Depression in the family Support Group

Hello, my name is Hanna and i am 19 years old. My mother suffers from depression and anxiety. About seven months ago she tried to kill herslef..twice. I found her the first time and i stayed calm; mostly because i was in shock. She went to this small behavioral ward in the hospital for a couple of days. She met people in there.. but not good people. After she got out nothing changed. It only got so much worse. Maybe a month later she tried again. it was terrible. She called me at school and i didnt have service so i panicked and called my aunt. She told me she was at the hospital with her. That made me feel a little better. She lost a lot of blood though. The basement (where she sleeps and lives pretty much) looked like a crime scene. It was the worst thing i have ever seen. She went to an institution for maybe a month; she hated it there but i was so happy she was there. I stayed at my aunts for that period of time. When she got home she was sober and stayed that way for a couple weeks. I have an older sister, but she seems to be too oblivious to care about what it happening with our mom. I also should add that my mother is an alcoholic. She has been an alcoholic since i was a baby, but the sad thing is i didnt even realize it until a year or two ago. I was so used to that behavior.. that it became the norm for me. I despise my mother's actions. I try to help her, but nothing i do seems to work. As of now, she hasnt been to work in a couple weeks, doesn't see a therapist anymore, drinks way too much, and i am so afraid. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm never happy anymore, and this makes me resent my mother more than anything.. but i dont want that. I'm so lost and scared. I just want to be happy again..

Watching and not beng able to do anything is the worse feeling. And harder yet is trying to get on with our own lives. My suggestions would be - join the local AA group as I believe they have groups for family members? I could be wrong, but thought I heard that once. Maybe find a local chapter of NAMI (National Alliance for Mental Illness) to get ideas from others on how to handle things. always helps to have others who are going thru the same thing or have "been there, done that". Or, maybe you can start seeing a therapist too that can help you work thru the resentment, etc. and teach you how to deal with your situation. A good therapist is hard to find sometimes, but they are out there. If you don't like the first one, don't give up - find someone you can "connect" with.

I'm so sorry for all you've been through with your mom!

han11, I don't have all the answers. From what I've learned is that individuals will self-medicate. That doesn't help matters.

You're a survivor. I'm glad to hear that! Although my mother does not deal with depression, my oldest daughter does. She's had two hospitalizations. It's rough. I can appreciate what you're feeling.

Though my daughter has never tried to commit suicide, she has cut. Fortunately never requiring stitches. It's still scary nonetheless.

This does take a lot out of a person. I know that it has for me emotionally, socially, and psychologically. PM me if you'd like to talk more.

I just wanted you to know that you are being heard.