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05/08/2012 11:18 AM

changing my attitudes and thoughts

AsianGoddess

Depression - you are a thief! You are a destroyer of lives! You suck away my dreams, my ambitions, my strength, my courage, my meaning and who I want to be. You are not my friend, you never were. You need me to exist - I don't need you. I don't need to be complacent that you're around anymore. In fact, I want you to leave! Never to come back and torture me again. I want you out of my life and I don't want to ever entertain you in my life and home again. And you better not mistreat any of my friends and family either. Nobody needs you in their lives. I am cleaning house! Every time you knock on my door, I will slam the door at your face. Goodbye, Depression, goodbye!

How I wish that mental picture can take away my depression just like that. Some things are easier said than done. I can give up and throw in the towel allowing Depression to push me around and control my life. Or I can take control back and work against it as often as hard as much as possible. I don't need to want to exercise and stay in the sun to actually do it. I don't need to be inspired to be productive at work and at home. I don't need to feel like being loving to my family and friends to show my love to them as love is more than just an emotion, it is a decision to act lovingly no matter what I face.

Let's kick Depression out of our lives! We don't need it!

Post edited by: AsianGoddess, at: 05/08/2012 11:19 AM

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05/08/2012 02:54 PM
hopefull666
hopefull666Posts: 3
New Member

nicely said

05/09/2012 03:24 AM
vgspace38
 
Posts: 66
Member

I wish i could do that ! I struggle everyday . It sucks .

05/09/2012 05:41 AM
Zetsubou
Zetsubou  
Posts: 261
Member

If only, if only.

05/10/2012 07:16 AM
AsianGoddess

Yes it is hard. But life is hard. (Thank you, Scott Peck!)It's easier to think and be pro-active rather than just react and let life catch you unaware. Besides, the destruction that depression brings is devastating. I got tired of cleaning up after my mess, sometimes the clean up was harder and sometimes, I can't fix the consequences of my actions. I used to write down all my thoughts when I first started this exercise. Any thought that had a negative effect on my emotions, that is. For awhile there, it seemed like that was all I did the entire day. But it helped me to see how I thought and question what I really believed. It also helped me know a little bit about the reason I was feeling depressed at that particular moment. Many a times I had to force myself to stop and think before I act, it was a big struggle to do this for the first time, it's not as hard anymore after practicing it for quite a few years.

I'm still learning to choose my behavior because if I choose right, I also choose my consequence. And everything I say and do has a consequence. I have to weigh the pros and cons before I make a decision because I may not like to pay the price if I make wrong choices.

Post edited by: AsianGoddess, at: 05/10/2012 07:17 AM

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