spruce1
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Hello to all old and new!!! This illness really can take a tole on our lives, both emotionally and physically  ! I think one thing after having it for 22yrs, to be able to cope with it is to finally ACCEPT this is us now! It's harsh, but it will help the grieving....because we do grieve and then we are angry, frustrated and stressed out! It took me many years to realize I'm no longer the old Laura....she probably will never walk 3 miles a day or ride free on a horse ever again. I try to remember that maybe tomorrow will be better and when tomorrow comes and I'm not better, then I say will maybe tomorrow cause there's bound to be a day or so of some slight relief. It comes, maybe not as often as I like, but it comes. Then those real bad days, I cry some and just rock on my little 'ole rocker and try to watch TV so I don't blow my brains out (just kidding) but that is how you feel when you have migraines 24/7. I don't really know how to comfort others cause really what can a person say? We still suffer! But WE ALL do understand each other and it's good to have the support here and the encouragement to keep on going and that's what we need to do. Do you know why? Cause whether we see it or not, our families do need us. We still influence their life's, whether children, grandchildren or spouses and mates. If they love us, they take us as we are now! My daughter finally got that into my head when I was very suicidal. I told her I really didn't want to live any longer and that I have no purpose. I said some other 'down' things also. She let me know how important I am to her and her children. How, although I can't run and chase my grandbabies like I would like to do, I help them grow into good people. She was only 5 when I was hit with this and she knows what I've been thru. She claims, all though she hasn't been the easiest kid on the block, she swears without me and my help and my shoulders she would be lost!!! So my friends, just try real hard to keep in mind, that all though we may do little, we still have some importance in life and who knows, tomorrow may just be a bit better and that will help us to get thru another day, right? So stay strong and hang in there. Vent when you need to, cry and scream (in a pillow  to save everyones ears) when you need to but remember, your needed by ALL of us! Spruce |
