Fibromyalgia Support Group

I agree with most of the other suggestion. I can't speak for everybody but I found out with my self and from reading most of us are TYPE A personalities and go and go and go and don't have good limits about what we should and should not do.

That is how my fibro got worse. I had it in a manageable way for 9 years but worked full-time, had a part-time business on the side. I worked myself to death and was always really hard on myself which caused tons of stress.

I can't do what I used to do after the flareup 4 years ago. I hate it- but it is what it is.

No matter how much you tell people around you about fibro they really don't understand it because they are not feeling what you are feeling.

I always had a perfect house etc. I don't live like a pig but I let dishes go one night if I am too tired to wash them.

After 4 years I am adjusting because I have to.

Fibro has changed your life and that is a loss and you have to accept that loss so you don't feel guilty about everything.

I'm 42, used to do aerobics in my prime almost every day and now it takes ME 3 days to put up my tree.

To be frank, the heck with what everyone else thinks. Working 7 days a week is not good for someone with fibro. I used to do it and think I could handle it but it screwed me up.

Can you talk with a therapist? Mine helped and is still helping me deal with what I can and can not do.

Just think- it is only 20 days away so it will be over before you know it.

Hang in there.. we understand

Snoopy,

Im so sorry you are having such a hard time! You deserve a day off from life. Your family should understand that this is really not something you can control. If you dont take time to get better, its going to make it harder on you in the long run. I know its easier said than done, especially with doing the holidays at your house. I will keep you in my thoughts. Im here if you need a shoulder sweetie!

Soft hugs,

Amanda

snoopy,

I'm sorry you have to go through this,but you are not alone about the holidays,i have felt this way for almost 8yrs since my mom died.but i put a smile on myface for my sonon these holidays.you ned to tell the family that you aren't able to do what you use to be able to do,and you need help.

Bernadette

Hey there snoopy! Gosh hun I'm sorry to hear your going through this...I cringe at the holidays too most of the time, but for different reasons. My mother likes to get dramatic and we usually end up fighting. My kids are all about what they are getting for presents, and the financial aspect is a stressor every year.

Now, I totally agree with what everyone else has said! I have finally put my foot down with most things around the house. Tell them all you are on strike and if they want anything, and I do mean ANYTHING, done they need to pitch in and help. Leave the tree untouched. If anyone says anything just hand them the box of ornaments and tell them to fix what they dont like (although I REALLY liked Hamptons idea, lmao!) and if they want the ornaments on the tree bad enough they'll do it.

Put them second and you first. Do what you need to to make this easy on yourself. Just tell them that if they dont help you will feel worse and take it out on them, lol. OR, that your gonna run away if they dont help (the bahama's) and you'll be back after the New Year ONLY if they have the house spotless!!!

I just had to do this in September. A friend of mine flew me to Canada before I divorced my hubby. I told him exactly WHY I was going (besides that I wanted to see her of course) and that I wouldn't come back if things didn't get better. He really took it to heart, cuz he knew I was serious. Now things are back to the same old sh*t, but hey, it just might by you the time you need to get through the holidays.

What would happen if you just put your foot down and tell everyone that Christmas wasn't at your house this year and someone else needs to pick up the slack? (like hubbys cousin?)

Just my thoughts...

I'll come kidnap you if you want...hehehehe. They wont know what hit them! Then we'll create a randsom note, that you wont be returned until the list of chorse are done!!!

deanna I love your Idea. You can come kidnap me anytime. As far as not doing Christmas at all. Grandma is the only reason I continue to try and keep the family together. She's 87 and would be devestated if we weren't all together. I love her dearly even though she's my husbands grandmother she is like my own. when the sad day comes that she is no longer with us for the holidays the rest of them can kiss my you no what because then I will not do anymore.

Good for you hun! I do understand about keeping it up for Grandma...she must be very special! I'll be by sometime this week for the kidnapping! LOL.

Snoopy, dear, I did the same thing for my grandmother when she was alive. I did not have Fibro then, but I had a LOT of other physical problems and a family that could care less to help me with anything. No one in my family ever lifted a finger to help me...they just expected me to do ALL the holiday dinners, by myself. And, I DID. And, they were beautiful. And, my precious Grandma Rose LOVED them all. How I miss her...she passed away at 92, in my arms. I stopped doing all the fancy hoopla for the rest of the family who never appreciated all the work I always did for the holidays... now I please ME, and it's about time Hugs to you all! I would like to go somewhere and get pampered....can you swing by VA and pick me up, too? LOL! Give Grandma a big kiss for me!

Thanks guys for understanding. and of course you can come on the kidnap trip ellie. I don't think deanna would mind

oh, cool, thanks snoopy! What fun it would be..sigh..if only we could really do it! WE DO UNDERSTAND,though, we really do. Blessings, girl.

I know you guys do. You are the best. I appreciate all who have answered and reached out to me when I was feeling so low. You have all brought me back to where i need to be. (waiting at the curb for Deanna and Ellie to kidnap me)