Domestic Violence Online Support Group

me and my husband stay together for one and half year. from very first day he start abuse me, everytime he was angry with me, i was thinking what happened to him, every time he said, you didnt do this you didnt do that, and i ,i was like that ok will do all that what he wants, everyday i start to do what he wants, but at the end of day he was same, i cried all that one and half year nights, in morning again i tried but result was nil,he didnt talk to me for more that one min. in all that time period, or that one min was full of hate, anger, abusive words, i begged him to not to do this with me, he said i didnt like ypu, i didnt love you, he pushed me so many time, i spend time in begging him, crying in bathroom,room, he ignored me, he wanted to spend time with his aunty,he and his aunty they are possesive for eachother, he thretend me, he did mentally torture, as a result we sepreated ,i got severe depression ,i wa son medication for one year, in this period i missed him alot, still i miss him, i loved my husband a lot ,he is everything for me, still i didnt forget that mentally torture, but inspite of all that i love him ,everytime means everytime i think about him, he is in my heart, i talk to him everyday, how are you, are you still angry with me and why, this type of talks. i know he is not in my life ,but how and when can i forget him, these things made me crazy, sometime suicide thoughts comes bcz i feel he is not with me, can you help me in this from so much time this thing distrubes me,i am helpless, i joined some councellings also but.help me.

Post edited by: anju, at: 05/14/2012 10:09 AM

anju,Please get a copy of the book "Why does he do that?Inside the minds of angry controlling men."by Lundy Bancroft.It is available at most bookstores,libraries and at amazon.com.You will find the book very helpful.Stay in counseling.That was a smart idea on your part.It takes time to let go of an abusive relationship.There are several theories to explain why it is so difficult for many people.One of them is called "traumatic bonding" and the other is called "Stockholm syndrome."You can read more about those by googling those terms.There is alot of information about them on the internet.Most important is to have no contact with your former abuser.The less contact you have with him the less confused and conflicted you will feel.

HUGS.Lanna

he said that i dnt want to give you divorce,its your choice, hw wanted me in life bcz he had to show in society as a married person but actually he wanted to live with another woman,when i reached upto peak mentally disturebed position then he tried to stop me with his anger, with showing that he is doing efforts to save relation,but inside he was like that ok i did my duty formally from next day he was same, again he was same with me, and different with another woman, at the end he was like 'only you want this, i did nothing, even he didnt think to take me to doctor, according to him i am doing acting of depression, this made me more depress,one day i feel if we have a baby then will my baby be a normal baby, i didnt want a depress baby, and today i want a baby.,i dnt know there is too much in my mind ,sometimes i get frustrated from me,i want to stop it.

anju,No one deserves to be abused.For ANY reason.It is not okay that he hurts you.Love should never hurt.If it does it is abuse.Please call the national domestic violence hotline at 1-800-799-7233 and ask for help.

HUGS.Lanna

thanx to understand me, i was staying with my husband in london, but after our seperation i left uk forever, now i am in india with my parents.,i was not feeling safe in uk,bcz he was there.

anju,Here are some phone numbers for domestic violence programs in India.

Jagori

011 2669 1219

011 2669 2700

Call M-F 9:30-5:30

Joint women's programme

461-9821