Fibromyalgia Support Group

I am here because of 3 friends. I do not have Fibromialgia.....they do. I am confused. None of them had any symptoms until one of them had an emotional trauma which was quite debilitating. She delt with depression for several months (which included fatigue and aches.) She was finally doing well until someone told her they thought she had Fibromialgia...she immediately became sicker...now she says she can't leave the house or go to work. Two other friends...who,respectively, were getting a divorce and had a miscarriage....listened to the first friend describe her symptoms...and...over the following 6 months...both of them came down with Fibromialgia. Now none of them work, and can talk of nothing but this disease. I truely do not believe that within a years time all three of my (previously healthy) friends have contracted the same neurological disease...Help me understand this.

Do any of your friends have a diagnosis from their doctors. There is a lot to fibro. I cantell you from my experience that it can hit you quickly. If you are concerned about them, and you know that they do not have a diagnosis, then you should encourage them to get it checked out. The diagnosis takes time because their doctors will have to do a lot of tests to rule out other conditions that are similar to fibro, such as MS, Lupus and Lyme disease. If they think they have fibro, a doctor will have to get them on a regimen of medicines, exercise and possibly therapy. It they do have a diagnosis, it is hard on friendships because the one with fibro may not be able to do all that they did do. But, most are not totally incapacitated. I still work full time, and have one daughter still at home. We still travel, but I do push myself to do as much as I can do. And, yes, my friendships have suffered because I just don't have the energy and time to do things outside of the things I have to do. It sounds from your post that you are doubting them, and it is weird that all three would be diagnosed at the same time. Before saying something hurtful, check out what doctors they are seeing first, and if they self-diagnosed based on something someone said or something they read, then as a friend, you should encourage them to undergo testing. I wouldn't wish this on my worst nemisis, but you are within your rights as a friend to encourage them to seek medical attention. Trust me, if they aren't seeing a doctor or doctors, it probably isn't fibro. There is so much pain involved, as you can see from many of these posts, that you practically live in one or more doctor's offices. Good luck!

To be honest...I don't think any of them have it....I have an acquaintance at work who does...she has her problems, but is very proactive...she gets massages, spinal adjustments...she exercises, and does pretty well.

The other three just whine a lot....and it seems that it is a competition to see whose symptoms are the worst. Sometimes, one of them has no syptoms at all if she chooses... and with all three, the symptoms seem to get worse if they are trying to avoid something unpleasant. Actually, I think what I have is three neurotic friends.....not long my friends if they keep it up. I just don't understand why anyone would do this to themselves...???

Hello, welcome aboard. I am trying to find a way to explain this in a few words, since I can't sit and type for long period of time due to pain in my hands. Grieving has various stages to work thru. One of the stages is shock, then anger, then grieving, etc... I believe that right now, your friends are trying to get as much information as possible from each other. The very best way to get information is to read the various sites that write about Fibro, Chronic Fatigues, etc.. And then join a site like this, and read some more. And the most important thing to do is to see a Rheumotologist for a diagnosis.

Please do not close your self off to the very important part of learning that comes with "experience" in life. Read, read, and read some more.

Just because our many symptoms and similar aches and pains seem like its all its in OUR heads, it really is not so. My biggest health challenge is with is Fibro, Chronic Fatigue, etc.. But alot of times its with others who do not even try to understand what we live with.

Please do not turn away from your friends. Nice to have met you and take care.

I've read a lot and I have experienced a lot in 65 years....I also have a great deaL of pain...but it is only pain....

You obviously care about them, or you wouldn't be here. The easiest way to describe fibro is imagine you have the worst flu of your life and imagine all of the aches, pains and fatigue that goes with it. Then imagine the brain fuzziness that many women get during menopaus only 10 times worse to the point you cannot remember what you were doing or going or where you are..,and fearing that you are beginning with Alzheimer's. That is what it is like for us, so it is truly not like the aches and pains we get with age...it doesn't go away. I take 4 Percocet 10/350 and 40 mg of Opana, or oxomorphone, and my pain still interfers with my day. That is why I believe that if your friends do not have a diagnosis and are not going out of their minds with the pain, fatigue and mental issues, then they probably do not have it. For their sakes, they really should see a doctor to get a diagnosis because it could be fibro or it could be something else. They need to find out to take proper steps to deal with it. If they will not take steps to help themselves, then you have done all you can do as a friend. You can take a horse to water, but you cannot make him drink. Frankly, I have found myself pulling more and more into myself. I don't want to talk with others and sound like I am whining all the time. Even my family gets tired of it, I am sure. As Oroman says, try to stick in there with them. If they do have it, and they are fortunate enough to have each other to lean on, that's great, but they will need to look outside of themselves at some point and will need you more than ever.

Post edited by: Kvasconez, at: 07/28/2011 04:17 PM

Post edited by: Kvasconez, at: 07/28/2011 04:17 PM

OROMAN...

shock and anger and GRIEVING FOR WHAT???? What would you grieve for? It isn't terminal!

Oh dear! Does someone who has been here longer than me want to get this?

The shock and anger would be because your life changes so much. No, it's not terminal and we are all very grateful for that. This illness robs some of their life and laying in bed or on the couch all day is THEIR NEW LIFE. Plenty of reasons to be in shock or anger or whatever.

If you want to stay in the group, I'm going to request that you have respect for everyone. We are all entitled to our own opinion and we, of course can ask questions. You have no right however to question how someone feels, those are their feelings and that's that. If you can't comply or become rude, this discussion will be locked and you could possible be banned. I'm not trying to be mean, people come here for support and not to be questioned. Feel free to PM me if you would like. Have a great night

Ty Mammy!! I read that statement and my blood started to boil immediately.