Emotional Abuse Support Group

I have been in a relationship for 5 years, within the first week there were problems at first it was nice and i thought that this would be it. It started out with jokes that turned into name calling to accusing. Whats funny is most of the time I never know what the problem was but, it always was the same thing "I never showed any attention" is funny because when I did it was like I wasn't even though of. I tried to start school but, it was like school was taking up to much of my time for the s/o of mine. It only seemed that Money was the ting that would quiet my s/o. There had been many times of infidelity however I thought that I was the one to blame many times I found myself wondering what the heck is going on. I was led on many times, I thought that I made the mistake of saying "I'll be there when you need me" which went south because now its like when ever my s/o needed anything and I couldn't provide it I would have "backed down" on the deal...even though I knew that there were others I still choose to stay found out that my s/o was pregnant whats weird is it was the same guy that i seen my s/o around turned out not to be the father but that the ex boyfriend was I tried to stay however, with the past broken wounds building up, abuse I left, my s/o would say would say that they knew that i couldnt take it and they already knew that i couldnt take it and was upset because I left, i know that I am a victim as well as my s/o but it always seem like I was the one to blame for it all and at times I get confused I try to leave but, at times I get the feeling like I was the one that left or this is what I wanted WHY IS THAT!

Hi and welcome to the group! I am so sorry for all you have gone through. I amazed you made it through five years of that! First of all, with all the infidelity that was going on in your relationship, you should have yourself tested for STDs just to be on the safe side.

When jokes start turning mean and name-calling enters the picture, those are two huge red flags. A lot of times though, abusers will say we are being too sensitive or that we can't take a joke, but inside, you know it's NOT you.

I am unsure of a few things. Are you and your s/o still together? Also, why do you say your s/o is a victim too?

Below is a link to an article on emotional abuse that I usually give to new people on the board. It's very interesting and has a lot of good information. It's written by a woman, but you can change the gender references in the article as you read it.

http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/manipulator/ emotional_abuse.shtml

Welcome to the group. Meg is a good friend to me as I am also new to the group. Surprised to see a man here? Yep...it happens on the other side too.

Try going through it for 11 years...I did...and worse stuff happened. It took me to a very dark and lonely place. But today is a bright and sunny day for me as I am walking away from it.

I have not arrived yet, but it feels good to come out the other end still alive...

Hello and thanks to your response...the reason i say s/o is i don't know what to call her. Right now we are not together, we tried to "take it slow" but I believe that was a code word for sex. I believe that she is a victim because, of her upbringing we tried to talk but there was such a barrier of communication I just stopped. I don't know why i think she is a victim but I do a victim to her own self