Dual Diagnosis Support Group

Hi

I am writing about my ex BF who is BP and has alcohol and AD dependency

He is also a practicing surgeon who is a master at covering up his issues. Last August I finally referred him for a Med Society Intervention for treatment. He went away for one week-end then was evaluated in patient for another 2-3 weeks. He returned late sept. October 1st I got an email from the interventionist sayign

"a referral was in progress but no decisions had been made".

Well he is out operating and drinking just as much

Question: has anyone ever talked their way out of rehab. IS this common

How does it work.

thanks

Hi, rhon, welcome. I have not personally talked myself out of rehab but I know it is possible. And it is common for those of us who drink and abuse drugs to be able to lie our way out of such situations. We can lie to ourselves so it makes lying to others easy. I hope he gets the help he needs in the end. There is a group for Friends and Family of Alcoholics that you might find helpful on MDJunction. Welcome.

I tried to talk my way out of rehab and could have left at anytime because I went there volunterily. Other people left but I am thankful I stuck out the 30 and have since found a good aa support group here and a wonderful sponser. You can only do so much to help someone, if he isn't ready for the help or doesn't think he needs it no matter how much he does he is going to buck the system. I hope he seeks help before he harms someone or looses his license to practice medicene.

Yes! You can talk your way out of rehab ... you can even lie on your evals and make them think that you don't need the help to begin with. It isn't like they hook up a lie dector to you and ask you what they ask. One of the questions they ask is " do you think you have a problem" and if it is something legal you are abusing then more often then not they will use your judgement and go with it. You can not help a person that doesn't want to help there self!

yes u can,my freind one time did it ,we were all messed up on meth aN he talked his way out of it,i lived right around the corner ,he talked me into goin back in there to get his stuff...he tells me "if they try keep me here ,you gotta help me fight our way out".so that was the plan,he was a big mexican,i wasnt small either,they let us go.

he died about 5 or 6 years later ,from drinkin an druggin all our lives...

It looks like he somehow got out. He is completely in denial, has zero insight

is convinced I did this to hurt him and will probably never speak to me again

I dont think there is anything I can do. The last time he almost got caught

was when he operated while drunk, perforated a pts spleen and the pt died

To this day no one knows he was drunk and as a surgeon -somehow addicted to Wellbutrin because it makes him manic, he will continue like this indefinately. I went to the med sociery but dont have the heart to turn him into the Dept of health because they will take his license.

its all just awful

I'm sorry you are in such a tough spot. I'm not sure what I'd do in your place. But I think that if he is such a danger to others than he may need to have be turned into the Dept. of Health. He should not be allowed to harm others. None of us should. That's my opinion, I'm not a dr. or psychiatrist or therapist, just a recovering alcoholic. I've seen a lot of people die from this disease over the years, both directly, drinking/drugging themselves to death and indirectly, drunk drivers and such. I always think it's terrible and truly needless. I hope your friend comes to his senses soon before he does harm more people. Good luck.

Im going to have a mutual friend try going to dinner with him to see what we can see has been happening. As I wrote above- he was gone for a few weeks then came back.

Im sure if they are letting him work they assessed him as non impaired. He is a master at faking sobriety and sanity- then going home- or out and being completely manic.

Its a family disease. His cousin wrote a book on it.

They are all borderline. Bipolar and substance abusers.

Google "poisoned love" and u can see the book - its written by his first cousin

I second that you can't help someone that doesn't want help. I am in the middle of a similar situation with a friend of mine right now. It is your decision whether to report him or not. He might not loose his license if he gets the proper treatment. Someone within the hospital should be notified (in my opinion) and it can be anonymous. My heart goes out to you. Put it in Gods hands, if you believe. Attending alanon may help you.