Emotional Abuse Support Group

Hi everyone, I'm wondering if one ever "gets over" abuse, emotional/mental, caused by a parent with a mental illness. I've never had a "normal" relationship, been married twice, and have no interest in making friends because that means letting someone in close to me.

I have bipolar disorder, PTSD, am on meds and do therapy. But really, do the memories and feelings of worthlessness ever stop? I need to talk to people who know what it's like; my therapist is educated about it and knows how to help me in some ways, but I'm reaching out to those in the know.

Thanks!

Are you still living with this parent? If so, then it's going to be hard to get over it when a fresh supply of abuse is always delivered to take the place of whatever you've managed to get rid of. If not, then there is hope. How happy are you with the progress you're making with your therapist? If you've been seeing him/her for a while and are still feeling worthless, then maybe you should think about finding someone else. Not all therapists are good.

As for "getting over" the abuse, I think I managed to, but it takes a LONG time and a lot of therapy. I've gotten to the point now where I can see the positives in my life that have come as a result of having been abused. For example, I'm much more patient, understanding and forgiving of others because I've been abused. I know what it's like to be on the receiving end of judgment, condemnation and unforgiveness, so I can see where I've become a better person because of it. That doesn't mean I'd want my children to ever be in an abusive relationship or that I'd willingly sign on for another one, but I think being able to find some positives in it really helped me to heal. However, it took me about 10+ years to get to the point where I could even begin to consider the idea that some good may have come from it. Of course, I'm a slow learner sometimes and I was without some essential resources that we have here, like Bancroft, a kick-ass support group and a national hotline number you can call anytime just to talk.

Hello and thanks for your reply! No, I live on my own and am now in the position of helping out my folks, who are both in their 80's and not in the best of health. I forgave my dad a long time ago, for my own mental health. But the feelings are still there. I've been working mainly on learning to live and work with my bipolar illness and haven't spent a lot of time with my therapist on dealing with the past. I'm happy with the progress I've made so far. I agree with your positive outlook on abuse-I have a lot of empathy for people who are hurting and am anything but judgmental. Thank you for pointing out the positives!