Dysfunctional Families Online Support Group

I know I've explained about my first Appaloosa Horse I raised,then suddenly she was taken from me too soon. She was born June 14, 1978, and she was taken from me due to a drunk driver August 18, 1985. She was only seven years old, and she was five months pregnant. I took a double lose the same day. I've been in tears off and on, which seems to happen a lot, since the day I lost her. I am like this on her birthday and the day she was taken from me. If she'd of passed away of natural causes, I know I wouldn't of taken it so hard. A lot of people wouldn't understand why I'm this way, due to they don't know how a bond is with an human and any kind of animal. Angie was more than a horse to me. She was part of my life since day one of her life, and she was so very special to me. I'm in tears as I'm typing this, have been off and on all day, and it won't get better till after her birthday. It's like she was just here, then all of a sudden gone. We had such a special bond. She was the first horse I trained to ride, didn't have a trainer ride her at all, I did it all myself. Nobody helped me raise her other than her Momma. I had so many plans for her and I. I wanted to raise babies out of her, and show her, neither happened.

My Mom and I was enjoying our Sunday ride on our horses and we did it so many times, never thought I'd lose her just on a leisurely Sunday afternoon ride. We were riding to my best friend's place, which I've done a lot without incident. As we got close to my friend's, a pickup was heading toward us, and he was going a little fast, Angie started panicking. I signaled for him to slow down, he didn't. He sped fast by us, Angie spooked, I went flying off of her, she was running the other way, and all I could see was her hoof barely hanging on and only skin was holding it on. I knew she'd have to be put down, no doubt. That memory has stayed with me since it's happened. My Mom ran her horse to my friend's to see if they could get Angie in the trailer, but they knew it wouldn't happen, as much as they wanted to. They had to call the vet, by then, my friend came and got me, brought her to he place, and she had some friends there and had no clue why I was so upset, I couldn't even talk due to how bad of shape I was in emotionally. My friend finally took me back home, by then Mom was back at my place. My daughter was only four years old then, and she was such a good girl, and was there for me. We did talk to a cop, I wanted to press charges, but was talked out of it. He then said I should go to the hospital to get checked out. I didn't want to, I wasn't hurt, I was more emotionally a mess than anything. No consoling worked for me, and I cried every day for a month after that, even thought I got another horse, but didn't want anything to do with her for a while, due to she wasn't my Angie. I didn't raise her, she was a yearling when I got her, and I never got close to her or any other horse for that matter other than a son out of that mare, and he's in NY. I miss him like crazy, but he still isn't my Angie. You'd think by now I wouldn't be like this, but when I lost her, it was like I lost my child. I kid with my daughter and tell her, that's her sister. She understands the bond I had with her. One that can never be broken no matter what. Sorry this is so long, but I needed to get it out. The tears just hasn't been stopping the last few days. I'll be okay, but I just get like this as her birthday approaches. My husband is used to it, and lets me cry it out on his shoulders. I am thankful for that.

I'm going to put the link to Angie's special page I dedicated to her. You'll need a tissue. On top of the page is the pony I had first, then below that one is my second horse, then below is Angie, her registered name is Widder's Angel. I named her after her sire Widder's Gold. Thank you all for being such wonderful and caring friends. Here's the link to Angie's page: http://www.donnaappaloosahorses.com/PhotoAlbum.html

I love you all. I'll be okay, just having a rough time right now. GBHugs, Donna

Oh Donna Hug Hug, I just read the web page,snif, What a beautiful way to honor your girl. The poem was very touching. I understand about loss, of a fur baby, Chip, who was my only friend for many years. And of course Gizmo. You should be very proud of your self, she is a beauty. Hug Hug her baby would have been to. It's great you posted her lineage.

Post edited by: claphappy, at: 06/09/2012 05:40 PM

Thank you, Clap. I felt that was the least I could do for my girl. No other horse could ever take her place. My Dad told me that if I knew of a horse I really wanted, him and Mom would buy her for me. When I had Angie at the breeder's, they showed me one of their foals called Cashs' Yellow Rose, she looks a lot like Angie, except she had a nice Appaloosa blanket with spots on her rump. I liked her a lot when I seen her, and didn't think I'd end up owning her. Her price was way too high for me to even think about buying her. I called the breeder and told them what happened to Angie, and bless their hearts, they dropped her price a lot, and my folks bought her for me. I was excited at first, but not as excited as you'd a thought a buyer would be of the new horse. I couldn't get close to Rose, and still had a hard time for a long time to even want to work with her of give her much attention, and when I did, the tears would start due to I know why I ended up with her. If I didn't lose my Angie, I'd on not had her, and that's when I got real serious, and turned my horse hobby into a business. No horses were allowed to ride on the gravel road again. I started showing at the regional and state levels, to qualifying Rose for the Appaloosa World Championship shows. She was never ridden on the gravel road. If I wanted to trail ride her, I took her to my folks and rode her on their land as they have over 120 acres. She was mainly shown a lot till I retired her, then used her for a broodmare, and she produced many foals for me, including her son that is the only other horse that I got attached to, and I kept him a stallion when I owned him. He was so easy for me to manage and work with. He took care of me, and protected me a lot. He knew my at that time husband was dangerous for me, and he despised him, and would rather strike him down than tolerate him. I ended up selling him due to going through a nasty divorce. I didn't want any of the horses to be in the middle of a divorce, as I have heard so many awful stories on what happened to them, and that's the only reason I sold him. Long story, you all probably don't want to hear. In the end he ended up getting castrated and ended up at a nice show home in NY, was fantastic in dressage, and placed well. He since has been retired, and is at a forever home now. SO hard to believe he's 19 years old, and I did raise him from day one of his life. I raised many foals, sold most, but only a few had special places for me, such as Angie and Cash. At least he's living a long happy life, not like my Angie, when her's was cut short due to a drunk driver.

It's those special furbabies that we can never forget. I did a lot of horse pedigree research on lots of different breeds. I loved doing it. Angie and well as Rose goes back to the famous race horse Man O' War, and they were Appaloosa horses. I worked hard with my horses and put my heart and sole into them. I'll never forget that day and I'll never forgive that drunk.

I love the name of your furbaby, Gizmo and Chip, Clap. My daughter named one of our barn cats Gizmo, and I had an Appaloosa Colt I nicknamed Chip, due to his blanket on his butt looked like he had chocolate chips in it. lol Yup, I loved the spotted horses. GBHugs, Donna

Hi Donna

We love all of our little animals and big ones too. I tend to get to close. When I had no choice but to take my Doberman to put her down. Severe Arthritis in her feet, couldn't walk anymore. So I was on the way to the vet with her..her name was Baby Doll...

I stopped at a sub place to get her last meal. I asked the boy for a roast beef one..He said dont you want anything on it? I said maybe a little ketchup ...he laughed at me and said you will ruin our sandwich that way...I said no , its for my Dog..its her last meal and I know what she likes. he said Oh I'm so sorry...is that her looking up? I said yes...clearly he could see my tears in my eyes, He went out and we both fed her ...she loved it...I walked back in...and said how much do I owe you...He said nothing, you gave me something to think about today...on how many pets are not cared for , but she is beautiful for 15 yo...I said thank you..so sad as I drove to get her the shot...

Love you . I know this pain...I am so sorry Donna,,,but we all do care very much..

Patty

Thank you, Patty. I know you all do. I'm so sorry about Baby Doll and anybody that has to eventually put their furbabies down. It's such a hard decision for all of us. We all love them like they are our children. So many are cruel to animals, and it's people like us that try as hard as we get to take the best of care of our furbabies, and give them tons of love. That was so sweet of that fellow. Shows he had a great heart as well. I love you and everybody here. Thank you!! I hope one day as her birthday approaches that I don't get like this, but it's so hard. Last year I almost made it without tears, but by the evening of her birthday that didn't happen. I cried on my husband's shoulder. He knows me and knows why, and doesn't ask. We've had our flag up since Memorial Day weekend, and due to it being Flag Day coming up, as well as Angie's birthday, we keep it up, and it stays up till after the 4th of July. It's a comfort to me, as she was my Flag Day baby. GBHugs, Donna

I think that any one with a heart for animals knows what you are feeling.

Loved your pics page, im sure there are a lot of fond memories.

My dad was raised with work horses all his life up untill before he got married and left the farm.

He loved his horses, and still talks about them. There house is full of horse pictures and statues.

I have a 14+ yr old sheltie that I look at with lots of admiration and love, we have been together a long time, I love this dog and know that soon there will be a little piece of my heart that will be taken from me, but I will never forget her, the bond can not be broken.

Take care Donna and thanks for sharing your memories.

Thank you, sifted. My house sounds like your Dad's. I still collect model horses, mainly Appaloosa and famous race horses. I have ribbons and trophies I've won, well all the trophies, and part of the ribbons, as I have lots of them, but the resent ones are up. My Dad built me a shelf for my horses and trophies. Just something I enjoy. None from my Angie, as we were never given the opportunity. The two we won was with Saddle clubs, the clubs kept them.

I hope that days doesn't happen any time soon for your shelty. Hope she's doing real well and is healthy. It's amazing how much TLC the furbabies get.

Chloe, the bunny I got this year has really turned into a wonderful bunny. The gal I got her from would never know she's the same one I got from her. Lily has turned into a beautiful bunny as well. We all give our animals the best that we can. I hope you have several years left for your sheltie. I'm here for you all as well. I'll be okay, I just get this way before her birthday and before the day I lost her. It's so hard, and I'm sure grateful to have such caring friends. I love you all. Sombody posted this image in FB, it's beautiful, and want to share it with you all. GBHugs, Donna

That is so true, not to change your topic but I have noticed more latley people not slowing down for animals crossing the road, almost seem like they are speeding up. I was behind a woman awhile ago who speed up to hit a crow, and just today I watched another woman aproach a squirl traped on the road, she did not stop or nothing, the squirl was inches from bitting the dust. Pisses me off!!!

People who treat animals like shit treat people like shit too, thats a fact.

Shifted

We just witnessed the opposite. Traffic was slowing down, the problem? A woman in a bright pink top was walking a mama Canadian goose and 4 babies across the road. Just as they got to the median the the Mama changed her mind and wanted to go back. One little baby could not jump the curb once they did get back across, so this woman helped it up. The Mama goose was O.K. with it.

If your saying is true I want to be her friend.

A number of years ago a couple of geese set up their nest by the entrance of a JCP in a large mall. They made their home on the top of a trash can, the kind with a sand ashtray on it. They closed down the entrance, yellow taped the area off. It even made the news paper when they had 3 little babes.

As much bad as there is out in the world toward animals, I have to believe there is also good. Just look at the way we treat our fir babies.

I agree, Clap. I remember seeing something similar here in MO. The traffic was stopped so that a Momma duck and her babies could cross the road to safety. There's still a lot of wonderful and caring hearts out there. The problem today is what used to be places for animals are now homes for people, and they haven't adapted to the change. Like the bears being seen in places they normally aren't being seen in. All I say for the one they showed on the news, the pool is the bear's. He/She can have it. lol

sifted, a lot is true too, those that are abusive to animals are very abusive to people too, so sad, and people like that shouldn't have animals at all. I've seen lots of that myself as well, and it gets to me as well. Thank God most of them don't have animals. There's some out there that totally neglect them as well, and have no business having them.

Where my folks live, they've had a lot of animals, cats and dogs just dropped off. Of course my folk's put on the radio station about the animal, to see if anybody lost them, and once they get permission, they'll take them to the vet have them spayed or neutered, get their shots, and they just stay at the farm and get the best of care as long as their there. You can tell I'm from a family that loves animals. My folk's won't let them suffer either. Mom and I had to make that hard decision on our 31 year old mare the Tuesday after the Memorial Day weekend, about three years ago, we both decided we're not going to allow her to suffer anymore, she had a long weekend, and we both could tell by her eyes she was ready to go over the Rainbow Bridge. We had the vet out, he said she was having heart failure. He said he could give her medication, it might help her she might live another month or so, or another day. We both told him, no, she had a long hard weekend. I led ole Metat where Mom wanted her Laid To Rest. I told Metat how much we all loved her, Mom said her good byes to her as I did, then I gave the vet her lead rope, and she was quietly put to sleep. No more suffering for our old gal. Mom and I had a long weekend with her as well. We had her for 29 years, she was one of the best horses ever. Another no trainer touched her. she was another easy to train horse, never had a buck in her, never reared, sweet as a horse can be. I'll be facing that with Rose, she's now 28, and Moonlight, she's 27. Once we make an commitment with our horses or any animal, they are with us to live out their lives. I know the day will be coming, but this time, Rose will be me and my daughter's decision, a first for my daughter, a second for me. I want Rose taken to my folk's farm, as she lived there most of the time with ole Metat, they were pasture buddies. When Metat was laid to rest, the vet said to bring Rose to her to say her good byes, and she let us know when she was done, but walking away, and I just went with her. That's how we ware with our animals. Moonlight is an old Arabian mare my friend let me have, due to she was afraid to sell her to just anybody, she knew how I was with my horses and animals, and was relieved when I said yes. Moonlight has been through a lot when she was young, she was starved and abused as foal, reason she was at the rescue farm, and my friend bought her for showing, but due to her nice foals, she never made it to the arena. I was hoping to get a baby out of her, but due to a cyst, not cancerous, she can't have anymore, but I was fine with that, and with her having such a rough time as a young horse, she's just a pasture ornament, and pretty one that that. She's happy, and that's what I like to see. Sorry, I got carried away again, but it just shows, there's a lot of good hearted people out there. GBHugs, Donna