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04/18/2010 04:44 PM

Understanding FMs

Mrsdeh
 
Posts: 2
Member

How do you make your family understand FMS? I am always exhausted and in pain,all I want to do is stay at home and rest. I have to push myself in order to go to work. My family is important to me, but I don't enjoy being around friends and other family members because i don't feel well.
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04/18/2010 04:56 PM
MissStacey
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04/18/2010 04:57 PM
RedGirl
 
Posts: 1594
Senior Member

It is very very difficult to explain fibromyalgia to anyone, including family members. Miss Stacey (I think -- fibrofog) has some really good articles explaining fibro. Maybe you can get some of your family members to read those. I finally figured out that unless people have fibro, they are going to have a very difficult time understanding how you feel. But your family, who truly loves you, will eventually figure out why you feel so bad. I'm so sorry you are going through this and hope things get easier for you soon!

Many hugs and best wishes!

Red


04/18/2010 05:07 PM
Natalia5150
Natalia5150  
Posts: 3632
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awww honey, sounds you don't have sufficient pain control, or you are in one continual unenduringly painful flare.

Also sounds like your doctor isn't working with you. Have you told your doc what's going on?

Re: Your family, it is one of the biggest dilemmas that fibro folk struggle with. There are articles and books that can be given to family if you think they would read them. We will have suggestions for you in the regular area, but you are not alone. A lot of our members have problems with family, because , we don't look sick and most of those people cannot tell the diffferances in the eyes between normal and pain.

You have lots of friends to meet and lots of support to get, know that you are welcome and we are happy you are here!

hugs

Natalia


04/18/2010 05:22 PM
MissStacey
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Red lol we posted at the exact same time! Wink

04/19/2010 02:59 AM
Auntie3285
Auntie3285  
Posts: 9182
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Hello Mrs.,

Welcome to our group ~~~

I, too, have a problem getting family members (hubby in particular) to understand that I am feeling so badly and that I sometimes just don t want to be around other people at all. I want peace and quiet and to relax.

I am around people all day at work and sometimes other functions after work so when I come home, I want to pace myself and totally relax (not necessarily sleep or go to bed or anything like that) ... Kinda just leave me alone for awhile while I regroup !!!

Glad you re here and looking forward to getting to know you better soon ~~~

Marilyn


04/19/2010 07:57 AM
Mooky
Mooky  
Posts: 97
Member

It's almost as hard on our family as it is on us. My hubby is sympothetic most of the time but he gets really frustrated if I can't do things around the house because he works two jobs (I do too) and he has to do alot of things around the house as well. I try not to complain too much but if I don't say anything, he doesn't know how bad I'm hurting. It's an ongoing struggle.

04/19/2010 08:06 AM
jess998
jess998  
Posts: 130
Member

So true. It would be a lot easier if we looked sick. My aunt is the only person that can tell how I feel just by looking at my eyes. She has trigeminal neuralgia and really understands our pain. Be patient. It took my people awhile to get used to this.

04/19/2010 08:15 AM
RedGirl
 
Posts: 1594
Senior Member

I agree it would be much easier if we actually looked sick. How many times have we all heard, "Well, you look just fine!" grrrrrrrr Angry Afraid that ticks me off!

My daughter is very understanding -- unfortunately because of all her own health problems -- and I have one cousin who is understanding. One of my brothers constantly tries to come up with a way to "fix me" but at least I know he believes I have health issues. My dad is pretty understanding too. My mom tries but really doesn't get it. So some of the family are coming around, some not. Just takes time I think for us to accept what we have and then more time for others to do the accepting part.

Hugs,

Red


04/19/2010 08:19 AM
jess998
jess998  
Posts: 130
Member

I totally agree. It took me so long to accept that I can only be patient with others to understand. At least they are trying to understand, Red. Sometimes it makes me laugh when people try to "fix" us. It is very sweet and I do appreciate the concern, but most of us know more about fibro than our own docs do.
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