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Depression Support Group
A community of patients, family members and friends dedicated to dealing with Depression, together.
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10/16/2008 02:04 AM
tommy1303673
Posts: 11
New Member

Hi im thomas 41 yrs, i live in sydney,australia.

2 yrs ago i was diagnosed with clinical depression, mainly due to the fact that i was emotionally abused by a family member for the last 30 plus years. Even tho the abuse has stopped, im still dealing with the guilt.

I cant talk to anyone about what happened because the memories still hurt.

Post edited by: tommy1303673, at: 10/16/2008 03:56

Reply

10/16/2008 10:39 AM  Top
dreamsofinsomnia
dreamsofinsomnia
 
Posts: 1719
VIP Member

I understand. I grew up in a family of secrets and abuse. I was abused by several family members from emotional, psycological, and sexual. The only way to really heal is to talk so i am hear for you
Please, please forgive me,
But I won't be home again.
Maybe someday you'll look up,
And, barely conscious, you'll say to no one:
"Isn't something missing?"

You won't cry for my absence, I know -
You forgot me long ago.
Am I that unimportant...?
Am I so insignificant...?
Isn't something missing?
Isn't someone missing me?

Even though I'm the sacrifice,
You won't try for me, not now.
Though I'd die to know you love me,
I'm all alone.
Isn't someone missing me?

Please, please forgive me,
But I won't be home again.
I know what you do to yourself,
I breathe deep and cry out:
"Isn't something missing?
Isn't someone missing me?"

Even though I'm the sacrifice,
You won't try for me, not now.
Though I'd die to know you love me,
I'm all alone.
Isn't someone missing me?

And if I bleed, I'll bleed,
Knowing you don't care.
And if I sleep just to dream of you
And wake without you there,
Isn't something missing?
Isn't something...

Even though I'm the sacrifice,
You won't try for me, not now.
Though I'd die to know you love me,
I'm all alone.
Isn't something missing?
Isn't someone missing me?



contact me on yahoo messenger under jennyleuchtman

Previous discussions I participated in:
hi all
hi all
Anxiety is taking over

10/16/2008 06:19 PM  Top
Mishy
Mishy
 
Posts: 334
Member

Hi,

Welcome to the group.

It takes us all different amounts of time before we are ready to share what hurts us deeply. Have you or are you seeing a therapist? That is a good place to start building a trusting connection and eventually, hopefully, you will feel comfortable enough to share those things. Sadly, it does hurt and there may never be a time that it doesn't, but part of the healing is learning to express what hurts and learning to live with the hurts. Therapists aren't always the answer and if you can find a friend who is willing to listen to you share, it can be just as beneficial, however a therapist would be better apt at guiding you in the direction you need to go in order to heal. Or perhaps you can get ideas from others about healing, like on this site, and try to incorporate them into your own life. There is always the self-help book route.

If/when you are ready, you might be interested in joining the emotional abuse support group that is on this site.

Thank you for sharing and WELCOME TO THE GROUP! we are here for you and you can always send me a PM.

Hope to see you on the boards,

Mishy

"If you're going through hell, keep going." -Winston Churchill

Previous discussions I participated in:
thinkig of stopping meds
A Fat Rant
I'm new to this group

10/16/2008 07:33 PM  Top
tommy1303673
Posts: 11
New Member

unfortunately i dont trust therapists, when i was 9 yrs,my mum was advised to send me to a therapist, the therapist told my mum i was beyond help,go figure.

10/16/2008 08:37 PM  Top
Mishy
Mishy
 
Posts: 334
Member

Hi Tommy,

I don't blame you for not trusting therapists. I can't believe a therapist would say that to your mother! I went to many therapists as a teenager and none of them helped. The one I actually liked, my parents didn't and they stopped taking me there- go figure! I have trust issues myself. Not only with therapists, but with a lot of people. After we have been hurt so many times, it is natural to start feeling distrusting towards the world. So, now the big question is, how do we change that?

You mentioned something about feeling guilty in your first post, I found this website and thought it might be useful to take a look at-

http://www.12stepforums.net/healingroom/ dealing_with_shame.html

Whenever you are ready to start healing, there are many tools out there and you have taken a big step by joining this group and reaching out.

All the best,

Mishy

"If you're going through hell, keep going." -Winston Churchill

Previous discussions I participated in:
thinkig of stopping meds
A Fat Rant
I'm new to this group

10/16/2008 08:47 PM  Top
mallory8830
mallory8830
 
Posts: 5
New Member

Hello I am new also welcome...

Previous discussions I participated in:
Newbie

11/05/2008 12:15 PM  Top
tommy1303673
Posts: 11
New Member

Hi guys , sorry i havent on for a while, had to take a little visit to the hospital for a few weeks, please dont ask what for,because I dont want to upset anyone, im just dealing with some stuff is all.

Post edited by: tommy1303673, at: 11/05/2008 12:16


11/05/2008 12:36 PM  Top
AndysCandi

Hey Tommy,

Welcome back. Hope you feel better soon.

:o)Ange


11/05/2008 01:56 PM  Top
2bdjm
2bdjm
 
Posts: 24
Member

Hi Tommy, nice to meet you and have you back. I just joined last week. Stay well.

11/05/2008 03:50 PM  Top
tommy1303673
Posts: 11
New Member

thanx guys, its gunna take a long time tho,according my doc.
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