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10/16/2008 02:04 AM

HI IM NEW

tommy1303673
Posts: 11
Member

Hi im thomas 41 yrs, i live in sydney,australia.

2 yrs ago i was diagnosed with clinical depression, mainly due to the fact that i was emotionally abused by a family member for the last 30 plus years. Even tho the abuse has stopped, im still dealing with the guilt.

I cant talk to anyone about what happened because the memories still hurt.

Post edited by: tommy1303673, at: 10/16/2008 03:56

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10/16/2008 10:39 AM
dreamsofinsomnia
dreamsofinsomnia  
Posts: 1719
VIP Member

I understand. I grew up in a family of secrets and abuse. I was abused by several family members from emotional, psycological, and sexual. The only way to really heal is to talk so i am hear for you

10/16/2008 06:19 PM
Mishy
Mishy  
Posts: 338
Member

Hi,

Welcome to the group.

It takes us all different amounts of time before we are ready to share what hurts us deeply. Have you or are you seeing a therapist? That is a good place to start building a trusting connection and eventually, hopefully, you will feel comfortable enough to share those things. Sadly, it does hurt and there may never be a time that it doesn't, but part of the healing is learning to express what hurts and learning to live with the hurts. Therapists aren't always the answer and if you can find a friend who is willing to listen to you share, it can be just as beneficial, however a therapist would be better apt at guiding you in the direction you need to go in order to heal. Or perhaps you can get ideas from others about healing, like on this site, and try to incorporate them into your own life. There is always the self-help book route.

If/when you are ready, you might be interested in joining the emotional abuse support group that is on this site.

Thank you for sharing and WELCOME TO THE GROUP! we are here for you and you can always send me a PM.

Hope to see you on the boards,

Mishy


10/16/2008 07:33 PM
tommy1303673
Posts: 11
Member

unfortunately i dont trust therapists, when i was 9 yrs,my mum was advised to send me to a therapist, the therapist told my mum i was beyond help,go figure.

10/16/2008 08:37 PM
Mishy
Mishy  
Posts: 338
Member

Hi Tommy,

I don't blame you for not trusting therapists. I can't believe a therapist would say that to your mother! I went to many therapists as a teenager and none of them helped. The one I actually liked, my parents didn't and they stopped taking me there- go figure! I have trust issues myself. Not only with therapists, but with a lot of people. After we have been hurt so many times, it is natural to start feeling distrusting towards the world. So, now the big question is, how do we change that?

You mentioned something about feeling guilty in your first post, I found this website and thought it might be useful to take a look at-

http://www.12stepforums.net/healingroom/ dealing_with_shame.html

Whenever you are ready to start healing, there are many tools out there and you have taken a big step by joining this group and reaching out.

All the best,

Mishy


10/16/2008 08:47 PM
mallory8830
mallory8830Posts: 5
New Member

Hello I am new also welcome...

11/05/2008 12:15 PM
tommy1303673
Posts: 11
Member

Hi guys , sorry i havent on for a while, had to take a little visit to the hospital for a few weeks, please dont ask what for,because I dont want to upset anyone, im just dealing with some stuff is all.

Post edited by: tommy1303673, at: 11/05/2008 12:16


11/05/2008 12:36 PM
AndysCandi

Hey Tommy,

Welcome back. Hope you feel better soon.

:o)Ange


11/05/2008 01:56 PM
Deb261
2bdjm  
Posts: 24
Member

Hi Tommy, nice to meet you and have you back. I just joined last week. Stay well.

11/05/2008 03:50 PM
tommy1303673
Posts: 11
Member

thanx guys, its gunna take a long time tho,according my doc.
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