Fibro Challenges Online Support Group

So, I didnt take the Ami bcuz I have to take my oldest to his band competition. I am hurting so bad and nithing is helping. My back, shoulders, neck, feet, and knees feel horrible. I feel like one giant bruise. I HURT! I am frustrated so much I could scream! My arms hurt too. Babygirl wanted me to rock her to sleep. . . She's only 2, how could I say no. She needs me. She is already attached to Dad bcuz he does almost everything for her.

This is the part I hate most about fibro. It keeps me from being the kind of Mom I used to be. I don't get to go with my son on the fieldtrip today, it is an allday affair and would require me to sit for @least 6 hours, and be on my feet for abt 8 hrs, NOT HAPPENING! I can't sleep on my own natural tiredness, I need pills for that.

I am just in too much pain. I hate this feeling. I forgot my icy hot while @ the store. The heating pad isn't working. The narcs make me nauseated so I don't like to take them.

I feel a MAJOR FLARE coming on. I almost fell in the store today bcuz my knees were trying to "buckle". A close friend of mine is going thru a lot of pain right now, mentally and physically. I just need to shake this pain frenzy. It hurts, and I can take a lot of pain, always have, I grew up with most of these pains and just thought they were normal so I think that's why my pain tolerance is so high.

I hate that my memory is worth squat. I needed to get this off my chest. Please pray for as my faith is wearing thin on and off and that is the worst thing that could happen to me right now.

Thank you for listening. I wanted to make a diary entry, but my diary doesn't work for some reason.

My elbows hurt now, I'm done. . .

{{{{Kook}}}} If you ever feel like screaming, put a pillow over your mouth and just let 'er loose!!! I know when I am alone and feel like that, I will just stand in the middle of the room and yell, "Satan, I rebuke you...In the name of Jesus!" It feels sooooo good!

I know what you mean about missing out on your child's events. I have not gone to one baseball practice for my son. I'm sorta saving up for the games! He asked me last night if I was going today and I get an "aww, Mom, c'mon!" It hurts and makes us feel guilty and ashamed of ourselves.

BUT, we are NOT bad mothers. We do what we can, we love our children, and they know we love them. So, stop being so hard on yourself. Take a warm bath with epsom salts, put on some soothing music, light some candles, and let (Jesus aka Calgon) take you away. Seriously, give the pain and frustration over to Him!

Praying for you, sweetie!

Love and {Hugs}

Kim, thanx so much. I just get bummed and very discouraged sometimes. I hve always dealt with pain, physical, mental, emotiinal. There comes a time when u get drained, u get tired of having to "be strong".

I know that without full commitment to The Lord I will suffer even more until I come back, im just hving a rough time right now.

Thanx, Kim. I think I will have an early morning saltbath. After hubby wakes up.

I am going to get icy hot/ some kinda cream frm the stre this morn when I take my son to buy his camera befre his roadtrip. Forgot yesterday. . .

Need air, feel like Im smothering not liking the way my moods are all out of whack.

Hugs and more hugs,

KookKrumbled

Awww, Kookey, I'm so sorry to hear you're having such a rough time. I can sympathize, I've been having a tough time of it lately, too. My pain level has been off the charts lately, and I've been on an emotional roller coaster. I have a daughter who is almost 7, and I definitely empathize with you. There are so many times that I have to tell my daughter no because I simply don't have the energy, or I'm in too much pain. The guilt I feel is unreal. We all go through times of spiritual attack, sounds like you and I are experiencing that now. I'm new here, and have found it so comforting to hear from others who are going through the same things. I've seen you respond to a lot of others on here, encouraging and comforting them...it's your turn to be comforted for a little while. I ran across a couple of verses the other day...it was one of those miraculous things that I know with absolute certainty came from God himself. I just opened my devotional book, was going to look for where I left off last time, and opened it straight to some verses that spoke to the EXACT things I was struggling with. I'll list the verses here...I pray they comfort you and speak to you like they did to me. You're not alone...you have the people here on the forum, and more importantly, you have the comfort of the Lord. Here are those verses, check them out. I hope they bring you some comfort!

Mt 11:28-30, Josh1:5 & 1:9, Phil 4:6-7. I'm also including Jer 29:11... "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and no to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." This one wasn't one of the ones I ran across the other day, but it's one of my favorites. I hope you find these comforting. if not, and you want to tell me to go take a hike, well, that's ok too! I pray you're feeling better today.

Kook, don't ever feel bad for letting your feelings out. We all have times where we just feel miserable and tapped of energy and frustrated all in one. You just lean on us and your faith and that will get you through. I wish I could take your pain away, for you and for us all. Take a warm bath, try and relax and breathe.

Hi Mel, Nice to meet you and welcome to the family. If you have time under the forum tab is a category for introductions, would be great if you could tell us something about yourself so other members know we have a newer member. Look forward to getting to know you. I hope you pain lessens. Ann

kook ~ i feel so badly for you and i so understand the mom-guilt thing. just know that you are doing the very best that you can. hold on tightly to your faith, it's the only thing that gets me through times like these. i will be praying mightily for you. hold on kook, you'll get through this. we're all here to listen and you know we understand. massive hugs to you and your family.

kimba ~ i've done the exact same thing at the darkest of times, "satan, in the name of Jesus Christ, i rebuke you!" our God is an awesome God and is always there for us even though the evil one is trying to prove otherwise!

welcome, mmason!

Kookey, I'm so sorry you are hurting so badly and I will pray for your pain to subside. I'm not a mother and I can't imagine how difficult that can be. I'm so amazed at all of you mothers and really don't know how you do it!

Scream and yell and vent here all you want...that's why we are here. We have broad shoulders and totally understand where you are coming from! Gentle hugs and thoughts for you this weekend.

Thank you so much! I know it is no excuse to lean on, but in my deep depression I have leaned further away from HIM, instead of leaning on HIM and letting HIM carry me through this very brutal storm. I needed this talk with you all. Thank you. Appreciate it more than you know.

Mel, thank you. I will def print and look these up. You have a beautiful spirit.

Gail and Ann, thanx a million. If I could id fly over, pack you up and put you in my suitcase! Lol move to California! Yeah? Lol

HuggieWuggies!

SnookeyKookey

Hi Janell, thank you so much for the prayers. Much needed. Sometimes you just need support from caring people like yourselves. You all are amazing! Thanx for listening and understanding me and my crazy self.

Hugs,

RollercoasterKook

Oh Kook, your post makes me want to cry, because I know where you are, and how you feel, and how much guilt you carry for your family.

I could spend hours relating to you. But seeing as both of us are suffering from the fog I will just say this...

Remember its about the QUALITY of the time you spend with the kids, not the quantity. Just 'be there' with the kids, be in the moment, make sure that all of your attention is given to them for the short amount of time you have to give them right now. Your children won't remember all of the time that you spend with them or not, they will remember that the time that you CAN spend with them was special, and that you gave all of yourself to them in the time that you had to give.

I have mourned the loss of my ability to 'mother' so many times I have cried a river of tears. And it has taken me a long time to realise that as long as I give myself only to them, then it doesn't matter how long I actually spend with them.

Another thing I just thought of, what have you told the kids about your illness? What do they know? Do they understand? We did something with the kids really early on and it worked so really well. But I will have to come back and let you know soon. I have to go have dinner!!!

Big hugs hon. And its OK to vent and cry and hate they way you are. You gotta let it out otherwise it will eat you up.

K