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05/13/2012 01:47 PM

Disgusted and Disappointed on Mothers Day(page 2)

leigha83
leigha83  
Posts: 1352
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I'm an Advocate

So he came home for his break and I was taking a nap while the kids were down. I didn't even look at him when he walked in and then he leaned over me and asked if I had gotten the kids outside today. I just said yes and closed my eyes again. He tried to play it sweet and gave me some money so "you and the kids can go get ice-cream or something later". I didn't even respond to that.

I was relieved when he left again for work. I am so beyond disappointed.

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05/13/2012 03:32 PM
Meg1129
Meg1129Posts: 14599
Group Leader

Been there. I'm sorry that happened to you today. The worst part of it is that he still doesn't get it and his Mr. Nice Guy act is all about reeling you back in and making him feel better about himself after what he did to you today.

05/13/2012 03:56 PM
leigha83
leigha83  
Posts: 1352
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I'm an Advocate

I know. It sucks. I just appreciate all the support I get here. It has helped me tremendously to just get on here and vent my thoughts and feelings. I don't have anyone to talk to in "real life". Thanks for helping me out. Smile

05/14/2012 04:50 AM
WandaLynn
WandaLynn  
Posts: 990
Member

Happy Mother's Day!(late)

I never hold great expectations because I never know the mood my husband will be in on a particular day.However,cherish your kids...im sorry you had to go through that.It should have been your day!


05/14/2012 06:14 AM
john4114
john4114Posts: 225
Member

can't remember how many birthdays and Xmas's I havent got a present, or at least nothing I would count. yet one valentines day she spent the whole day yelling because I had bought her a brand of chocolates she didn't like.

It seems that she can forget things anytime she likes yet if I forget anything its a deliberate act on my part just to piss her off.


05/14/2012 07:51 AM
AutumnDreams
AutumnDreams  
Posts: 110
Member

My heart goes out to you. This sounds so familiar. 'Special' holidays (valentines day, mothers day, birthdays, etc) were always an extra pain and hurt...because even though we tell ourselves not to have expectations, we still, in our heart of hearts, do...we just crave to be cherished, is that so wrong? The backrub is classic. And the cruel, abrupt departure. But you are learning to recognize abuse, and that will help free you from his trap. Hugs!!!

Autumn


05/14/2012 11:57 AM
LifeAwaits
LifeAwaits  
Posts: 715
Member

My husband did buy me things because I made sure early on in our marriage he knew I had high expectations. The last few years were, "here I got you something so you can't complain" gifts. I would tell him what I wanted, give him plenty of advance notice, and send him the link to the cheapest place to buy it. He would end up buying the wrong thing and then complaining that it wasn't his fault because he didn't know and I'm too picky anyway.

I wasn't too picky, I picked him.


05/14/2012 01:47 PM
CindyLou041
CindyLou041  
Posts: 388
Member

My EA used to tell me *Why would I buy you somthing-your not MY mom* oh he thought he was SO funny.. Makes me sick

05/14/2012 01:52 PM
LifeAwaits
LifeAwaits  
Posts: 715
Member

Shows how abusive he is. I've always thought the kids do for the mom on Mother's Day and when the kids are little and need help with it, then the dad should help them and not do it instead of them.

05/14/2012 02:54 PM
leigha83
leigha83  
Posts: 1352
VIP Member
I'm an Advocate

So I went to be early last night and left for work without saying anything to him this morning. I got flowers at work today.

I told him thank you for the flowers when I got home and he apologized again for being a dick but I did tell him I was still hurt and felt like the only reason he bought me flowers is to make himself feel better. I told him I felt used and was deeply hurt by his actions. He said he is going to make it up to me....We shall see.

I want to believe he is really a good guy at heart and that this was just a "thing" but I have never been a great person on picking out non-abusive men so what the hell do I know. He is defiantly better than 100% of the other men I have been with. I just don't like mind games because...I will win..I have been playing this game for too long and I see the red flags a lot quicker than most.

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