...So I am creepily starting to feel contentment, now, how we live, 1 month and 2 weeks as roommates--not husband and wife.... Still-no word on any job----well just the one I do not want, it would be out of desperation, am I not desperate enough? I get responses and when I reply the do not reply back, so frustrating......I do not mind disabled adults, but fear I would burn out and be miserable doing that 40 hours a week. I have a birthday party to plan for---with not help from EA H, I am solo on this one, again, as usual, --but it is a distraction from all other things I guess...the job thing really bugs me, I feel if I got a job my self esteem would rise and then there would be more hope...then I could go on and my plan would work, but without a means to support myself everything else has to wait----if I work on the Legal Aid and the apt it is all too soon, because my feet are in cement right now, putting the carriage before the horse so to speak, doing all that makes me so anxious. A $10 an hour job is what I would need to make it, $8 I would sink. Trying not to pressure myself too much.
Keep at it! You will find something one way or another, even if it is only temporary. I'm glad you are defining some boundaries living as roommates though (as awkward as that might be at times). Just that amount of emotional and literal space will give you some room to heal!
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