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12/23/2011 09:07 PM

the holidays

soulsurvivor
soulsurvivor  
Posts: 170
Member

no plans cmas eve Oh boy mayB catch a mttg.

Ermm I do have plans for Christmas Day, I just hope my family doesn't IRK me beyond belief,,,,,Happens alot. They don't get IT or ME

but my daughters are so-so in the get-it department...BUT NOW I GOT my 1yr old grandson. THE JOY of my life. AND HE 'totally' DOES NOT CARE<lol

I plan on buddying up& playing games with him OR the dog is GOOD company too.<and not at all judgemental Ahahahahaha

Dizzy

Deb

Post edited by: soulsurvivor, at: 12/31/2011 04:08 PM

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12/24/2011 09:45 PM
kball
kball  
Posts: 940
Group Leader
I'm an Advocate

You are so right Deb my cat doesn't judge either.Haha. Your grandson loves you unconditionally,the truest form of love there is. Enjoy it. I hope everything goes well for you. Thinking about you.

Your friend,

Kris


12/25/2011 05:53 AM
soulsurvivor
soulsurvivor  
Posts: 170
Member

thanks Kris,

SO last nite i JUST STAYED HOME So what?lol so what if it was cmas eve we don't really celebrate till today

& Yes my mygradson & my grand-dog we'll have a SMASHING TIME.

And my faithful companion pur-pur will be waiting at home to great me with an unconditional...meow LOL

You have good day too.

Your friend,

Deb

Post edited by: soulsurvivor, at: 12/31/2011 04:06 PM


12/25/2011 08:46 PM
kball
kball  
Posts: 940
Group Leader
I'm an Advocate

Good Evening Deb,I wanted to see how the day went for you? Ok you had a rough last night,but you know what ,you did it girl,you stayed sober,you did not get high, did you? So it was better than last Christmas eve huh? Way to go. Good for you ,for calling the hot line. it is healthy for us to cry,we have to acknowledge the feelings we have inside and then let our selves feel them,(crying) then we let them go,so we don't get high again. So cry your heart out if you need to. Listen when you need to talk come on MDJ and send me a personal message and my tool bar will let me know I have a message. Ok then we can chat. If you want we can try to set a time to get together on here and chat. let me know . Remember Deb the disease will play tricks on you and your mind it will make you feel lonely and sad and suicidal anything to get you to use drugs again. it is cunning,baffling and powerful. I had a nice Christmas. Goodnight.

Know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.

your friend,

Kris


12/26/2011 05:18 AM
soulsurvivor
soulsurvivor  
Posts: 170
Member

well "i lived through it"

came home last nite wasn't in the house 3 min. straight to bed

it s really allll just to much for me putting up a good front,polite conversation for hours on end

not trying to rain on anyones p[arade

but I HATE the holidays

And it behan long ago

i d say 20 years ago back when i was in my addiction

Anywho still here in one piece & THANK 'GOD" its behind me now Sad

Thanks for askin....LOL

Deb


12/27/2011 01:46 AM
DAngelo
DAngelo  
Posts: 111
Member

Glad you got through it. It is the worst time of year I know for resisting, but then again, so is summer! Hey ho, we are continually faced with temptation and we could always find an excuse to go off the rails but we get through it. Well done, it is a real acheivment to get through it in one piece without giving in. xx

12/30/2011 07:09 AM
soulsurvivor
soulsurvivor  
Posts: 170
Member

thanks for the vote of confidence:I WAS REALLY WORRIED

bc last year Cmas eve2010;was when i went off the-rails-going-mach1 LOL

i suffer from bipolar&borderline<one of the characteristics of borderline-pesonality-disorder IS FEAR OF ABANDONMENT, so the day started out O.K. i was&had bin sober for YEARS. Was in a relationship,all of a sudden he jumps up first thing Cmas eve morning & is going to help his sister HAS NO IDEA when he'll be back....O.K., So i call later NO ANSWER i call repeatedly No answer,top that off my older daughter i see once a year comes to my mothers around 6pm as Cmas eve is supposed to be 'happening'.but she states "i can only stay a minute" OVER THE EDGE WENT I called up a friend & basically hid from Cmas by going on a VERY expensive binge. LOL,LOL not funny, i know.

So as you can see I was c o n c e r n e d.

HOW ARE THINGS WITH YOU?

I'm good back to my "only way to successfully stay sober technique, Work-OUT & N.A.

Deb

Post edited by: soulsurvivor, at: 12/31/2011 04:10 PM


12/30/2011 11:09 AM
DAngelo
DAngelo  
Posts: 111
Member

I am good. I am filling my time by going to the sales, stopping for coffee (and too many cigarettes), cups of tea, people watching, more tea.. then window shopping when money runs out.. Filling evening time on this forum and reading and getting in bed, proud of another day on the straight and narrow!! Sad I know but it is early days. xx

12/31/2011 09:51 AM
soulsurvivor
soulsurvivor  
Posts: 170
Member

Another day on the straight & narrow....is 'a good day'

i like excercise bc It replaces unhealthy activity w/ healthy my gym membership is like $25 a mo. only.

but hey whatever works

I went to 'a' N.A. mttg yesterday....

I LIKE 'the program' bc it worked for me.

AND the ACTIVITIES pot-luck etc, I really do enjoy them

I first got intoduced to A.A. back about 2000 when i got 2 DUI's back to back.Umm Humm

Anywooozer A.A. was on my list of probation conditions

So I went

Sincerly,

Debbie

Ps do U do mttgs @ all?

always edit bc typos LOL

Post edited by: soulsurvivor, at: 12/31/2011 04:03 PM


12/31/2011 05:04 PM
kball
kball  
Posts: 940
Group Leader
I'm an Advocate

First I always have to edit cuz of typos also...LOL I do the AA meeting. i love them. my home group is a wonderful bunch of people. They are AA and alanon mixed and I like that aspect of both sides. They welcomed me even tho I was an addict. They loved me until I could love myself and still do love me. The program I learned thru AA has been so valuble to me in my recovery. It has been a big part why I have been able to stay clean and am able to live happy being sober and clean. i like how they teach us to work on ourselves so we can improve and change our bad behaviors. Without change we go back to the same old behaviors...Drinking and Drugging.

Kris

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