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11/07/2011 06:08 PM

What Triggers You?

kball
kball  
Posts: 940
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I'm an Advocate

The sound of lighters flicking triggers me to think of my crack addiction. Halloween and seeing the little kids triggered my depression,made me sad and made me miss my kids and think about all the time I lost with my sons that I won't ever get back due to my illness and addiction. I get depressed because they are not in my life ,they still can not forgive me.
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11/08/2011 07:44 AM
anamore
anamore  
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I am so sorry to hear that your children can't forgive you, I hope one day they will understand the horrors of addiction and forgive you. I know my daughter gets pissed at me if I self medicate or change my rx schedule, But she has been a great support and has helped me stay clean.

I miss the feeling you get when you snort coke and it goes down your nasal passages, now when I have a cold and a runny nose, it brings back that feeling, its like I crave that feeling more than I crave the coke, Sounds crazy, but that is how some drugs affect you


11/08/2011 09:58 AM
steve571
steve571  
Posts: 2695
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the shaking of pill bottles trigger me.the thoughts of rhe past wich trigger the feelings of the past wich intern triggers the depression of the past all are a huge trigger.presently im working a 12 step program to help with those things of the past....one day at a time. also some music are a huge trigger. fighting with familly ...my wife an kids ...is trigger....i dont like conflict...get to tired is a trigger.

11/09/2011 05:31 PM
kball
kball  
Posts: 940
Group Leader
I'm an Advocate

It has taken me 3 yrs to let go of the past,I mean enough to where I can at least find peace in the present. I now have a calmness inside my head and heart that is wonderful. No chaos anymore. I truly think the chaos of thoughts and emotions were going on because I had one foot still in my past. Yeah some music will throw me right back there fast. I live in Green bay and they have packer tailgate parties every football game,i mean partying every yard and parking lot you see,and grilling out and this reminds me of the days when we use to load our coolers of beer and head to the beach and bar-b-que and drink til the sun went down. It makes me want to drink sometimes ,I call a friend or use other tools I have learned in AA. Triggers can be hard and dangerous. The thing is they can sneak up on us at anytime so we have to stay alert and smart!!!
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