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07/17/2011 07:42 AM

new to group: mother of relapsing heroin addict

lrb1952
Posts: 1
New Member

My 23 year old daughter is a heroin addict who has struggled for one year, with many relapses and countless crises,, and finally completed an entire year clean- she got a job , we helped her buy a car etc. She recently relapsed 2x in as many weeks and ended up back in detox. We have spent obscene amounts of money trying to get her the best treatments/sober living that we can and I am just devastated. I almost started to believe that she was going to make it...I cant imagine how she can ever overcome this.. In my heart I don't beleive that she is going to make it

We have the opportunity to place her in a long term (1 yr) situation that will be very expensive, but is being offered to us at a very fair price if paid up front all at once. The recovery center is one that she has been connected with for the past year, and everyone there has become very invested in her - and she in them. But she has walked out of other places before, and this is the last thing we can do for her-- I am so scared to commit because she is so unreliable. SHe syas that she wants to do this--- but what does that mean coming from an addict. I am so confused.

Part of me is so angry at her that I just want to do nothing...but the other part of me doesnt want to take the chance that she will become a train weck if w dont help her and I will regret my decision for the rest of my life.

What would other people so?????

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07/17/2011 09:57 AM
jenny1978
jenny1978  
Posts: 2599
VIP Member

If she really want something different and she is having problems with the cravings, she could always try taking Suboxone. It is a partial opiod antagonist, but it is nothing like methadone. I took it on and off for years and it saved my life. I've been sober for 5 years this October. Maybe talk to her about this situation and see why it is that she feels that she is relapsing. I'm here if you need me.

07/21/2011 04:15 AM
calebtucci
Posts: 18
Member

As a former heroin addict who quit cold turkey I think that you should foremost realize that no decision should be made out of feeling guilted into it.. There are addicts that recover after getting the right treatment.. there are also addicts that recover after they realize that their family has run out of resources to help them and that they trully have hit rock bottom. Either decision you make could be what spurs her on to sobreity. Also if she is not ready to quit no matter what you do she will remain an addict.. You have done so much, no one can EVER say that you didnt do your best.. I guess what im trying to say is that I hope you can realize that neither decision says you love your daughter more than the other.. You have been a wonderful mother trying to help your daughter.. Please make this decision knowing that either way you have done your best.. If at all possible I hope that you can step away from all guilty feelings and know that you are and always will be a loving mother regardless of this decision..Hang in there..
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