- guess your feelings on the matter are why you are a senior member! Impressive.

I don't think you should be so hard on yourself... don't judge your feelings as bad... they just are. It's frustrating- and I'm still working on the acceptance aspect (diagnosed 11/11)... An interesting definition to Envy - just for fun- I know you don't mean it this way at all... "I like what you have, I want what you have (i.e. health), I don't want you to have what you have"... potent definition in my opinion!

Your feeling are normal and your perspective will change and grow and then regress, and grow again... this is very hard to deal with- everyday it seems- some better than others but never quite groovy! I agree with hatbox about it taking up a lot of energy- so I really try not to play the comparison game... I wish you success in dealing with your feelings and the pain. Blessings!


05/11/2012 02:30 AM
Montag
Montag  
Posts: 252
Member

I don`t get jealous.

I`ve had many awakenings over the last 22 yrs with fibro. Seems like it was a necessary evil into the world I know & love now.

I`m happy to see kids jumping, skipping, hopping.....ppl dancing, having fun.

I, too have lots of fun ~ life has much more meaning - its deeper & richer b/c of the senses I`ve had to learn how to use.

As long as the ppl who aren`t like me leave me alone, or try to understand then the let the world spin!!!!!!

Post edited by: Montag, at: 05/11/2012 02:33 AM

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